CEAC-2020-04-April

Boiler Room Annex
The Importance of Discovering Fire
Source: engineering-humour.com/engineering-jokes.html
A scientist and an engineer were sharing a prison cell,
both sentenced to be shot at dawn. Fortunately, they came
up with a plan. As the physicist was led out to the firing
squad, the engineer set fire to a small pile of straw on the
window-ledge of their cell.
"Look!" the physicist yelled to his captors. "The prison is
burning!" The firing squad dropped their weapons and
ran to put out the conflagration. Furthermore, the Warden
decided that the scientist deserved a pardon for saving the
prison.
The next day the firing squad came for the engineer. As
you might guess, the scientist was having a much harder
time getting a large enough fire going outside the prison
to draw attention. As it happens, it wasn't until the engineer
was staring down the rifle barrels that he finally saw
enough smoke. So, as fast as he could, the engineer yelled,
"Fire!"
Solution:
P R O A D M C P A S B W
A L O N E D A I S W O O L F R A I L
S A N E R I T E M A S E A L I N D A
H I D A G O N I F T Y T H Y J O Y
N O T U S A R O T W E E R O W
A P T T A K E S I N X I I
W I N G S G E L C W A L O B A R
A D O I B M B R A V E H A L A P E
S E R F L T D A L A S A P S N I P
A M I N O A D V E R S E O S A K A
N B W I I I S O D S H Y
S I N A I S T O W I N G T E E T H
A E R Y N A Y L E T E L L R Y A N
Y E A K G B L I B Y A E E L P R E
E N N U I C O O D U O A D O P T
R A T A T T E N D S S P Y
O W N W A R E G O S K I E R E
I W O P O I M A G N A A C E A B S
R I V E R M E A L O V E R A S C O T
E N E M Y E R R S S O Y A T E E N Y
G N U D R Y W E T C R Y
The Nature of Probability
Source: engineering-humour.com/engineering-jokes.html
Every Friday afternoon, a mathematician goes down to the
bar, sits in the second-to-last seat, turns to the last seat,
which is empty, and asks a girl who isn't there if he can buy
her a drink.
The bartender, who is used to weird university types, always
shrugs but keeps quiet. But when Valentine's Day arrives, and
the mathematician makes a particularly heart-wrenching plea
into empty space, curiosity gets the better of the bartender,
and he says, “I apologize for my stupid questions, but surely
you know there is NEVER a woman sitting in that last stool.
Why do you persist in asking out empty space?”
MARCH SOLUTION
when the proper wave function will collapse and a girl might
suddenly appear there.”
The bartender raises his eyebrows. “Really? Interesting. But
couldn't you just ask one of the girls who comes here every
Friday if you could buy her a drink? Never know — she might
say yes.”
The mathematician laughs. “Yeah, right — how likely is that
to happen?”
The mathematician replies, “Well, according to quantum
physics, empty space is never truly empty. Virtual particles
come into existence and vanish all the time. You never know
Volume 85 · Number 4 | 69