November Arroyo 2018

KITCHEN
CONFESSIONS
Leftover Rituals
WASTE NOT (HALLOWEEN CANDY), WANT NOT
BY LESLIE BILDERBACK
Halloween has come and gone, and I still have a cupboard full of candy. You’d think
I would have gauged the trick-or-treat traffic flow of the neighborhood by now (I’ve
lived in this spot for 20 years). Our home is on the only uphill section of a very long,
very straight and otherwise flat street. Most years we get only one or two costumed hooligans
willing to huff-and-puff up a half block for free candy. One year I thought, “Eh, no one will
come — we’ll just turn our lights off.” Of course, the doorbell rang for two hours, and I had
guilt until Thanksgiving. That year I vowed to always be prepared.
Another reason I have candy left over is that, although I have an empty nest, I still buy the kids’
favorite candy. It’s not that I think that somehow the presence of said candy will conjure them back
home for the day. Rather, it is a test. Somehow, otherworldly spirits are testing me, and if I were to
forget the kids’ candy, the spirits would make the kids forget me.
I realize this is boo-nanas. But my favorite book as a kid was E.L. Konigsburg’s Jennifer, Hecate,
Macbeth, William McKinley and Me, Elizabeth, in which the protagonist, Elizabeth, must complete
several tasks on her way to becoming a real witch with powers. I view the candy as a task I must
complete to realize the full powers of motherhood. I don’t know what those powers are yet, as there
are several more tasks to complete over this holiday season. I’ll be in touch.
Anyway, this is why I have a ton of leftover candy. Again.
When the kids were little, there was no such thing as leftover candy. They ate plenty of it on
Halloween night, after a long session of bartering. Once they were in bed, it was time for us to
assess the loot and abscond with our favorites. Then, I would tuck a piece in their lunch box every
day until it was all gone. Never did I ask, “Whatever shall I do with all this leftover candy?” More
likely, the question was, “Who ate that Butterfinger I was saving?”
But things change, and now I find myself researching recipes that utilize leftover candy. The
fare is about what you’d think. Mix it into cookies. Mix it into brownies. Mix it into rice crispy
bars. Mix it into cheesecake. A lot of mixing, and not a lot of real cooking. I have even come across
several suggestions to mix all the candy together for a pie, sandwiched inside a double crust of
traditional pie dough and baked into a melty mass of diabetes on a plate. (It has been suggested by
members of this family that it doesn’t sound half bad, but I should use a crumb crust and top it with
Cool Whip.)
The issue one may have with leftover Halloween-candy recipes is that they are mostly for
chocolate candies. It’s the hard, gummy, sour and slimy candies that present the challenge. But I
have some tricks up my sleeve.
For hard and gummy candies, my most ingenious idea has been to use them in my sauce
making. Anytime your sauce calls for sugar, use some hard candies instead. Add them to the
simmering sauce, and stir them in as they dissolve. If they are sour, like Jolly Ranchers, their acidity
can really help balance a sauce. I have done this with stir-fry and satay sauces, as well as the classic
French gastrique. The other thing I do with hard candies is save them for Christmas to make
stained-glass cookies. Use your favorite sugar-cookie dough, cut out shapes, then cut out a center
hole in each shape. Lay the window “frames” on a parchment-lined baking sheet, then fill the
space with crushed hard candies. As they bake, the candy will melt and create the window “glass.”
This looks best with clear hard candies, but I’ve done it with red-and-white peppermints too.
(Although, if you received red-and-white peppermints in your trick-or-treat bag, that’s a legitimate
excuse to egg a house. That’s a worse offense than raisins.)
A quick, easy and seemingly decadent use for any and all chocolate candy bars is super-simple
microwave mousse. Use equal parts of chocolate candy and heavy cream. Melt the chocolates
slowly in the microwave, stirring until liquid and smooth, then cool for 5 minutes while whipping
38 | ARROYO | 11.18