NEXUS MAGAZINE Snapped Snap nexusmag your shenanigans! The best snap each week (printed with the Burgerfuel logo), wins a voucher from our mates at Burgerfuel. Claim it from the <strong>Nexus</strong> office in SUB. 36 N.<strong>24</strong> / V.47 SUMMER
Blind Date NEXUS MAGAZINE Brought to you by The Bank and 97.8 The Edge. Each week <strong>Nexus</strong> attempts to make a love/sexual connection. if you’re keen for a date on us, email editor@nexusmag.co.nz Just like last week, his favourite artist is Ed Sheeran (why?), and she likes Taylor Swift. He likes “the old faithful missionary” and referred to the clitoris as the “turbo button”; she originally said her favourite sex position was “one with a dick in me”, but specified that reverse cowgirl is actually her one true fave. She also let us know she’s had regular STI checks (which is super responsible), so let’s see if <strong>2015</strong>’s last Blind Date goes out with a bang... XX The Lady’s Experience Had a few pre drinks but I’m still feeling nervous. I turned up first, my date turned up a few minutes later, looking pretty decent. The small talk was a little bit awkward, but the bar tab got the conversation flowing. We decided to skip dinner and just get drinks. Eventually the conversation got to movies, which is when I found out the type of guy he really is. Doesn’t like Harry Potter, and wants the All Blacks to lose! It seemed like only a few drinks later when we were told we only had $3 left, so we decided it was a good idea to walk to the nearest alcohol shop, get smashed and go to hospo night. Disappointment after a tipsy walk to Thirsty’s in my heels only to find out it was closed. We decided to head back to my flat. At the flat all I could offer him was warm beer and Kristoff, he handled it pretty well. After a few drinks we decided to move things to my bedroom. Famous last words as I say ‘no sex, just sleeping’ on the way down the hallway. One thing led to another and it got heated. The sex was good the first time, despite his random toilet break halfway through… Round two in the morning wasn’t as good though; I must have been sober. Apart from finding his dried up chewing gum on my floor in the morning it was a pretty good night. Thanks a lot <strong>Nexus</strong>! XY The Gentleman’s Experience Going out required pre-loading. I sunk my way through half a box so I’d be drunk enough to be charming, but still sober enough to not be re-enacting the lemons scene from Wolf of Wall Street. I arrive at The Bank on time and find my date waiting for me at the table. As I wandered over I was having a scout to see what I was getting myself into, not my usual type but not too shabby. Going through the usual routine: degree, hometown etc, I was 2 minutes into the date when I realised that I had completely forgotten her name. Class act right there. We started pounding the drinks back, I didn’t want food to waste the tab, and she agreed, so it was looking good. Two hours in the waiter brought us a couple more shots and told us that we had $3 on the tab. Panic set in, we needed to keep the liquid flowing. A wander down to Thirsty’s was in need, but the Trusty Orange was shut! She said that there were some drinks at hers and we could drink there before heading back for hospo, I could see the signs. After polishing some cheeky Smirnies there wasn’t much energy left in the tank and bed was calling. I didn’t quite get back to mine as another bed was much, much closer. As she opens the door to her room I’m greeted with a pair of handcuffs and condoms on the bed, I just thought of the write up and after all it’d be rude not to. All in all I was treated to a good night, with a lovely lass, whose name I still can’t remember (sorry). 37