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Liberty<br />

Issue 9<br />

<strong>May</strong> <strong>2017</strong><br />

&<br />

Restraint<br />

www.libertyandrestraint.com<br />

Free<br />

COMMON ONLINE<br />

MYTHS?<br />

I am a Dom/Master, Hear me<br />

Roar<br />

One thing that has become very<br />

apparent to me is the amount of<br />

common online myths associated with Ds<br />

or BDSM experience but what can be<br />

experienced in this medium?<br />

FEATURES<br />

THROWN TO THE<br />

FLOOR!<br />

A series of articles designed to provoke<br />

thought and challenge! Follow Sir<br />

Arithon as he tackles those unpopular<br />

theories on a wide variety of topics.<br />

The French<br />

Connection<br />

Shivers Down<br />

my Spine<br />

Simply Online<br />

http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/ParrotHead%20Cove/165/186/41


Letter from the editor<br />

Editors<br />

Flame Jie<br />

Sir Arithon<br />

Kaderin Luminos<br />

This is a month of personal<br />

change for me, finding my<br />

level and peace, that<br />

inherent onward march<br />

towards change.<br />

Columnists<br />

A. Sands<br />

Chef Lew<br />

Freelance Writers<br />

Kacey Raines<br />

It seems that often few<br />

focus on the need to stand<br />

naked, to let go of the<br />

barriers, the societal<br />

conditioning... to tap into<br />

that place inside you that<br />

makes you inherently<br />

vulnerable to the person<br />

you eventually consent to submit too.....the soul, the emotions<br />

that connect Dominant and submissive, Master and<br />

slave.....When i think of my past relationships and the marks<br />

they have left on my soul i smile.....The marks that I wear on<br />

my soul are marks that will stay with me forever. They have<br />

become a part of me, a part of my growth, a part of my<br />

journey in life. They will never fade...It takes a lot of bravery<br />

for both Dominant and Submissive to find the space, to just<br />

be….<br />

One of the draws of this lifestyle for me is the emotional and<br />

intellectual energy, the intensity of the power exchange. The<br />

moral, emotional nature and sense of identity that comes from<br />

being totally in touch and at peace with myself.<br />

This issue excites me as we are<br />

having a free topic month,<br />

encouraging the creative juices of our writers to<br />

tease and tantalise you our readers.<br />

Happy reading!<br />

Flame x


In this Issue….<br />

Contents<br />

Thrown to the floor<br />

Articles, by Sir Arithon. The<br />

refreshing no holds barred<br />

viewpoint on all things D/s.<br />

Articles<br />

Le thème du mois<br />

d'avril tourne autour du<br />

mot "Frenzy"<br />

Article translated into<br />

French for our<br />

international readers<br />

D/shion<br />

Our Introduction to second life<br />

fashion D/s photography.<br />

Whats on in second life<br />

Our VIP section. This section will<br />

introduce you to some of the<br />

wonderful places you can visit and<br />

enjoy in second life. Also some of the<br />

educational groups you can join for<br />

quality lifestyle and community<br />

information<br />

Kinky Kitchen<br />

The Party (part two)<br />

second part of the<br />

drama, written by Kacey<br />

Raines<br />

Common online myths<br />

myths/beliefs that for<br />

some reason are very<br />

prevalent online. ~Author<br />

Unknown<br />

“Submission”<br />

The third of 4<br />

monologues describing<br />

the journey to the collar<br />

by Sir Arithon<br />

Online vs. Real Life D/s<br />

Once upon a time I lived<br />

in a world online. ©<br />

within Reality: danae<br />

2000 - all rights reserved<br />

Amazing recipe’s by Sir<br />

Cheflew


In this Issue….<br />

Contents<br />

Classifieds<br />

Information and advertisement for<br />

venues and Shops online<br />

Articles<br />

Gallery<br />

Erotic art, Editor’s picks.<br />

Useful links<br />

like the web? Follow these<br />

crumbs for fun and<br />

information.<br />

Simply Online<br />

Specific content for those of the<br />

lifestyle who only practice in Second<br />

life or other online platforms and how<br />

you might manage relationships in<br />

these spaces.<br />

Coming up…<br />

A sexy glimpse into all that is<br />

new, hot and exciting in<br />

Liberty & Restraint Magazine.


Submission<br />

“Submission”<br />

The third of 4 monologues describing<br />

the journey to the collar<br />

by Sir Arithon<br />

A set of four monoluges<br />

by Sir Arithon. Short<br />

pieces in the journey to<br />

the collar. Until recently<br />

the set had not been<br />

completed and i would<br />

ask that you review them<br />

and give an honest<br />

critique of the content.<br />

This series will appear<br />

over the next month’s in<br />

the magazine and will<br />

also be available on our<br />

blog and website.<br />

Happy reading!<br />

Submission (Part 3)<br />

Finally he decides to<br />

engage with that side of<br />

him and embrace the<br />

girl.<br />

Next month will see<br />

“Dominance” the fourth<br />

in the series of the<br />

monologues.


The woman stands, she could be forgiven as being asleep if not for the restlessness of<br />

her stance. Inside her mind tumbled. " him was it him?" had it always been him? .<br />

He gave no sign before, her mind turning, bent on self doubt "no, no surely I would have<br />

known ". She looked just briefly but those eyes captured everything. Each detail of the<br />

prospect but.. .<br />

Damn she thought there was always a but!!! She sighed. Wrestling inside as desire<br />

mounted it's relentless attack on doubt. She must think. .<br />

The woman stands - ok so things had not been perfect. This colourful world had not<br />

delivered a wealth of peace and promise. .<br />

Tilting her head as if to strain to hear that inner Voice calling from far away. Locked away<br />

never trusted "it's him" She shakes it off no! conscious of her skin blushing yet whisper<br />

"maybe".<br />

The woman stands: frustrated now by her lack of action. "just ask him" her feet frozen in<br />

place, throat dry and restricted. Words stumbling to form some sensible language. She<br />

st<strong>amp</strong>s her foot. damn!! Then a smile..<br />

Memories fresh of how he moves his surety of foot. Never touched but ... Oh how she is<br />

drawn. An invisible thread of compulsion tugging her toward him. .<br />

The woman stands - oh the others pull and jostle for positions of importance within the<br />

ranks. Always keen to offer advice but somehow she is sure that this has to be her<br />

decision. .<br />

Yet to make it will cost she knows. To do this thing.. This ultimate action A testimony to<br />

her soul. To be so at risk. Oh the risk of it terrified her to the core and yet such<br />

excitement boiled within. She smiles .<br />

The woman stands - smile broadens the jigsaw of the ragged thoughts slips into the<br />

beautiful tapestry of decision. It would be him. His ragged past no Obstacle to the future<br />

she would offer..


Honesty and truth in the end would pave the way. She almost laughed. Doubt was turned<br />

into the basis of trust. Sure would remain until time eroded it but more in herself, her<br />

ability to overcome self doubt years of it. .<br />

She was sure that this was the way she wanted to go. Giddy with it, alive with the<br />

promise of it. Heart racing. Smile so wide. He's here... .<br />

The girl kneels. Back straight eyes fixed on him. Hands on her delicate thighs. Slightly<br />

spread, proud, elated. She shines with the peace of the moment. .<br />

Decision made and committed into action. Offering herself but also accepting him. All his<br />

faults all the mistakes erased. No that’s not right. He wouldn't allow that. .He would say<br />

turned into lessons harsh lessons designed so they would not be ever repeated. She<br />

sighs and submits to him.?


