Upbringing of Children

marry anyway or, even worse, live together in *ar\m. As long as the
marriage would be valid Isl\mically, parents in these situations should
come to a compromise with their children, agreeing to give the
wedding their blessings if the child and their spouse will live by the
guidance of Isl\m. This is sometimes the only way to prevent losing
one’s child and prevent them from losing their D|n. While clearly a
difficult proposition for a parent to concede to, taking this step for the
sake of All\h would reap one enormous rewards in this world and the
next.
Parting Advice
The final phase of a parent’s relationship with their child is once their
own child has married. Parents need to be aware of how their
behaviour must now be towards the child and his/her spouse.
While many parents feel the need to continually remind the married
offspring that they are their parents by asserting authority over them
and their family, the D|n insists that they are given their own space to
develop and make decisions. This is the reason the wife has the Isl\mic
right to ask for accommodation separate from her in-laws’ (provided
the husband can afford it or can make arrangements for it, otherwise
she still has a right to a room where she will be afforded full privacy).
Parents must respect these needs of the newly-weds and be supportive
friends for them now, rather than prying burdens.
The in-laws (especially mothers-in-law) must understand that
daughter-in-law is not another word for slave of the family. Allow the
husband and wife to develop a good, strong relationship so that they
form a healthy, loving family unit towards you as parents and towards
your grandchildren. Do not place the new and still unstable
relationship under undue stress by being overbearing.
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