COMIC ARITHMETIC
Arithmetic is the art or science of computing bj numbers. It is national, political, military, and commercial. It is of the highest importance to the community ; because it pre-eminently teaches us to take care of Number I. Our ministers succeed according to their knowledge of the science of numbers. Witness the skilful management of majorities of the lower house. He who understands the true art of Addition, Subtraction, Multiplication^ and Division, as here laid down, will not be considered a mere cipher in tlie world; but will, in all probability, make a considerable /^wre ; and in the figurative words of Horace, be "Dives agris dives positis in foenore nummis." Let us, therefore, under the guidance and protection of that god of honest men, the light-heeled and light-fingered Mercury, be diligent so to add to our store by subtracting from the stores of others, that we may add to our importance. Let us so multiply our resources, by encouraging dimsion among our contemporaries, that we may see their reduction in the perfection of our own practice.
Arithmetic is the art or science of computing
bj numbers. It is national, political, military,
and commercial. It is of the highest importance
to the community ; because it pre-eminently
teaches us to take care of Number I. Our ministers
succeed according to their knowledge of the
science of numbers. Witness the skilful management
of majorities of the lower house.
He who understands the true art of Addition,
Subtraction, Multiplication^ and Division, as here
laid down, will not be considered a mere cipher in
tlie world; but will, in all probability, make a
considerable /^wre ; and in the figurative words of
Horace, be "Dives agris dives positis in foenore
nummis."
Let us, therefore, under the guidance and protection
of that god of honest men, the light-heeled
and light-fingered Mercury, be diligent so to add
to our store by subtracting from the stores of
others, that we may add to our importance. Let
us so multiply our resources, by encouraging dimsion
among our contemporaries, that we may see
their reduction in the perfection of our own practice.
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ASSURANCE—INSURANCE. 147<br />
will carry a man further than even a stock of<br />
money, wit, or learning. The brazen head of<br />
Friar Bacon, by which he is said to have performed<br />
such w^ondcrs, was nothing more than a typical<br />
personification of the brass, assurance, or impudence<br />
of the conjuror. The T^resent prima facio economic<br />
method is to wear a brazen face with a wooden<br />
head. Mettle, it is true, may be necessary, but<br />
" cheek" is indispensable.<br />
Modesty is an antiquated virtue, to be repudiated<br />
above all others ; and humility is only fit for<br />
charity-school boys, who learn the "catechiz."<br />
But even among these the notion of " humbly,<br />
lowly and reverendly," will soon be exploded by<br />
the music and dancing system ; the new philosophy<br />
of the times being, " Jack's as good as his master"<br />
and a " tarnation sight better ;"<br />
every one feels<br />
this assurance.<br />
Be assured, gentle readers, there is nothing like<br />
brass ;<br />
it enables a man to put his best leg forward,<br />
and a good face upon any thing. Brass is the<br />
true philosopher's stone, which turns all it touches<br />
into tin. By it the insignificant makes himself<br />
important, the empiric becomes a professor, the<br />
smatterer a proficient, the mountebank a philo-<br />
H 2
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