Österreichische Botschaft Pretoria - Austrian Club - Cape Town

Thought of the DayIf you can start the day without caffeine, if you can always be cheerful, ignoringaches and pains.If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles.If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it, if you canunderstand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any attention.If you can conquer tension without medical help.If you can relax without alcohol, if you can sleep without the aid of drugs, thenyou are probably the Family Dog. Handle every stressful situation like a dog.If you can't eat it or play with it, Pee on itA dizzy BLONDE flying in a two-seater airplane with just the captain.He has a heart attack and dies. She, frantic, calls out a May Day."May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! my pilot had a heart attack and is dead,and I don't know how to fly. Help me! Please help me!"She hears a voice over the radio saying:"This is Air Traffic Control and I hear youloud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I'vehad a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Now, just take a deep breath.Everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position."She says: I'm 5 foot 4 inches and I'm in the front seat.""O.K." says the voice on the radio-------"Repeat after me: "Our Father...who art in Heaven....."Es ist unwichtig, dass die Leute hinter Deinem Rücken reden. Wichtig ist, dasswenn du dich umdrehst, alle den Mund halten.------Du sollst nicht lügen, stehlen, betrügen oder mit Drogen handeln.Die Regierung hasst Konkurenz.-----Er: "Du bist die schönste und süsseste Frau die ich getroffen habe."Sie: "Du willst mich doch nur ins Bett kriegen!"Er: "Und klug bist Du auch."