D/shion<br />

by A.Sands<br />

Our Introduction to second life fashion<br />

& D/s photography.


Plastic Paradise<br />

Visiting Collabor88 I found again R2<br />

fashion. It is one of those shops I loved<br />

but that I do not how are forgotten into<br />

my landmarks folder. I was really happy<br />

to see their logo again and clicked to visit<br />

their main shop. The next I knew was I<br />

had found this month subject. R2 shop<br />

has become into the plastic fetish<br />

paradise. Most of the outfits include also<br />

boots, and at least one also a cap, all for<br />

Maitreya bodies, but as I always say, try<br />

the demos, a dress made for another<br />

skeleton could fit yours perfectly.


Purple:<br />

- r2 A/D/E shou [liquid purple].<br />

- phedora. Andromeda Boots.<br />

Green/Sheer:<br />

- r2 A/D/E shun suit[sheer] /<br />

[green] (dress).<br />

- r2 A/D/E shun suit[sheer] /<br />

[green] (underwear).<br />

- r2 A/D/E shun boots[sheer.<br />

Manicure: Nailed it Vendor - All<br />

in One - Bright Set.<br />

Make-up: Zibska Ora Omega<br />

Applie.


R2 Fashion


Thrown to the floor…<br />

Evocative articles by Sir<br />

Arithon.


Over the years I have research into the more fictional works that touch on the<br />

lifestyle of the Dominant and submissive but what was more interesting was<br />

the sheer volume of discussion about what was wrong with these women. I<br />

mean seriously it appears that regardless of consent which is the single most<br />

important factor here, regardless of personal choice and based on nothing it<br />

seems more tangible than "girls good Men bad!" there are literally hundreds<br />

of what I once thought of as highly intelligent professional people suggesting<br />

that unless the woman has full control of all aspects of the bedroom then<br />

there simply must be abuse. Plus I staggered to discover that the whole<br />

spectrum of submissive behaviour is not to be widely debated at all.<br />

Submissive men do not even get a foot note compared to women. I can only<br />

assume that the number of people in the world that understand the true<br />

nature of relationships is much smaller than I had hoped. So for those people<br />

so convinced that they are right and all people need to conform to their view<br />

of the world I pose some simple questions and invite responses to several<br />

simple truths. I say truths because facts are always from a certain point of<br />

view Truth is Truth.<br />

why is it so complicated for you to understand that some women or men just<br />

don't want to prove to the world they are better than everyone else?<br />

Why is a successful Woman or man at a senior level considered exceptionally<br />

talented if they make it to the top and victimised and abused if they don’t?<br />

why do you think it is ok to discriminate when you decide to put the word<br />

positive in front of it?<br />

Why do you assume that the private sexual rituals of any couple are any<br />

concern of yours?<br />

the truth is most relationships are about two people taking from one another<br />

what it is they want from a relationship<br />

the truth is that BDSM dynamics are about what two people can freely give to<br />

each other<br />

the truth is that the word dominate and the word abuse are not n the same<br />

class of action. After all people can dominate the field of play in competition<br />

and not be regarded as an abuser.<br />

the truth is that in a BDSM community abusers are cast out when discovered.<br />

Do I need to back fill.? ok let us surmise for a second that you whom are<br />

reading this know very little of BDSM. or more specifically the branch of the<br />

lifestyle that describes the deeper dynamic, the power exchange between the<br />

Dominant and the submissive.


By way of introduction to this story you should know that there is in fact a<br />

dynamic above and beyond the traditional marriage whether that be same<br />

sex or heterosexual (referred to as vanilla). it is not a new phenomena either,<br />

being in my view a returning to the natural order of things. you should know<br />

too that this isn't about the well known Hollywood porn industry portrayal of<br />

whips and chains, gimp masks and straps so many people naturally assume<br />

is at the core of the lifestyle.. Oh and if I did like that? what business would it<br />

be of anyone outside the bedroom?<br />

Oh and please be clear I do not attempt to convert within these writings so<br />

should you be reading them please at least offer those within the pages the<br />

respect and courtesy of not being judged. My only other stipulations are as<br />

follows:<br />

1) Have an open mind.<br />

2) Please don't try this at home.<br />

I am a Dominant. A Dom holds the keys to his Submissives mind body and<br />

soul. My Submissive gave me that power freely and with an open mind and<br />

more importantly with full consent born out of a knowledge of all that it<br />

entailed. Consent is the single most important factor here and it is wise for<br />

everyone to remember that. It must be given and is never to be taken for<br />

granted.<br />

This joining is called a collaring. In most cases it involves the physical placing<br />

of a collar around the neck of the submissive in a deeply personal ritual that<br />

symbolises much much more than a traditional swapping of rings typical of<br />

Vanilla marriages. At this point the submissive becomes the property of the<br />

Dominant who placed the collar and yes that means exactly what it says.<br />

Their life is no longer their own. Yet there is a freedom within this captivity<br />

found in no other type of dynamic.<br />

I can sense a few horrified glances at this so let me also say that before the<br />

collaring the terms or ownership are always negotiated and consent is sought<br />

for all aspects of this control. Oh and if you are considering it as a lifestyle<br />

choice? Make sure you don't rush things at this stage.<br />

What I will say is this. In my view if you seek a relationship that has a high<br />

chance of standing the test of time, has resolution built into the framework to<br />

handle all its problems, is built of 100% trust and never has issues of<br />

infidelity, boredom or suspicion then the D/s is the only place you are<br />

guaranteed to find it. I will warn you though it's not easy and requires a great<br />

deal of commitment.<br />

This is not to say that mistakes are not made. Gods I have made tons of<br />

them. I am not perfect by and means and I do not always make the right<br />

choices. This is about the type of relationship you want and the will to make it<br />

work.


Now for some unpopular stuff<br />

No matter what your faith system, theological belief or spiritual mantra it has<br />

to be said that we humans were not made equal. Nor was any one gender',<br />

race or creed made better than any other. We are all different but we do have<br />

inherent genetic code that compels us to fulfil what nature intended and not<br />

what society dictates.<br />

It is a fact that society actually works against this in many ways and is<br />

perhaps a good indicator of why many people are unhappy. This section is<br />

bound to get a few heckles up but the truth is that In our desperate scurry to<br />

prove we are not like animals we have engineered our own set of snares<br />

which have the undesirable effect of not only making the vast majority of<br />

people miserable but also damaging us as a species.<br />

Let me elaborate before the in crowd of pro all women short lists and positive<br />

discrimination gurus set about getting a posse together. I am not in any way<br />

saying that people should be curtailed in ability or opportunity what I am<br />

saying is that should a person wish to offer themselves in submission then<br />

society better well stop thinking something is wrong with them. A woman who<br />

wishes of her own free will to enter a D/s relationship (Dominant/ Submissive)<br />

should be given the same respect as the Lady vice president of Sears.<br />

Those who believe in the creation myth or have a deep rooted faith in any of<br />

the main stream religions are protected under hate crime laws in most of the<br />

western world so I would argue those who believe D/s should be afforded the<br />

same protection. If women who want to follow what they believe to be the<br />

natural order of things give those ch<strong>amp</strong>ions of equality a tough time then ask<br />

yourself this. If the price of your belief and your conviction comes at the cost<br />

of another, who is the villain? If some women seek the security of knowing<br />

they serve a man who loves them, protects and guides them then who the<br />

blazes are you to judge them harshly? Remember to some people a man on<br />

a cross was just a Roman execution and a burning bra simply a waste of<br />

good underwear.<br />

BDSM is a lifestyle choice and a such has every right to go about its business<br />

unmolested. At its core is consent, trust and absolute respect. When a person<br />

takes a collar it is every bit as deep, spiritual and emotional as any traditional<br />

joining of couples.<br />

Ok that's the introduction out of the way so here are a few more musings……<br />

Follow Sir Arithon’s<br />

popular column next<br />

month, when he shares<br />

those Dominant<br />

musings!


