Mahana Stories

Mahana
Stories of intergenerational connection
during the COVID-19 pandemic.

The name ‘Mahana’ was gifted to this kaupapa in reference to the
warmth that kaumātua and elders bring to our whānau and
communities.

The restrictions imposed on New Zealanders in response to
the COVID-19 pandemic gave many people a new
experience of social isolation. Unfortunately we know this
is a day to day reality for many older people.
With formal services suspended or fundamentally altered, and
anecdotal accounts of people increasingly reaching out to their
neighbours, we sought to understand the impact of social distancing
on intergenerational connection, as well as the roles older and
younger people have been playing in supporting each other.
The stories that follow were developed alongside and based on the
accounts of those who generously shared their experiences and
perspectives with us - young and old, from diverse backgrounds and living
in a range of situations and locations across Aotearoa / New Zealand.
They should not be thought of as individual stories but anonymised
narratives which aim to shine a light on the experiences of those we spoke
to, and what was important to them during this time.
Through sharing these stories and insights, we hope to bring some less
frequently heard voices to the conversation about how we can move
forward better together, whatever the future may hold and whatever your
role might be in making this a reality.
In the words of one of our co-designers:
'It's about moving towards each other...having
the conversations and telling the stories'
For further information on this project, or to explore the implications of what we’ve
heard for your particular context, please contact emily.preston@innovationunit.org

Whose stories are these?
What can we learn from them?
Each of the stories in this pack represent a group of people who spoke to
us. They are not intended to represent the experience of all New
Zealanders. They do however raise questions about how we build,
support and value intergenerational connection and what we might do
differently whatever our role or interest in this area.
John’s story draws on conversations with older
people living active, connected, independent lives
in urban environments. While comfortable
connecting online, they found lockdown had a
substantial impact on their social connectedness,
taking away access to the places and spaces where
they found connection.
How might we enable places and spaces of safe
connection during a time of pandemic?
Nikau’s story draws on conversations with a
diverse group of rangatahi / young people and
those working closely with young people across
Aotearoa / New Zealand.
How might we acknowledge the power and
encourage the development of ‘grandparent’
relationships - biological or not?
Aroha’s story draws on conversations we had with
wahine and tāne in rural communities with strong
community responses to COVID19. These mostly
younger people mobilised their communities to
quickly and effectively pool available resources and
take care of those most vulnerable to the virus
How might communities be supported and
resourced to respond to the needs of their members
in a way that works for them?

Peter & Susan’s story draws on conversations with
older people living in their own homes in towns and
cities across Aotearoa / New Zealand. These were
people who were generally fit and active and
either had strong relationships with neighbours or
built neighbourhood connections during lockdown.
How might we sustain the desire, confidence and
space to reach out and connect as life returns to its
normal pace?
Pat & Chris’ story draws on conversations with older
people from across New Zealand who are living in
their own homes while accessing services to support
their independence, as well as those who provided
informal services to older people over lockdown.
What additional supports made available during
lockdown led to additional positive impact, and how
might we sustain / amplify these?
Ramesh’s story draws on conversations with elders
from the Hindu community in Auckland relating to
their own experiences and those of the wider
community.
How might we ensure that information, services and
support are reaching people who do not have
access to digital channels, speak languages other
than English or have other accessibility needs?
Interviews and codesign sessions were led by Emily Preston and Ezekiel Raui
Illustrations by Carol Green.

I’ve always been active socially - I
live in the city so there’s always
something going on and I have a
good circle of friends of all ages.
When lockdown hit I set up online
activities so we could still connect. It
was fine - I’m perfectly able to use
the technology and it wasn’t too
strange once we all got used to it.
John
As the weeks went on I found myself
missing people, physical contact. I
was craving real connection. Zoom is
fine, but it didn’t quite do the job.
One day I decided I had to do
something so I went for a drive -
further than I was supposed to but I
really felt I had to. I bumped into
someone I knew and had a bit of a
chat at the supermarket. That made
a big difference for me.
Inner city living doesn’t
encourage connection,
Living in an apartment you have all
the security but you can’t bump into
people. It’s very isolating if you’re not
going out. All the places I would
usually connect with like-minded
people were closed - the theatres, art
galleries etc.
Going back into lockdown was
even harder. We’d just started to
get back to normal and it was a
shock, especially because we were
separated from the rest of the
country so that feels very different.
I wonder about how we can use
those places that became hubs for
us - the ‘essential’ places as a point
of connection. You heard about
people putting postcards into
neighbours’ letterboxes or having
beers at the end of their driveways
but what about those people who
don’t have neighbours? Or
driveways? We’re still going to the
supermarket at least.

