you're cold and I burn (on hold)

evident on Louis’ face as he scrolls to answer. “Liam, how’ve you been, beautiful?”
“Most divine, thank you. You seem to be chipper today, what’s the oh-ccasion?”
“Nothing, just enjoying the world, I’ve decorated in lavender, Liam. You know, the color of
calm?” Louis picks at his nails, removing any remnants that may have been lodged during his last
little project. Which actually turned out to be a complete bust.
“What happened to ‘tree-canopy’ green?”
“Still one of my favorites, but after all the stress of this week I needed to be surrounded in
something that would help me breathe a little easier. The color of nature doesn’t do much when
you’re bordering a panic attack, you know.”
“Why are you bordering a panic attack? Is this because of money, again?”
Louis lifts himself from the bed, blissfully <strong>and</strong> easily as he finds his way into the bathroom,
lighting another c<strong>and</strong>le before running a stream of <strong>burn</strong>ing hot water, “Money is but an object,
something that defines worth, <strong>and</strong> it’s not going to bog me down. I refuse to worry about paper,
when my mind is better occupied elsewhere.”
“You live alone, Louis. You need a steady source of income. You have responsibilities <strong>and</strong> such,
it’s not the time to brush everything off like it’s not important.”
“What other choice do I have, exactly? I cannot force myself into a painting, you know that they
come when they’re ready. There’s nothing I can do to speed the process. Is this news to you?”
“No. But, you’re like a brother to me <strong>and</strong> I refuse to watch you lose yourself in debt because
you’re so focused on being artistic about everything. Call dad, tell him you need a little help. But
you need to start looking for another job, just t’give you that stability, okay?”
“Breaking every individual bone in my body sounds more enjoyable than that, Liam.” Louis
murmurs. Steam is rolling over the surface of the water as he dips his toes in, feeling the heat run
in bursts up his legs. All over his body, <strong>and</strong> he sucks in a sharp breath. “I told him if he wouldn’t
be supportive of my lifestyle, then I didn’t want him in my life at all. He pounded it into my head
that I would certainly meet failure, but this is what makes me happy. I can’t give him the
satisfaction of knowing I need his help.”
“So you admit it,” Liam says through the line, <strong>and</strong> Louis’ body is matching the temperature of the
water, mostly because he’s starting to get really pissed off, “You need dad’s help?”
“Don’t fucking start this, he has a formal invitation to kiss my ass, that’s about it. I don’t want his
pity.”
“You spend too much money decorating your flat in all different colors, then you don’t even have
enough to pay your fucking rent, Louis. Do you see a problem here?” Liam’s generally kind voice
cuts through the line like a sharpened dagger. And it slices through Louis’ veil, one that cloaks
him in faux nonchalance.
There’s a silence, the heated water jostling under Louis' touch as he tries to stop the inevitable sad
that’s spreading over every inch of his body. When he speaks, his voice is a mere whisper, <strong>and</strong>
conveys everything that Louis is feeling right now, “The colors make me feel better.”
A deep breath, <strong>and</strong> Louis can almost hear Liam shake his head, “I’m sorry, I know they do. I’m
looking out for what’s best for you, we’ve grown up together. And your dad might have wanted a
different career path for you, but he loves you, <strong>and</strong> he will always help you if you need it, Louis.