Kinky Kitchen


Monthly recipe section by<br />

the talented Sir Cheflew,<br />

with theme driven, topical<br />

writing on health issues.


As a Chef, routinely shy but serious questions have been softly spoken in whispers as to<br />

what spices in a kitchen can help their love life. Generally, it’s because they are trying to<br />

find ways to excite their play partner in whatever dynamic they are into. As with any food<br />

you want to wash it first as you never really know where or what was used to preserve<br />

that food item. Course for those not as daring you could put the food item into a condom<br />

which would prevent any of it from touching sensitive exposed skin. Spices can and will<br />

cause irritation so I recommend the oil extract type of spices. Two reasons 1.) A little<br />

goes a long way and 2.) You can dilute with oil/water. If you or your partner are unsure<br />

its ok to take small steps as I say to mine often. Test the oil/spice with a cotton swab on<br />

an area of skin prior to play. If you are allergic do not use the item. Another caution is<br />

make sure that you do not use on a cut or whip marks abrasions unless you are into that<br />

extreme sensation. Some items list below has made the list of Spices/oil’s that can be<br />

used on libra, penis, balls/testicles, nipples and anus.<br />

Opens kitchen pantry and looks with a grin;<br />

Cinnamon oil – Cause a nice hot reaction or feeling when<br />

used in libra. One should dilute with oil or water – 1 spice<br />

oil/20 Drops oil rule to start then experiment down to 5 or<br />

even straight. Can be used on libra and or anal. Nipples<br />

are a great place to use for oils like this and well I have<br />

heard not use tiger balm on nipples. Course Ice is my<br />

preference so adding a drop of oil per ice cube to start<br />

then 2 drops making each cube a bit stronger.Peppermint<br />

Oil – Provides a nice cooling sensation and can be used<br />

just as above.<br />

Speaking of peppermint as your partner to enjoy a<br />

peppermint candy and lick your most sensitive areas I am<br />

sure you both will be surprised at the results it has. Goes<br />

both for male and female and why eating a Altoids<br />

became so popular and still are and you can always use<br />

a TicTac to do the same. (Adding a hard candy recipe to bottom of this post)<br />

Wintergreen oil – Very close to same results as peppermint oils but a slightly different<br />

cooling.


Now if you want hot sensation, picks up Jalapeño oil and looks at it this will do the trick.<br />

Course there are a number or Oriental oils that run hot but seem to increase in heat over<br />

time instead of decreasing so those well are not for beginners. Imagine putting tabasco<br />

sauce on your masters/mistress sensitive area or vice a versa. Steak sauce has some<br />

unique effects as well.<br />

Good test is to put oil on fingertip and lightly touch tongue. Stay away from dry spices as<br />

they can cause issues that oil does not in those nice sensitive areas.<br />

Eyes a box of Jell-O, can be used as an item to lick off body and oh so many flavours.<br />

Sprinkle over body and well you could have your submissive lick off to help them find the<br />

areas you wish them to discover and holds true for submissive to their Dominate.<br />

As will anything, be safe but have fun in the kinky kitchen. Love to hear your thoughts.<br />

Peppermint Hard Candy (or the flavour you like best) You will need the following<br />

ingredients;<br />

1 tablespoon butter<br />

2 cups sugar<br />

1 cup light corn syrup<br />

1 to 1-1/2 teaspoons peppermint extract<br />

1 teaspoon vanilla extract<br />

6 to 8 drops food colouring, optional to you favourite colour<br />

(Powder sugar)


Directions;<br />

Line a 13-in. x 9-in. pan with foil. Grease the foil with 1 tablespoon butter; set aside.<br />

In a large heavy saucepan, combine sugar and corn syrup. Bring to a boil over medium<br />

heat, stirring occasionally. Cover and cook for 3 minutes to dissolve sugar crystals.<br />

Uncover; cook over medium-high heat, without stirring, until a candy thermometer reads<br />

300° (hard-crack stage).<br />

Remove from the heat; stir in extracts and food colouring. Pour into prepared pan. Cool;<br />

break into pieces. Store in airtight containers. Yield: about 1-1/4 pounds. I use powder<br />

sugar to keep them from sticking together and highly recommend you do the same.


The French Connection<br />

Le thème du mois d'avril tourne autour du<br />

mot "Frenzy"<br />

J'ai du étudier la définition de près...<br />

Traduit, cela donne:<br />

1. Un état d'agitation mentale violente, de<br />

très grande excitation<br />

2. Une forme de folie temporaire, de délire<br />

3. un état maniaque<br />

En français, j'ai aussi trouvé: se mettre dans tous ses états. J'utiliserai parfois "frenzy"<br />

dans ce texte... Je crois que j'ai adopté le mot. J'ai écrit ce texte en pensant en<br />

anglais, je le traduis donc et c'est parfois difficile. Je découvre des passages où<br />

j'aimerais être plus précise, moins simpliste. Mais je m'en tiendrai à la traduction.<br />

Un mot qui semble donc dépendre un état émotionel assez extrême. En même temps,<br />

remis dans un contexte de D/s et sur SL, j'ai repensé à des situations où je me suis<br />

malheureusement reconnue.<br />

Pourquoi SL et pas RL? Je ne sais pas si j'ai saisi toutes les nuances de la définition<br />

de "Frenzy", mais dans mon cas.. Je pense que RL, j'ai des gardes fou qui me<br />

préservent de ces états très émotionnels, qui les gardent en quelque sorte en laisse.<br />

Cela ne veut pas dire que, RL, je ne crie jamais, je ne perds jamais patience ou ne<br />

laisse pas échapper certans mots que je regrette, mais je ne pense pas avoir jamais<br />

atteint ce niveau "frenzy" d'agitation mentale et émotionelle.<br />

Comme beaucoup, j'utilise SL pour explorer ma facette soumise, parce que RL en a<br />

décidé autrement et j'y suis plus Dominante. J'ai quelques expériences RL en tant que<br />

soumise, mais elles ont toujours été limitées dans le temps et représentent plus des<br />

"bulles où le temps s'arrêtait un moment" qu'un véritable mode de vie.