What can we take from this story?
Reflections:
- Intergenerational connections, like most relationships, are often
founded on shared interests. Places and spaces which attract
like-minded people are important in keeping people connected
- While online connection can be helpful, it is not sufficient for many
people to avoid feeling isolated. This is true even for those people with
the skills to use it effectively.
- We know housing design has a significant impact on social
connectedness. This was exacerbated during lockdown where
incidental or passing connections were especially important.
What questions does this raise for our approach to pandemics?
- If social isolation is a strong enough driver to cause people to go
against guidance they both understand and agree with, how might
we acknowledge and meet this basic human need?
- How might we enable places and spaces of connection to be created
or maintained throughout a pandemic?
- Where people live without whānau, neighbours, and out of sight of
‘services,’ how might we ensure they are visible and supported?
What questions does this raise for a more connected future?
How might we...
- create more spaces where older and younger people come together
organically and can connect around shared interests?
- ensure connection, as well as security, is considered when designing
housing, particularly housing for older people?
- enable people to connect organically, in spite of spaces and places
which are not designed for connection.

My grandparents are really special to
me. I’ve always been able to talk to
them about anything and they gave
me somewhere I could learn and
grow, especially when things weren’t
great at home.
When uni closed and I had to come
home for lockdown I found that hard
and I lost my way a bit. Luckily my
grandparents are pretty tech-savvy
so we could stay in touch but I did
miss being able to visit them. As soon
as I was able to, I moved over to stay
with them. They got me back on
track.
I just think grandparents think
differently than parents on how to
support us as young people.
.They give a different.
.perspective that helps.
.me.understand.the world.
.and.myself.a little better.
They give me a level of connection to
my whakapapa: where I’m from and
who I am, and that makes me feel
more confident in myself.
Nikau
When I stay with them I’m able to
support them with more physical
tasks around the house. At the same
time they’re always teaching me
practical skills - from gardening to
cooking and managing my money
and studies. We take care of each
other and I love that I have the
chance to give them something
back.
I wish more people would set aside
time each day, week and month to
spend with their grandparents. It
doesn’t even need to be their own
grandparents, just being with the
elderly, having a laugh and
conversation as much as supporting
and caring for them.

What can we take from this story?
Reflections:
- The connection between rangatahi / young people and
kaumātua / older people often has a special quality: warm,
non-judgemental and nurturing.
- Grandparent figures (whether biological or not) can create a safe
and comfortable environment to express feelings and work
through challenges
- Kaumātua and Kuia can provide vital connections to whakapapa
by sharing stories and kōrero with rangatahi
What questions does this raise for our approach to pandemics?
- Should a more holistic approach to ‘safety’ be encouraged when
people consider what ‘bubbles’ will sustain them through a
lockdown period?
- The perspectives of older people can be helpful to younger
people when going through times of stress. How might we draw on
this wisdom to build our resilience and help us get through
together?
What questions does this raise for a more connected future?
How might we...
- prioritise the reconnection of rangatahi with kaumatua and kuia?
- make space for shared and reciprocal conversations, fun and
laughter rather than just support and care?
- acknowledge the power and encourage the development of
these grandparental relationships, including where these are
non-biological?

As soon as COVID hit we got together
to figure out how we could support
our kaumātua and kuia. In our
community the majority are Māori,
most are over 60. We needed our
own plan for our community in the
context of Māoridom.
Aroha
Our intention was to protect older
people, the disabled and our babies.
We were stuck on the virus
but kaumātua and kuia
were coming into the
checkpoints to talk.
People had family just down the road
but they couldn’t visit. They didn’t
have a mobile or know how to check
their messages so they thought
no-one was calling. They thought,
‘nobody needs me,’ and some even
considered taking their own lives. So
we told them, ‘we need you.’
Our rangatahi were delivering
essentials and they were really stoked
to do it. We’re a small community -
everyone knows everyone but not a
lot of the rangatahi knew our elderly
so it was really cool that they got to
build those relationships and that
mutual respect.
They would go out to our rural
communities and see how they
were smoking fish, shelling kinas.
They got to taste some and see how
they were doing it. That was
powerful.
We were close before this
happened but new relationships
have formed and they’ll continue. If
they see each other in town they’ll
go and say hello. We’re also
carrying on with the food deliveries
for those people who have been
impacted - maybe they’ve lost
income through COVID.
Safety means more than just
protection from the virus - we need
to be culturally safe and
emotionally and physically
connected.

