X YPP Book

Interview 156
• What inspires you? (Individuals, contexts, etc.)
• Why painting? (How did you discover this medium and why have you chosen it?)
Asked about when did I start drawing or painting, I always give the same answer:
early in the childhood, just like we all did. The only difference between me and
someone who is not an artist is that I never quit. For me, the secondary school
classes were always boring as hell. Drawing was the only thing that used to save
me from falling into depression. All my study books and papers were full of
drawings. Some were funny, others were violent. At some point teachers simply
got used to it.
At the age of 15–17, I started studying art more seriously. Especially animations,
comic art, caricature, and photography. In addition to drawing I started taking
a lot of pictures of my surrounds. At that time I making mostly black and white
pencil drawings on paper. These were black-and-white times: all my photographs
and drawings were monochrome. When I had to decide what to do after
finishing school, Art Academy came as an obvious choice. Everybody who knew
me where sure I was going to study art. I did not know much about installation
art or sculpture, nor did I know anything about printmaking. Although I did not
have much of the painting experience, I decided to apply for painting program.
I turned out to be the worst painter in the class. I regarded painting as ‘drawing
with brushes.’ I gradually became interested in colours and learned about how
layers of paint can turn into unpredictable surfaces. In the year 2011 Estonian Art
Academy rejected my MA applicationthe at the. For the following three years I
was working on my own, managing various painting, photography and film
projects. In 2014 I got accepted into the MA program at the Helsinki Art Academy.
That was also a start of my professional career.
I think it is the absurdity of life that has always been my main inspiration. The
world around us can be a complicated thing. It could be much better, but people
keep making the same mistakes all over again. We don’t learn from history. Our
values are extremely artificial and controversial, and our picture of the world is
sometimes incredibly poor. Growing up in post-soviet Russia and Estonia, I witnessed
a lot of depression, fear, and hopelessness. My early works were all about
people being lost in this crazy world. The main protagonists of my early cartoonish
drawings were social anti-heroes, alcoholics, bums and junkies. Later, when
my professional career started to develop, I starated witnessing a lot of absurdity
in art world as well. At first our ideas about being an artist are deeply romanticized.
Then we start encountering various uncomfortable things about the art society
and the art market. Many artists don’t talk about all that. And those who do,
have nothing going on for them. There were times I was questioning my choice
to become artist. I had no money and no hope. Although I considered making art
being the best thing in the world, I had doubts about my committing to it. However
these doubts are also the source of inspiration. I would prefer not to be too
serious in my works. There is no point in being serious in such a world with its
absurd beliefs. I am inspired by our everyday thoughts, observations, and stupid
jokes. My dissatisfaction is the main thing that keeps me doing stuff.
• Creative motifs. (What drives your creative practice? What are the topics you are
working on?)
Nowadays my main motif is the existence of an artist in the world of strict and
blind rules of capitalism. In fact half of the artists in this world seem to be thematising
the struggle against capitalism. Somehow, this world does not make artists
happy. I have witnessed a lot of insecurity among creative people. It is hard
to survive even with the ingenious ideas, unless they are practical. My favourite
motifs relate to how spirituality and money, and the will to create and the desire
for stable life crash into each other. My art arises from my personal fears and
anxieties about being an artist, and it extends into global topics such as social
traumas and anxieties, politics, poverty, love and hate.