Il y a une notion de violence dans cette définition de "frenzy".. Violence émotionelle, soit,<br />

mais violence quand même. Violence dirigée contre les autres, au travers de simples<br />

mots ou actions, mais aussi violence contre soi même. Une forme d'auto punition pour<br />

être à ce point demandeuse et émotive.<br />

C'est à mon sens à ce niveau, où le comportement des<br />

Dominants est crucial. Je ne peux parler que de mon cas,<br />

mais si l'on admet que mes écarts sont "frenzy"... J'ai<br />

rencontré des gens merveilleux, qui m'ont aidée à résoudre<br />

ces crises rapidement, mais aussi d'autres qui ont agravé la<br />

situation, volontairement ou pas. Et, so l'on excepte de rares<br />

personnes, qui semblent prendre plaisir à faire du mal aux<br />

autres, je dirais que, la plupart du temps, c'est seulement...<br />

difficile de comprendre une soumise qui entre dans une<br />

spirale de sentiments négatifs, qui se répercutent sur des<br />

actions tout aussi négatives.<br />

Mais... Qu'est-ce qui<br />

fonctionne avec moi?<br />

Au moment où la crise se produit, rien,<br />

malheureusement. Et le plus important est de ...<br />

simplement m'empêcher de parler. Et je sais combien<br />

c'est dangereux, d'essayer de faire cela à qualqu'un<br />

comme moi qui souffre de diarhée verbale quand je me<br />

sens au plus bas. Je dirais juste qu'il y a une commande<br />

dans mon collier, qui stoppe les IMs, le chat, les TP...<br />

Littéralement, l'idée est de m'arrêter. Et je sais combien<br />

c'est difficile pour un Dominant de prendre cette<br />

responsabilité. Mais, accompagné par un court message<br />

"Je sais que tu te sens mal, nous ennse que pour moi,<br />

c'est le plus efficace.<br />

Maintenant... Ce qui se passe après....<br />

Je pense réellement que mes moments "frenzy" me frappent quand je me sens<br />

incomprise, insécure, minuscule.... Minuscule comme un être puéril, mais aussi dans le<br />

sens où tout, tout à coup, semble difficile à atteindre. Je m'appitoie sur moi même, en<br />

somme.


En fait, quand je dis que j'utilise SL pour explorer, il serait plus juste de dire qu'année<br />

après année, sur SL, j'ai construit une forme d'équilibre entre deux facettes de moi<br />

même, la personne heureuse et relativement sereine, RL, mais avec beaucoup de<br />

responsabilités, y compris émotionelles, et la même, en plus fragile, sur SL, qui montre<br />

un aspect quasiment secret RL: la soumise.<br />

J'ai fini par accepter il y a maintenant longtemps que cette part de moi est très<br />

émotionelle sur SL. Pourquoi? Parce qu'elle ne<br />

contrôle pas ses émotions comme dans la vie RL, au<br />

contraire, elle les vit pleinement. Elle donne beaucoup<br />

d'elle même, mais en retour, elle est très demandeuse,<br />

très dépendante. Elle fait plus confiance, elle montre<br />

ses besoins et ses émotions, voire les monte en<br />

épingle, mais elle a aussi un incroyable besoin<br />

d'attention et de compréhension, à un tel point que... si<br />

elle se sent trahie... Elle peut justement devenir<br />

"frenzy"... Je peux devenir "frenzy"...<br />

Je pense que je ne suis pas la seule qui se trouve<br />

soudain impliquée sur SL dans des conflits fous,qui<br />

perd patience, finit même parfois par en pleurer RL, se<br />

sent blessée, et quand un nouveau jour RL se lève, se<br />

demande "Comment est-ce possible que ça m'affecte<br />

tant, quand, dans la même situation RL, j'aurais résolu<br />

ce conflit facilement, je serais sereine et là, en<br />

repensant à ce conflit SL, je me sens nerveuse et<br />

blessée?!"<br />

Je pense que pour moi, me sentir parfois "frenzy" et rechercher parfois désespérement<br />

des paroles rassurantes et consolantes après.... sont des travers directement liés au<br />

nombre d'émotions et sentiments que je libère quand je rentre dans cet état de<br />

soumise sur SL. Je me fais parfois l'effet d'être un enfant, un sentiment puéril qui me<br />

pousse à rechercher à donner une confiance aveugle à quelqu'un, à rechercher une<br />

autorité, mais aussi, une forme de compréhension et d'indulgence. Cela peut me<br />

perturber parfois.. Moi, une femme capable de bien mener sa RL, qui apparait souvent<br />

même comme un roc, se sent comme une enfant capricieux, à la recherche d'un<br />

mélange de domination et de compréhension, au point de parfois tomber dans un état<br />

émotionel d'agitation et de folie (frenzy!) qui peut même la mener... à se blesser elle<br />

même. Naturellement, pas une blessure physique (à part finir la bouteille de vin si une<br />

crise fait rage, en sachant pertinemment que ce n'est qu'une vengeance contre ma<br />

propre stupidité! :) ) Non... Mais à certains moments, j'ai pris des décisions sur SL qui<br />

n'allaient blesser que moi même et qui étaient loin d'être matures et réfléchies:<br />

supprimer tous mes amis, m'enfermer dans une cage pendant des jours et quasiment<br />

m'hypnotiser en regardant les barreaux, etc.


Cela veut dire que la gestion post-crise est cruciale, j'ai besoin de Domination, mais<br />

aussi tellement de sécurité. A ces moments, c'est un équilibre à recréer. Le moment<br />

terrible est passé.. Les racines du mal doivent être traitées... Cependant, même dans un<br />

cadre D/s... Ces crises sont tellement douloureuses... que je pense qu'une "punition"<br />

n'est pas une bonne idée. Ca ne veut pas du tout dire que cela doit êter oublié... Mais<br />

une discussion sérieuse à propos du "problème", une note décrivant mes sentiments sur<br />

tout cela, un encouragement ou un ordre pour m'excuser si j'ai dépassé les bornes avec<br />

certains, ou au moins une note pour m'expliquer... Je<br />

pense que c'est plus adéquat. Pourquoi? Je pense que<br />

ces moments "Frenzy" sont directement liés à des<br />

sentiments de souffrance, des souvenirs de situations<br />

semblables, des blessures que je croyais oubliées et qui<br />

s'ouvrent comme ça... Par surprise. Ces émotions<br />

négatives peuvent en fait frapper n'importe quelle<br />

personne équilibrée et, quand nous sommes sur SL...<br />

Nous n'avons pas les filtres que nous utilisons<br />

habituellement RL. Ces moments "frenzy" peuvent être<br />

incroyablement violents, mais aussi resserrer de<br />

nombreux liens, de confiance et de soumission.<br />

Ce ne sont naturellement que mes sentiments... Merci de<br />

m'avoir lue.<br />

“I took a deep breath my body finally calm against him. He ran his hand up my<br />

neck and into my hair, pulling my face to his kissing me. Groaning as his lips<br />

took mine, his tongue darting between my lips, kissing me urgently”.<br />

The Party part 2 by Kacey Raines


Shivers down my spine…


The Party Part 2<br />

I took a deep breath my body finally calm against him. He ran his hand up my neck and<br />

into my hair, pulling my face to his kissing me. Groaning as his lips took mine, his tongue<br />

darting between my lips, kissing me urgently. His grip in my hair getting a bit tighter, as he<br />

took the kiss deeper, toying with my tongue hungrily, I could feel his need as we kissed.<br />

He smiled as he pulled his lips from mine. “You did very well little one, I was concerned<br />

your nerves would inhibit you, and I’m beyond pleased that they did not.” “Now how much<br />

of my conversation with Samantha did you grasp in your climaxing state.” I blushed very<br />

bright once more, “I think I got the meaning of it quite well Sir.” “And how do you feel<br />

about it little one?” he asked watching my face as I thought about it, “I’m not certain Sir,<br />

I’m not sure I’d how comfortable with another person doing things to me, and I can’t say I’d<br />

be overly comfortable watching you do them to another person either Sir, I’ll not say that I<br />

will never be comfortable with it, especially if it is something that would please you, but for<br />

the moment I think it would be a touch overwhelming.” He smiled brushing my cheek<br />

softly “A very good answer little one, thank you for being honest with me, I know that it’s<br />

difficult for you, to say something that you think will disappoint me. I’m very proud of you.<br />

And yes the idea of watching you with another excites me a great deal, far more than you<br />

watching me with another to be honest, but it’s something we can discuss in the future as<br />

you become more comfortable sexually.” “Thank you, Sir.” I said softly, smiling into his<br />

eyes.