What can we take from this story?
Reflections:
- Knowing the people gives communities a really strong start to
respond quickly and appropriately. Something as simple as having
a list of kaumātua and kuia meant they knew who they needed to
reach and how.
- The communities this story reflects mobilised quickly and effectively
as they already had strong connections, were united in the desire
to keep people safe, and had strong leadership and organisation.
- In some cases COVID19 contributed to a loss of identity and
purpose, particularly where older people shifted from being active
in service of their whānau or community to a more one-way
relationship of being ‘protected’.
What questions does this raise for our approach to pandemics?
- Where communities are actively and effectively managing their
own response, how might they be supported and resourced to do
so in a way that works for them?
- What role might ‘vulnerable’ people play as part of the response?
How might their unique skills, experience and perspectives most
powerfully and safely contribute?
What questions does this raise for a more connected future?
How might we...
- balance the desire to protect, with the need to recognise and
respect older people’s autonomy and choice
- ensure ‘knowing the people’ is central to all interactions with older
people
- make sure the safeguards that give older people confidence in
their safety (e.g. in relation to data) don’t become ‘red tape’ that
hinders action?

When I grew up we knew all our
neighbours - that was just how life
was. Today, particularly in bigger
cities, people have no idea who lives
next door to them. People are so
busy.
We got really lucky with our
neighbours - they’re a lovely couple.
We have a lot in common and we
just clicked from day one. It has to
happen naturally - you can’t force it.
We have other neighbours we’ve
known for years but I guess we just
socialise differently.
We’re kind of like their parents really,
so grandparents to their little boys as
we don’t have any grandchildren of
our own. We actually had a similar
relationship when our kids were small
but then we were the younger ones.
COVID forced people to
talk to their neighbours -
just because they
desperately wanted to talk
to somebody!
Lots of people were checking on their
neighbours, helping them with
shopping, that sort of thing.
Peter &
Susan
I liked seeing all the families -
people you’d never normally see
walking. People were sitting at their
letterbox with 2m distance drinking
their glass of wine and talking. They
still do it today.
People are busy, life’s pace is
frantic. When we locked down lots
of people liked the fact that that
franticness was taken away but we
get on that merry-go-round again
so quickly.
Sometimes the small things really
matter. I just want people to be kind
and mindful and put themselves in
each others’ shoes.

What can we take from this story?
Reflections:
- COVID19 has provided opportunities for connection which break
through the awkwardness many people feel reaching out. Picking
up shopping, putting teddy bears in windows etc. enables risk-free
connection
- Relationships between individuals at any age comes down to the
basics: shared values, interests and real human connection.
- Modern life creates barriers to connection which permeate all
areas of our lives. Some of these were paused during lockdown:
people had time and were active and visible in their
neighbourhoods as well as having shared experiences and a
stronger sense of community.
What questions does this raise for our approach to pandemics?
- How might we support and amplify all the great connection
initiatives going on between neighbours across the country?
What questions does this raise for a more connected future?
- How might we sustain the desire, confidence and space to reach
out and connect as we move away from lockdowns and life gets
closer to its normal pace?
- There seems to be a natural desire for older people and new
parents to connect. What is the opportunity for mutual support
between these groups?
- What opportunities, spaces and places exist for older and younger
people to connect organically in an unforced, unmanaged way?

