Get Out! GAY Magazine – Issue 328– August 9, 2017

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BY EILEEN SHAPIRO CELEBRITY CORRESPONDENT Jared and David I met Jared and David at this year’s New York Gay Pride as they modeled shirtless in their underwear. I soon found out that they were a couple with a fascinating story as to how and why their relationship has lasted in a world where they very often don’t. Both work as models, dancers and in the bar industry, and both are exposed to the gay nightlife that encompasses us all. Here is their story. How and when did you meet? Jared: We met at G Lounge, now REBAR where I’m sure many gay couples have met. David was working as a server there, and I was go-go dancing occasionally. He saw me dancing one night and started lightly flirting with me by smiling at me and bringing me Blow Pops or Ring Pops on the nights when I worked, which I thought was adorable. One night, the magic finally sparked, and we felt that immediate connection when we kissed. I invited him to come with some friends and me to a dance party after work, and that kicked off the start of our romance. David: Ha! I had my eye on that booty long before we met. LOL. I was serving cocktails at G Lounge, and he was dancing. I used to just stand a few feet away from his box while he was dancing and just stare, never really saying much; that’s probably why he paid little attention to me. If he had, this relationship would have started sooner. But yes, I always brought candy to work for the bartenders and go-go boys, and I’d usually save the Ring Pops for him. Then one day, that one kiss started something pretty damn amazing! You two have a special kind of relationship. Can you explain it? David: This definitely is one of the most unconventional relationships I’ve ever been in, but honestly, also the best. Every open relationship is created different. In the beginning, I didn’t know if I even wanted an open relationship. My friends even asked me what I was doing, because I had never been that type of person before. But Jared had a lot of patience and gave me room to figure that out for myself. We spent a lot of time expressing our needs and desires, and I’m very happy we were able to find a way that worked for us. We set up boundaries based on where one of us might feel uncomfortable, but we were open to changing those as well as we learned more about ourselves and each other. Mostly, we like to have fun, enjoy life and see each other happy. We love experiencing new things together, and we don’t mind testing the waters to see what works and what doesn’t.
Jared: Our relationship had a very unusual start. We were both in relationships at the time. David was ending one, and I was still very much in an open relationship with Seth Fornea. As his relationship ended, ours evolved into somewhat of a throuple with my partner at the time, but I think what we really became was just one big family. There were a lot of conversations had, of course. But they were honest conversations with loving listeners. Early on, when David and I first started seeing each other, Seth pulled him aside and said, “Thank you for making Jared so happy.” We all still live together, love and support each other. It’s really a very healthy situation. Why and how does it work for you? Jared: The big thing that I think a lot of people don’t realize is that open relationships aren’t really that different from monogamous ones. They both work and don’t work for many of the same reasons. I think that for me, it has worked first and foremost because I really had to realize that an open relationship is what I wanted. And the main reason for that was because I wanted a style of relationship where my partner and I could feel completely comfortable being honest with each other about our sexual desires without feeling uncomfortable or needing to bend the truth, lie or cheat. I think a lot of relationships don’t work because people aren’t honest with themselves first or haven’t even bothered to think about what they really want, and just let society dictate to them how their relationship should be defined. For David and I, we have our own rules, and we have built trust for each other. And honestly, there have been times when we thought it might not work between us, that we had run up against an unresolvable difference or let emotions flare up and get the best of us. But when we took a little time to empathize and learn from each other, we found our way back and were stronger because of it. David: In short, it works because we want it to! And we are willing to work with each other. Of course, we have the love and respect and communication. But we both want to help each other to grow and make positive changes, as a couple and as individuals. Progressing in life and learning to better oneself and each other is special, and that’s what we have, and that’s why it works. Jared: Oh! And you can’t leave out nonverbal communication. One of the early things that we both loved about each other was that we are both instinctively very physically affectionate people. I never get tired of him coming over to give me a kiss on the cheek or even just to lean on me. That, and the sex is out of this world! You also sometimes work together. How does that affect your home life? Jared: We really enjoy working together when we get the opportunity, usually go-go dancing, hosting events or brand promotions, which is fun work to do together. Overall, I think that the effect is positive and brings us closer together. And when all three of us get to travel together for work, we have a BLAST! David: We have a lot of fun working together—all of us. We tend to stay away from drama and keep it positive. We definitely have our fair share of disagreements, but we keep that home, no matter what. Some producers won’t hire couples simply because of drama they could bring. That’s not us. On the other hand, we’ve had some wild experiences in the past two years, especially when we travel to new places together. Most not PG rated. Is there ever jealousy involved? Jared: I’m not really a very jealous person in general. I’m genuinely happy for my partner to succeed and want to help him if I can. A win for him is a win for us. If you are referring to our openness, generally no. I want my partner to have an amazing life full of diverse experiences. There have been a few times when one of us felt a little jealousy, but we found it really wasn’t so much about being jealous as it was about expressing a need for other’s attention and affection. It has happened often enough that we use a code word now to quickly and discreetly express to each other that we need to have a little alone time, away from others, to show each other a some extra TLC.
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Page 14 and 15: David: I occasionally was a jealous
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Get Out! GAY Magazine – Issue 328– August 9, 2017

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