“Now little one I have to say that you have me quite aroused and I have been since we<br />

started dancing.” He stood me on my feet, standing up next to me. He undressed<br />

himself quickly and carefully, laying his suit over the back of the lounge, before pulling<br />

me in for another deep kiss, our tongues tangling, as he unzipped my dress slipping it<br />

from my shoulders and down my waist, pulling from my lips to slip it down my legs and<br />

allow me to step out of it, then slipping my panties from me just as gracefully and easily<br />

as he had my dress. He laid it over the lounge with his suit, taking my hand as he sat<br />

back on the lounge, this time placing both feet firmly on the ground, his ass near the<br />

edge of the lounge, leaning back just a bit as he turned me once more.<br />

He backed me up to his lap, parting his knees slightly placing my legs on either side of<br />

them guiding me down to a hover just over his lap. My body and face, towards the crowd<br />

once more instead of facing him. I cringed a little. His tip teased between my lips<br />

brushing my clit, then to my entrance pushing softly against it, then back to my clit<br />

teasing it once more. I gasped trembling a little over him. He brought his arm up<br />

wrapping it around my waist his other hand firmly on my hip. This time when his tip<br />

pressed to my entrance he pressed me down, nice and slow, easing himself into me. I<br />

put my hands firmly on his thighs digging my fingers in as he slid deeper and deeper,<br />

inhaling sharply as the remainder of his long shaft settled deep inside me. He let it rest<br />

there a moment letting me adjust to his size once more, before he guided me up just a<br />

slow, his cock inching out of me. He pulled me back a bit more, resting my back against<br />

his chest as I started to thrust back down on him, moving just a bit quicker letting him<br />

sink between my slick tight walls. He groaned loudly in my ear, moving his hand from my<br />

hip, across my waist and between my legs, massaging my clit softly, his other arm still<br />

tight around my waist.<br />

He started nibbling and licking my neck as I moved back up his length, pressing back<br />

down firmly, letting his cock fill me in a smooth quick thrust. I paused just a moment,<br />

trying something new, I closed my muscles softly squeezing his shaft. With this he<br />

growled loudly in my ear “FUCK WOMAN” his arm pulling me hard back against him. He<br />

took over, no longer content with my steady pace, he pulled his tip from me ramming it<br />

back in forcefully, my tight walls stretching around him as he slid between them. I yelped<br />

as he bumped my inner wall, whimpering as my fingers digging in to thigh more. I<br />

squeezed again, getting another loud growl and hard thrust. He closed his finger and<br />

thumb tightly around my clit pinching it as he slammed me again. His grasp on me so<br />

tight, his body already trembling against mine. The thrusts kept coming, his thick cock<br />

ramming between my walls, his fingers holding my clit tight, moving it from side to side, I<br />

wailed loudly, panting as he pushed up hard once more, his cock buried deep inside me,<br />

my walls closing tight around him again, this time involuntarily. I moaned loudly “OH<br />

GOD SIR!!!” as my muscles went tense, quivering in his arms. He bit down on my neck<br />

as he slammed me a few more times, his cock forcing it’s way between my spasming<br />

walls, another loud, deep, animalistic growl escaping him as he started to throb, filling me<br />

with his seed, his teeth still tight to my neck, arm still holding me very tight.


Once our bodies started to relax he put me on my feet again, turning in the lounge his<br />

legs spreading out along it, his back against the arm. He pulled me into his lap, cradling<br />

me in his arms kissing me deeply, as his fingers worked into my hair. He pulled his lips<br />

from mine, caressing my cheek, as he looked in to my eyes. “you know little one you are<br />

an incredible lover, you’re very observant of how I react to everything, changing things to<br />

please me even more, and you’re going to drive me quite wild if you learn any more little<br />

tricks like that one.” I giggled a little and as he held me in his arms cuddling me up<br />

relaxing, I started looking over the crowd a bit more closely, watching the other couples.<br />

“enjoying the show little one” he whispered in my ear. I turned to face him, looking him<br />

square in the eye. “You Sir, are a fucking giant.” He looked a bit surprised and then<br />

laughed very loudly, pulling me to his lips kissing me. He wrapped his fingers in my hair,<br />

enjoying my mouth, and as he pulled away he smiled into my eyes chuckling a bit more.<br />

“I’m so very glad you’re amused Sir, I had nothing to compare to before you know, but<br />

looking around the room, it’s true you’re a fucking giant.” He laughed again “I may be a<br />

bit above average little one.” He smiled very wide giving me a sly wink. “A bit Sir?” he<br />

chuckled even more “God I love you woman,” he whispered softly in my ear.<br />

More people were standing around now, visiting as others played around them. I looked<br />

Sir in the eye, my hand brushing over his chest softly. I wasn’t sure the time, but I<br />

suspected it was getting late. “Sir?” I asked, he smiled as he looked in to my eyes.<br />

“Yes, little one?” “Do we have time for another event Sir, or will be leaving soon?” “I’m<br />

not sure little one, what did you have in mind?” I smiled as I looked up at him, “I thought<br />

perhaps I could practice what I learned on Monday Sir, if it would please you?” “Oh, I’m<br />

certain we can make time for that, and it would please me a great deal little one.” I<br />

smiled up at him starting to slip from his arms, and he wrapped me up tight holding me,<br />

“Little one?” “Yes Sir?” I asked waiting, “You are far braver than I ever expected you to<br />

be, you’ve taken me by surprise repeatedly since we met and you continually amaze me,<br />

and I thought you should know.” “Sir?” I waited again, “Yes little one?” he answered<br />

looking in to my eyes. “I’m not brave Sir, I have honestly been near terrified, since I<br />

introduced myself Saturday evening. I’ve been quite insecure, and second guessing<br />

everything I’ve said and done the entire time as well. It’s just that for some reason, that I<br />

cannot quite explain Sir, I have a very deep desire, and need to please you, and things<br />

that I would normally not do, I will for you, because the desire to please you is actually<br />

greater than the fear of doing whatever it may be.<br />

”He smiled very big, caressing my cheek softly again, looking deep into my eyes. “Didn’t<br />

anyone ever tell you little one, that’s what bravery is, it’s not the lack of fear little one, it’s<br />

doing things despite the fear.”


