COMIC ARITHMETIC
Arithmetic is the art or science of computing bj numbers. It is national, political, military, and commercial. It is of the highest importance to the community ; because it pre-eminently teaches us to take care of Number I. Our ministers succeed according to their knowledge of the science of numbers. Witness the skilful management of majorities of the lower house. He who understands the true art of Addition, Subtraction, Multiplication^ and Division, as here laid down, will not be considered a mere cipher in tlie world; but will, in all probability, make a considerable /^wre ; and in the figurative words of Horace, be "Dives agris dives positis in foenore nummis." Let us, therefore, under the guidance and protection of that god of honest men, the light-heeled and light-fingered Mercury, be diligent so to add to our store by subtracting from the stores of others, that we may add to our importance. Let us so multiply our resources, by encouraging dimsion among our contemporaries, that we may see their reduction in the perfection of our own practice.
Arithmetic is the art or science of computing
bj numbers. It is national, political, military,
and commercial. It is of the highest importance
to the community ; because it pre-eminently
teaches us to take care of Number I. Our ministers
succeed according to their knowledge of the
science of numbers. Witness the skilful management
of majorities of the lower house.
He who understands the true art of Addition,
Subtraction, Multiplication^ and Division, as here
laid down, will not be considered a mere cipher in
tlie world; but will, in all probability, make a
considerable /^wre ; and in the figurative words of
Horace, be "Dives agris dives positis in foenore
nummis."
Let us, therefore, under the guidance and protection
of that god of honest men, the light-heeled
and light-fingered Mercury, be diligent so to add
to our store by subtracting from the stores of
others, that we may add to our importance. Let
us so multiply our resources, by encouraging dimsion
among our contemporaries, that we may see
their reduction in the perfection of our own practice.
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42 FIGURES FOR THE MILLION.<br />
HOURS.<br />
4. To " cat-lap," " broiled chickens," Lackadaisical<br />
Magazine, " Dry Punch," and Gazette of Fashion. . 2 J<br />
5. To the study of "cash stalking," the art of post-obits,<br />
with lessons from Professor Mceshes on the science<br />
of •' Bondology.' ' (Nociurna versate manu, versate<br />
diurna) 1<br />
6. To lounging, "dawdling," "muddling," sauntering,<br />
losing oneself in " ins and outs," " nowheres," &c. . 1§<br />
7. To dressing for dinner, to getting on a pair of boots,<br />
half an hour, swearing at coat quarter of an hour,<br />
selectingvestshalf an hour, cursing pantaloons quarter<br />
of an hour, shaving, and other unnecessaries<br />
... 2^<br />
8. To dining, wineing, brighting the eye, doubling the<br />
cape, getting half seas over, going into port instead of<br />
finding a champaign country 2<br />
9. To dressing for opera, " titavating," "bear's greasing,"<br />
curling, barbarizing, scenting, putting on opera countenance,<br />
and ogling<br />
10. To tying on stock half an hour, to putting on gloves<br />
quarter of an hour, to curling whiskers half an hour,<br />
to laying on the rouge, &c \\<br />
U. To bowing, scraping, hemming, hawing, yawning, toying,<br />
soft - sawdering, salooning, staggering, cigaring,<br />
coaching, and finishing<br />
3^<br />
12. To no one knows what— Nisi caste saltem caut^. . . 5<br />
24<br />
1 i<br />
LONG DIVISION.<br />
Long Division is so called when a long time is<br />
taken for the division of various sums, as in the<br />
case of the Deccan prize-money, or the Duke of<br />
York's debts. In these cases, various persons are
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