We don’t drive and I have a bit of
trouble getting around so we usually
have a volunteer driver for
appointments and the like. We like to
go for a drive around while the others
get picked up. It’s a bit of an outing.
We did miss that over lockdown.
On the other hand, we had a
wonderful volunteer picking up our
shopping for us so in some ways
things were actually easier. She
would give us a wave and a smile
and over time we started to chat.
She’s even been back to see us since
and showed us how to do our
shopping on the computer.
Our kids aren’t nearby and they do
worry so it really helped that we
already knew the volunteers - they’d
helped us out after the earthquakes
and we knew we could trust them.
We know we’re lucky. We have a
friend who cares for his partner - she
has dementia. All the support they
were used to had to stop during
lockdown and it’s hard when routines
change.
Pat &
Chris
It’s great when people
have neighbours or
family checking in but
not everyone has people
around or feels
comfortable reaching out
People have their own problems
and responsibilities and you don’t
want to add to that. Even for those
people with family nearby, there’s
pride in being able to organise
things for yourself rather than relying
on them to do it.

What can we take from this story?
Reflections:
- Fear of ‘being a burden’ is a major barrier to older people
reaching out and connecting (in spite of widespread recognition
that intergenerational connections provide huge value to both
older and younger people.)
- Trust and safety is very important for older people (and their
whānau) when accessing support
- Perversely, some people actually found themselves feeling less
isolated during lockdown. They were able to access services and
support that they hadn’t previously and felt less alone (mobility
cards was one example).
What questions does this raise for our approach to pandemics?
- What can be put in place to ensure adequate support is
consistently available through all levels of restrictions including full
lockdowns?
- What are the lessons we can learn from those who are coping with
isolation in their normal lives, to support those who struggle to
adapt to social distancing and other restrictions?
- How might we support and amplify the community-driven
initiatives which have stepped in to fill the gaps while formal
services have been unable to safely operate?
What questions does this raise for a more connected future?
- What additional supports made available during lockdown led to
additional positive impact, and how might we amplify these?
- What can we learn from the effectiveness of community-led
initiatives to build more positive intergenerational connections?
- How might we overcome the barriers which make it difficult for
older and younger people to reach out and connect?

This last few months has led us to reflect
on what’s important - people, our
health. Also to question what’s not
important - consumerism and buying
things that we’ve been living without.
Ramesh
COVID has shown us how weak humans
are. We need to take better care of
ourselves, each other, the environment.
We’re all connected - animals, nature
and the human race and we all need
to contribute.
Helping older people is ingrained in our
culture, but there are a lot of older
people here who don’t have their
family around to support them. Some
are being exploited by their children or
the people they are living with and
don’t know where to get help.
Some really struggled with the basics of
life - they couldn’t access their money
as they didn’t have online banking. It
was very difficult - they had the money
but they couldn’t pay for anything. It’s
not just about knowing how to use
technology, there’s a cost to digital
connection and not everyone has that.
It’s been very important that we check
in on people and make sure they’re ok.
For myself, because I know what
knowledge is available and how to
access it, I’ve used this time and
learned a lot.
Older people have time and
wisdom and we want to share our
skills. We’re always thinking ‘where
can we contribute.’
We’ve shared an
experience - something
mutual to connect about
and that’s important but
in order to connect you
have to first feel safe.

What can we take from this story?
Reflections:
- Reliable information relating to COVID19, restrictions and available
support didn’t reach everyone. In particular people without
internet access, with English as an additional language or other
accessibility needs missed out.
- For older people who are in an unsafe living situation or being in
some way exploited, lockdown was extremely difficult and
exacerbated by this lack of information
- Practical considerations such as how to access money without
internet banking can be a real issue and significantly affect
people’s ability to function through lockdown periods.
What questions does this raise for our approach to pandemics?
- How might we ensure that information, services and support are
reaching people who do not have access to digital channels,
speak languages other than English or have other accessibility
needs?
- What culturally appropriate, safe and accessible support is in
place for those experiencing elder abuse or other urgent issues?
- What provision is there for offline essential services, and what
support is in place to enable people to navigate it?
What questions does this raise for a more connected future?
- What opportunities exist to create and amplify connections
around issues of common concern e.g. the environment,
sustainable growth etc.
- How might we amplify and support community-led initiatives
which play a vital role in keeping older people connected?
- How might we share and spread the value of spirituality to build
both connection across the generations, and mental resilience.

Our thanks to those who shared their stories and perspectives with us,
young and old, to those who have supported this work in other ways,
and to all those who have worked tirelessly to keep us safe and
connected during this time.