He let me slip from his lap this time, and he turned on the lounge placing his feet on the<br />

ground again, opening his legs for me. I kissed him against the lips softly, looking in to<br />

his eyes, as he leaned back making himself comfortable. He watched as I went to my<br />

knees between his legs, groaning softly as I did. I slid my hands up his inner thighs as I<br />

started to lean in, my right hand wrapping around his base firmly as I moved in just a bit<br />

more. I looked up into his eyes, which were watching me intently, whispering in a very<br />

breathy voice, “I love you Sir” the warm air from my mouth brushing against his soft skin.<br />

He shivered just a little whispering back “Good god.” My hand started moving up his<br />

shaft slowly, holding him tight enough to drag his soft skin along his hard shaft with it as it<br />

moved to the tip. A soft smile formed on my lips as I slid my tongue from between them,<br />

dragging it slowly across his balls as my hand worked back down to his base. He let out<br />

a deep groan as I pulled one of his balls between my lips very carefully, just holding it in<br />

my warm mouth a moment as my hand started to move back to his tip. I released the<br />

first, moving to the other, pulling it in just as carefully, my hand moving back down to his<br />

base, giving a soft squeeze. Another loud groan his hands slipping into my hair, grasping<br />

it tightly.<br />

I sighed softly as his hands tangled in my hair, the breath from my lips against his skin<br />

causing him to shiver once more. I moved up just a bit slipping my tongue around his tip<br />

eagerly, then kissing down his shaft to my hand, as it stroked him keeping its firm grip<br />

around him. I continued to play taking my time, and by his little twitches and noises he<br />

was enjoying it very much. My tongue glided softly over his skin, then around the tip<br />

once more. I kept my eyes on him as I toyed with him, enjoying the feel of his soft skin,<br />

how hard he was in my hand, how our combined taste lingered on him, and it’s quite<br />

good I that I watched him so closely actually because we had gathered quite the crowd<br />

of on lookers.<br />

was still effective, I twisted it gently up and down his shaft, as I slipped my lips over his<br />

tip, pulling it into my mouth working my way down to my hand. I moaned around him<br />

once I had him as deep as I could comfortably take him, the vibrations from my mouth<br />

running through him. He growled loudly “FUCK WOMAN!” I closed my mouth a little<br />

tighter as I slid my lips back to his tip nice and slow, savouring every bit of him. I twirled<br />

my tongue around his tip once more, before pulling him back in, I let my lips hold him<br />

tightly as they moved down his length quickly this time, the warmth of my mouth<br />

wrapping him up, I moaned again as I held him deep between my lips, and he groaned<br />

loudly his hips starting to move softly against my hand and mouth. I moved my other<br />

hand under my chin, holding his balls softly as my head and hand started to thrust<br />

together, my hand still twisting softly as it moved, both holding tight around him. He<br />

leaned back against the lounge, groaning again, the look on his face amazing to me. I<br />

could feel his pulse running through his shaft, and felt as it grew just a bit more, getting<br />

thicker between my lips.


I tightened my grip with everything a bit more, making a bit smaller hole for him to slide<br />

between, my head bobbing now, quickly moving over his length, pulling him in again and<br />

again. He growled again, loud and long, his body tensing, and this time he did not try<br />

and pull me off him, instead he held me in place, as he started to cum, coating my<br />

tongue and throat with his seed. I held him in my warm, moist, mouth till he was ready.<br />

He looked in to my eyes now “Fuck me woman you can do amazing things with your<br />

mouth.” I blushed softly as he pulled me off him, swallowing and licking my lips my eyes<br />

still on him.<br />

He pulled his fingers from my hair grabbing my wrists helping me from the floor and back<br />

to his lap, this time pulling me onto him facing him, I put my legs around him wrapping<br />

him up tight with them, followed by my arms. It was then that I got a glimpse of the<br />

crowd that had gathered. Apparently, we were the last couple to finish up, I quickly put<br />

my face against his shoulder hiding, and he chuckled softly. He leaned in whispering in<br />

my ear “you should not be hiding little one, you put on the best show of the night.” I<br />

blushed further, and he moved a hand under my chin, “no little one I will not allow you to<br />

hide now, you’ve done so well all night” and he pulled my head back lifting my face to<br />

look in to his eyes. He spoke again although I don’t think it was for me even though<br />

directed to me. “Little one, I’m pretty certain your mouth may be the death of me, and I<br />

will die a very happy man.” My face turned bright red once again, and I knew he would<br />

not let me hide against his shoulder but I hoped to hide a bit by kissing him instead. I<br />

caught a most unhappy glare from his friend Ruby, as I leaned in, I took his lips greedily,<br />

kissing him passionately, letting my tongue twist eagerly around his. I suspect he was<br />

fully aware of my plan however he allowed it, moving his hand to the back of my head,<br />

holding it tightly. I moaned around his lips moving a hand to his cheek, and as we parted<br />

lips I whispered a soft “I love you,” in his ear, “I love you very much little one, thank you<br />

for a fabulous evening.” I opened my eyes to find Ruby in ear shot of us with a most<br />

unpleasant look on her face. “Oh, that Sir was my pleasure.”<br />

Now that we were relaxing a few more people came by to speak with Sir. It would seem<br />

he’s quite popular. As he was talking to an older gentleman, his eye caught my fingertips<br />

brushing against the thin leather necklace once more. When the gentleman wandered<br />

off he eyed me “Ready for that to come off now little one? You’ll be safe at this hour of<br />

the party.” I looked at him a moment before replying “No Sir, not particularly, I rather<br />

enjoy it to be honest, however I have kept a very tall, dark, handsome, highly motivated<br />

man, who likes to win, out far past a reasonable hour, on account of he wakes at way to<br />

fucking early am.” I leaned forward, positioning my neck so he could remove the small<br />

leather band. “Perhaps someday we’ll find something a bit more official for you, in the<br />

future, little one and for the record, I really enjoy you wearing it.” He slipped it from my<br />

neck and we stood and dressed.


He took my hand and we wandered, finding William and Vivian. “Thank you both for the<br />

invitation we’ve had a fabulous night.” Sir said taking William’s hand firmly, and then<br />

hugging Vivian tight. “We are quite pleased to see you out again Zachary.” William said,<br />

as Vivian pulled me in for a tight hug “Yes we are, and quite pleased to see you in such<br />

beautiful company as well, you take very good care of her Zachary.” She said letting me<br />

go giving him a stern look. Sir smiled very wide to this “Oh I intend to,” he said softly<br />

wrapping his arm around my waist and leading me to the door. “Do we need to stop for<br />

food little one? Are you hungry?” “No Sir it’s far too late, I’m fine thank you.” We chatted<br />

as he drove, and when we arrived he walked me to my door pulling me to his chest.<br />

“Tonight, was absolutely amazing little one thank you, and see I told you, you’d be the<br />

envy of every woman that saw you.” I smiled softly touching his cheek “Well Ruby at the<br />

very least.” I said giggling a little, he laughed quite loudly to this “indeed, sweet dreams<br />

my little one, I’ll speak with you very soon, and I love you very much.” He kissed me<br />

now, very tender and soft his lips just brushing against mine, and he closed his eyes,<br />

which was completely new. Only for a moment and a little noise escaped him as he<br />

leaned back looking me in the eye. “I love you very much as well Sir, and I hope you rest<br />

well even if it’s short, and I’m very much looking forward to talking to you soon.” He<br />

smiled softly pressing his lips to my cheek just as soft, letting me go. I went in locking<br />

the door behind me, and I heard him heading down the stairs.<br />

“Tonight, was absolutely amazing little one thank you,<br />

and see i told you, you'd be the envy of every woman<br />

that saw you”


