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Keeping in Touch<br />
Telephones<br />
Ode to an old friend? At the mercy of a notorious foe? Succumbing to psychotic mood wings?<br />
Aesthetically unattractive yet linguistically talented in four idioms. Undependable, however<br />
indispensable. Our only link to Western civilization.<br />
No matter in which language: telephone, el telefono, la telephone, hatelefone—an overseas<br />
student must realize that there is no evading the use of this traumatizing apparatus. I<br />
would refer to it as the “idiot box” but my parents have reserved that title for the<br />
television. You’ll notice the parallel between telephone and television in that they both<br />
cause parents heartache. Also, they both begin with “tele.”<br />
Many a night students can be seen in the phone room in Resnick 5 as late as 4:00 in the morning<br />
punching, kicking and cursing phones because there’s an important call coming in from<br />
abroad—no doubt a girl or boy friend—and the expletive deleted phones aren’t working. How is<br />
it possible that all seven phones are broken?!? Even more discouraging are the queues, at times as<br />
long as 25 strong. And you’re number 2 6 .1 also get a real charge watching students freak out<br />
when the asimon machine is de-asimoned.<br />
If the walls in the phone rooms could talk the conversations would be enough to fill a best-seller<br />
book: The Trials and Tribulations of Telephone Calling (soon to be available in the<br />
Akademon for 85 NIS). Here are a few of the more prominent entries:<br />
“Daddy, I love you, you’re the greatest and I’m 1,000 shekels overdrawn and I... uh, Daddy?<br />
Daddy?” (No doubt a severe disconnection!)<br />
“Grandma, I know you want me to come home and go to med school like cousin Marvin but I’ve<br />
decided to join the army. Why? Because green is my favorite color."<br />
“Jon, I’m sorry but this long distance relationship can’t continue like this. I think it would be<br />
better if we could see other people . . . What do you mean you’ve already started to?”<br />
The behavior of students as they meekly converge upon the imposing blue-green phones is quite<br />
a sociological phenomenon. They no longer memorize Gafni or Nisan notes. Rather, the most<br />
rewarding challenge has become memorizing the taped recordings of the infamous “ 18”<br />
overseas operator. I know that my Arabic has certainly improved. Maybe I should stick to writing<br />
letters.<br />
Shukran!<br />
Pam Day<br />
21
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