CEAC-2022-08-August

Boiler Room Annex
High Vaultage
Source: www.edn.com
There once was a young engineer, who, having worked for
several years, decided that he and his family should have
a weekend getaway place. He searched the surrounding
country and found a lovely spot with frontage on a small
river. They built a cabin and began spending time there every
chance they got. The kids loved it, and friends came for the
quiet and fishing.
The engineer, however, wanted something unique for
his cabin. He had been an award-winning pole-vaulter in
college. So he built a set of poles with a crosspiece, and a
mulched run. He bought a new carbon-fiber vaulting pole,
new shoes, and was all set. He would start off down the run,
plant his pole, soar over the crosspiece, and land in the river
with a satisfying splash. What a great way to spend a hot
afternoon. He tried to teach a few friends to vault, with no
success.
One spring, he went out early after a very wet winter with
lots of rain. When the family arrived, the river was up and
flowing at a good clip, with twice the usual current. The
engineer was determined to enjoy a few vaults into the water,
but his wife didn’t think it was safe. But he was a good
swimmer, and proceeded to have a go at it. His run and jump
were flawless, and he hit the water in good form, but upon
surfacing, he was swept downstream and disappeared. His
body was found later that day, tangled in streamside debris.
It was a sad end for the engineer, and the family sold the
cabin, with no desire to return to the scene of such tragedy.
Our lamented engineer was a civil engineer. Had he consulted
one of his electrical engineer compadres, he would have
been warned that “It's not vaultage that kills you, it's the
current!”
Solving a Burning Problem
Source: www.reddit.com
An engineer, a mathematician, a statistician and a physicist
are staying in a hotel room. Late at night, a spark emerges
from the electrical socket, and soon enough, flames begin
Solution:
A M E B A I W O A C S A L T A R
C A L Y X A N I M A L D O C M Y R R H
C R U E L A N T I P A S T O M E U S E
R E D E R R T E N L E O C O T
A S E A E P E E O R A L C E N T
Y A P E R E C W A F L U
T H E E G N A W I N G I D L Y
C W O R A D S S T P E N E A T
N O N O L E F E W E R A R K G N U
S C O W E M A I L S U P R A D I K E
I R E E X T M R S U S E
S T A B P R E L L A M O N G B L E U
B I B S R I Y U M M Y I O N A I M
E E L W E T G A B P T A T S P
S E M I D E E M I N G I T E M
U G H A P R T E E A L I
B R I G U S D A T E L L E E L S
A I D G M T N A P E A R L I E
S N O R E E X T O R T I O N S W I N E
I S L A M W I L D C A R D S V O T E R
N E S T S I C E S S E P E E R S
shooting out. All four wake up in a panic. The engineer
thinks to douse the flames using anything but water. The
physicist thinks to shut off all power and rushes down to the
hotel lobby. The mathematician is convinced that no solution
exists and goes back to bed. But the statistician looks a moment
thoughtfully at the growing conflagration and decides
to light the curtains of the room on fire, saying, “We need
more data.”
Fancy Book Learning
Source: Reddit.com
JULY SOLUTION
An old country gentleman sent his son off to engineering
school. Four years later, upon his son’s return, he asked him
what the lad had learned at college. The son replied, “Pi r
squared.” The dad exclaimed, “You didn’t learn nothin’ boy
— pie are round! Cornbread’s square!”
Volume 87 · Number 8 | 69