Simply online….<br />

Common Online Myths<br />

One thing that has become very apparent to me is the amount of common online myths<br />

associated with Ds or BDSM. Some of them annoy the hell out of me, some of them want<br />

to make me cringe. But I will attempt to go through some of the myths/beliefs that for<br />

some reason are very prevalent online, and hopefully explain why they do not apply to<br />

me.<br />

I am a Dom/Master, Hear me Roar<br />

Sending an instant message to me on ICQ or other, and claiming to be a Dom, and<br />

expecting instant respect. I have to ask. Why??? Anyone can cap their name, or type in<br />

all caps, it doesn't make them a Dom, it doesn't even make them an adult. It simply, till<br />

proven otherwise, makes them someone with an ISP, ICQ, and some small ability to<br />

type. I say small ability, because most of those who seem to use this method replace you<br />

with u, I see with IC, etc. Shouting face to face wouldn't make you a Dom, so why do<br />

people think the online equivalent makes them a Dom online. It doesn't. I could easily<br />

walk into a chat room with my name capped and claim to<br />

be a Domme, it wouldn't make me one, but the odds are I<br />

could pull it off better than most who contact me this way.<br />

Name Calling


"kneel, bitch."<br />

I don't understand what it is that would make someone think that greeting a total stranger<br />

as bitch, whore, slut etc would make them welcome. Call me that to my face, and I'll<br />

probably slap you, or throw a drink over you. Its not polite, its out right rude. I haven't<br />

acted in any way shape or form that warrants such words being thrown at me. I am<br />

human, not canine, so the term bitch doesn't apply to me. I am not a prostitute, so the<br />

term whore doesn't apply to me. I do not and never have slept around, so the term slut<br />

doesn't apply to me. The ONLY person who ever has the right to call me by those names<br />

is my Master. That is His right, something we have agreed upon in long discussion<br />

before the collar ever went on, and never something He would call me in public.<br />

Kneel and Worship Me<br />

The other part of the 'kneel, bitch' message. Submission isn't something that is given<br />

away to some stranger on ICQ. I am not saying (before anyone emails me about this)<br />

that online Ds collars mean nothing, what I am trying to say is this. Be it online or in real<br />

life, submission isn't given away to a complete stranger just because He greets you by<br />

the phrase kneel bitch/slut etc. You talk,<br />

perhaps for many months, perhaps only a few days, but something is felt within the<br />

submissive, a need, a desire to submit to this one. There are those we can meet,<br />

normally face to face, where this submission is felt instantly. From those I have spoken to<br />

this is RARE. And even when felt it is simply not wise to instantly submit to that person.<br />

Kneel to show respect if that is something you feel towards them, kneel and beg for a<br />

collar from a stranger, not wise. Potentially dangerous, in fact. So contacting someone on<br />

ICQ or in a Chat room and expecting them to kneel instantly to you, is a joke. At least to<br />

me.<br />

You are not worthy<br />

Of what?<br />

And Why?<br />

And who are you to judge me?


ahhhh yes, of course, they mean of their presence online. This one always makes me<br />

laugh. Yes there are some submissives that serve their Dom/mes out of a feeling of not<br />

being worth anything. I am not one of them. I am very proud of being strong enough to<br />

admit that I am submissive to my Master. My Master is very proud of me. Yes some subs<br />

are into humiliation, I am not. Its not something that is written in stone that all subs must<br />

enjoy. We are NOT all alike, that is part of being Human.<br />

If you are a submissive You MUST Obey Me<br />

I have one question to ask about this..<br />

WHY???<br />

I have read everything I can (though by no means as much as some people), talk to as<br />

many people who live this way as I can possibly talk to, and I have to find this mysterious<br />

contract that I am supposed to have signed somewhere down the line that says I have to<br />

obey everyone who claims to be a Dom. So I have come to the conclusion it doesn't<br />

exist. A submissive obeys the Man or Woman He or She is collared to, or has been told<br />

to obey by his or her Master or Mistress, if their lifestyle includes temporarily extending<br />

that obedience to another. And not all Ds collars/relationships include this. You cannot<br />

command a submissive that is in someone else's collar without at the very very least,<br />

permission from that subs Master/Mistress, it would be like taking someones car without<br />

permission. Its a form of Theft, and shows extreme lack of respect for the collar.<br />

I am Your Masters Master<br />

Yes, I have actually had some people claim this. And after I clean up the coffee, juice etc<br />

and stop choking, my normal response is this. My Master does not have a Master, He<br />

has never been a sub, never worn a collar, and I don't appreciate liars. Yes, there are<br />

those Dom/mes that have at one time or another been a submissive, or slave.<br />

Sometimes it is because this is how they learned. (I have been told this was in some<br />

ways common in the Old Guard and Leather brigade) That Dom/me may still have a lot<br />

of respect for the person they were once collared to, but I have yet to hear them still call<br />

that person Master. I am not saying it doesn't happen, simply that I have never come<br />

across it. My Master didn't learn that way, so does not have a Master.


All Masters share their subs/slaves<br />

WRONG!<br />

Some do , some don't. Some Ds couples are Monogamous, they don't play with others,<br />

or serve others. Some are Poly, it is something the couple discuss before the collar ever<br />

goes on. And they don't normally share with complete strangers. Would you give your<br />

brand new, prized sports car away to a complete stranger off the street to drive away<br />

with it..?? If the answer is yes, I would truly suggest that you either have more money<br />

than sense, or you simply don't care what happens to it. If you don't care, why bother<br />

having it in the first place.?<br />

Real Slaves don't have limits<br />

Why?<br />

And what do you define as limits?<br />

I am a slave, my Masters slave. I have limits. What makes me a slave is my Masters<br />

wish. Not someone else's beliefs, rules or regulations. I have never met someone who<br />

doesn't have some form of limits, what often seems to happen is the sub finds a Dom<br />

whose limits match their own, or close enough that there is not a problem.<br />

Ds = S&M<br />

I think this is one of the most misunderstood things online. That being involved in Ds<br />

means I must enjoy pain. It doesn't mean that at all. It doesn't mean there isn't any pain<br />

in our relationship, only that its not<br />

the b all and end all of what we do. My Master doesn't like inflicting pain, and I am not<br />

overly into receiving pain, so it works out very well for us. Ds = Dominance and<br />

submission S&M = Sadism and Masochism. The Giving and receiving of pain for<br />

pleasure of one or both. No where does it say that Ds has to include S&M or the S&M<br />

has to mean a Ds relationship.<br />

Sub/Slave=weak/fearful


submissive doesn't mean doormat. It takes a great amount of courage to admit you feel<br />

submissive to someone, and to be willing to take that first and subsequent steps into this<br />

life. Either in play to 24/7 or<br />

anything in between. My Master and I talked long and hard about doing this. I wasn't<br />

forced, coerced, threatened into it. And He doesn't want a 'yes Master, anything you say<br />

Master' He wants a strong confident woman that just happens to be submissive to Him.<br />

This seems to surprise some of the 'Doms' online when they are politely told to sod off<br />

when they have tried to order me around.<br />

There are many more<br />

online myths, more than I<br />

have had the chance to<br />

write about yet, but I am<br />

sure I will sooner or later.<br />

What saddens me is those<br />

that actually think this is<br />

the Way it is in Real Life.<br />

That they can, after<br />

proclaiming themselves a Dom, walk up to any sub, insult her, slap her or order her<br />

around. It takes the whole idea of Consent out of Ds , and puts it in the reams of abuse.<br />

When you tell them this, they get astounded, often replying with the.."But subs like to be<br />

abused don't they, thats what this is all about..isn't it" And the fact they truly don't get it, is<br />

the saddest thing of all. There are some wonderful people online, that don't act like this at<br />

all. That have helped me learn, encouraged me, and in some rare cases become very<br />

good friends. So before anyone thinks I have a problem with online, I don't, just with<br />

some of the myths here.


Simply online….


Online vs. Real Life D/s<br />

Once upon a time I lived in a world online. Where what happened to me, online seemed<br />

to be my real life. However, I was awakened by a Dominant and brought to real life. I am<br />

very thankful that he took me and showed me real life Dominance and submission.<br />

The road to real life has not been very fun always. It has been hard work and lots of hurts<br />

have happened but even with those real life hurts there still healing, I would never go<br />

back to the online fantasy world.<br />

Online is intense but not real. Real life is intense and effects are lasting. Real life is like<br />

seeing things in a full spectrum of colour and online is like seeing things only in Black<br />

and White.<br />

The same things that thrilled me in an online setting don't now that I have experienced<br />

them real life. There are things online I wanted so much, that I thought I would love that I<br />

hate now. I set things as online limits that in real life were amazing, once I encountered<br />

them.<br />

Online is a Fantasy. Real life is experiencing and living.<br />

An online collar is meaningful and shows some sense of ownership, but it cannot fully do<br />

the job a real life ownership based relationship does. Once that real life collar is placed<br />

around the neck of the submissive - it changes things forever. Submissive say that they<br />

are owned mind, soul, heart and body online but really the only way that is possible is by<br />

living D/s real life. So that collar in real life is like a capturing of so much more then words<br />

can express online. It is feeling that are shared between the Dominant and submissive<br />

real life as they look into each others eyes, as the fingers sliding the collar around the<br />

submissives neck touch her and touch her in ways that online cannot.<br />

Punishment is hard to do. It is something that is hard to figure out what the punishment<br />

should be and what is the best way for the submissive to learn from this punishment. It<br />

might take a Dominant one hour or several days to think of a "good" punishment that will<br />

help the submissive learn from her mistakes as well not harm her emotionally or<br />

mentally.


Online, Long Distant Relationship, and 24/7 punishments are very different. An<br />

assignment is given to a submissive - it is to write a story. The submissive forgets - just<br />

totally blows it off, how this punishment is handled in each setting is different.<br />

In all settings the assignment should be made up or done as soon as possible. The<br />

Dominant should talk to the submissive to find out why she did not do it and explain how<br />

prevent that from happening in the future and then what will be done to make it right.<br />

If the Dominant and submissive are 24/7, the Dominant might bind the submissive and<br />

leave her in her binds for 20 to 40 minutes to think about what she has done. And then<br />

come in and talk to her about how she could prevent it in the future and what will be done<br />

to make it right. The punishment then could be that the submissive has a switch used on<br />

her and has to say "I will not forget my Master's orders, Thank You, may I have another,<br />

Master?" between each slap of the switch.<br />

In a LDR, the Dominant could have the submissive kneeling for 20 minutes before he<br />

calls and then talks to her about how she can prevent this from happening again and<br />

what her punishment will be. One appropriate punishment for forgetting the Dominants<br />

order would be making the submissive keep a diary of each day - each hour of each day<br />

for a week. This would have the submissive thinking of her Master more, insuring that<br />

every hour of the day she is thinking of him and not forgetting orders, wishes, and/or<br />

requests that he wants. It will show her how important her Master and his orders are for<br />

her as a submissive.<br />

Online is a fantasy land so the punishment will be just online - in an online persona using<br />

words that just effect the moment in fantasy but not real life.<br />

Orders can be given in all settings also. Orders in 24/7 Dominance and submissive effect<br />

real life always. It covers all aspects of the Dominance and submisisves lives. It requires<br />

the Dominant to have total control real life, where online and in LDR that is impossible.<br />

LDR relationship can be a real life D/s experience. The small reality-based bits and<br />

pieces of life can be shared with the Dominant in a LDR as well as a 24/7 that will give<br />

the Dominant control. The submissive can inform the Dominant of her day or routine in<br />

her life, such as when she is going to the grocery store, going to get her hair done, and/<br />

or going to lunch with a friend. Informing the Dominant of these things before they<br />

happen so he can be aware and can have a say. The dominant expects to be told of<br />

these things then and can make additions to them or comments of them.


Such as she is going to the store and he is wanting her to eat more healthy so he has<br />

her add more vegetables to her diet by having her buy more while at the store, if she is<br />

going to get her hair done he then can say he wants it I certain style, and if going to<br />

lunch with a friend maybe he wants her to wear a dress instead of pants - all those things<br />

are given to the Dominant as areas he can control from a long distance. These are not<br />

"big" things, they are everyday things that the submissive is giving up control and the<br />

Dominant is taking them and the responsibilities that go along with them.<br />

A LDR and 24/7 D/s relationship is not just about controlling the submissive in the fun<br />

kinky things. (One thing that is evident and different from online).<br />

Just because people live in the online fantasy land does not make them bad or wrong, it<br />

is just that I do not want to live there anymore. I have experienced real life and I suggest<br />

all that live online try D/s real life. Open your lives up to a way of feeling truly alive and<br />

free.<br />

© within Reality: danae 2000 - all rights reserved


Our New look VIP section.<br />

This section will introduce<br />

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community information


http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/<br />

Blue%20Hawaii/109/183/23


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Prestigious%20Peace/85/146/22


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Useful Links<br />

like the web? Follow these crumbs for fun and<br />

information.<br />

Blogs:<br />

http://flame-darkandlight.blogspot.co.uk/<br />

http://www.pdrelate.co.uk<br />

http://www.pdrelate.com<br />

ACES Group Joiner URL (copy & paste into local chat then click from chat history to<br />

JOIN ACES) :<br />

secondlife:///app/group/827673f4-77d0-1536-7b07-106556047025/about<br />

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ACES Google calendar:<br />

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ACES in FetLife:<br />

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D/s Discussions Group;<br />

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Gallery<br />

Editor’s Picks<br />

Nothing is more<br />

evocative or inspiring to<br />

me than art. I often find<br />

one of the most<br />

satisfying parts of editing<br />

this magazine is finding<br />

the art that brings life to<br />

the heartbeat of the<br />

words.<br />

Join me as i present<br />

some of the most<br />

wonderful imagery<br />

available, from the most<br />

sensual of minds.<br />

Amazing art by a myriad of talent.


Coming up…<br />

June<br />

June<br />

“Dominance”<br />

Fourth in the series of<br />

monologues, written by<br />

the amazing Sir Arithon.<br />

D/shion<br />

Another look into the D/s<br />

world of fashion with<br />

A.sands<br />

June Edition<br />

Topic - LIVING D/s, the<br />

practical side, the how,<br />

the why, the why not….<br />

June<br />

Thrown to the floor<br />

Articles by Sir Arithon,<br />

delivered in his unique<br />

Dominant style.<br />

June<br />

Editor’s Picks<br />

A trip into the naughty<br />

mind of flame and her<br />

choice of erotic art.<br />

VIP Venue’s<br />

Information and<br />

advertisement for venues<br />

and Shops online<br />

Simply Online<br />

Specific content for those<br />

of the lifestyle who only<br />

practice in Second life or<br />

other online platforms.


Produced by<br />

Flame Jie, Editor in Chief<br />

& Sir Arithon, Associate Editor<br />

The content on the magazine and its website are made available on the terms<br />

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• are not responsible in any way for the actions or results taken any person,<br />

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