Inspiring Women Magazine November 2023

I began my career as a computer
programmer. As the only woman in the
office at the time, it was quite a challenge.
However, I was determined to excel. I
entered an arranged marriage in 1992,
with my grandmother playing a crucial
role in bringing our families together.
After marriage, my husband's job led us to
live in various places in India. We initially
started our life together in a small place
in Andhra Pradesh and then moved to
Sonadih, Chhattisgarh, a township for Tata
Steel employees. Here, I began my journey
of teaching and community service,
especially among tribal communities.
Later, in 2002, we moved to Kuala Lumpur,
Malaysia, where I worked as a school
teacher at an international school.
Working there gave me the opportunity
to meet, share and learn from children of
the world and my amazing peers, opening
my mind to different cultures. After living
in Malaysia for 14 years, we embarked on
an adventure, moving to Lyon, France, and
eventually to Heidelberg, Germany, where
we currently reside.
What preparations, if any, did you make
before moving to your new country? For
example, did you learn the language or
study up on the culture? Tell us how you
did it.
My approach to moving to new countries
has always been one of open-mindedness
and flexibility. I never made any specific
mental preparations before relocating.
I believe that part of adapting is being
like a river, flowing with new zeal and
enthusiasm without any qualms, to a new
environment. Learning the basics of the
language and immersing myself in the
culture came organically as I interacted
with people at work and local shops. I find
that watching movies, meeting people, and
making use of the local library and gym are
excellent ways to learn about a new place.
Representing India and Indian culture in Lyon's
annual "Fête des Bannières du Monde" or
International Flag Festival. (top)
Meeting with an international women's group
in Lyon. (bottom)
Tell us about your arrival. Was there anything
you immediately noticed that was different
from your home country?
We arrived in Germany filled with excitement
and curiosity. It was in mid-November, and I
was eager to experience a European winter
and its fashion, something I had always admired.
This move also took place at the early stages of
my menopause – so the cool climate was perfect
for my body! While many people tended to wear
black and gray during this season, I enjoyed
mixing colors and incorporating ethnic pieces
into my winter outfits. My image and sense of
fashion have been greatly influenced by the
places I've lived.
One immediate observation was the reserved
nature of Germans, which taught me to be
more patient with people. However, I firmly
believe that a smile is a universal language
and a bridge to connect with people from
different backgrounds.
Did anyone help you to feel included in your
new country? If so, how? How do you help
newcomers to adapt and feel included?
In Lyon, France, a family friend, Joellie, played a
crucial role in helping me to adapt. Additionally,
our husbands’ company organized cultural
integration sessions that provided valuable
information on various aspects of life in France,
from lifestyle and finance to housing and
health. I felt privileged to have access to such
resources, and I realized the importance of
employers offering such support.
To help newcomers adapt and feel included, I
always strive to be warm and welcoming. There
Celebrating at
home with friends.
is a comfort curve to overcome, so I reassure
people that they are not alone, and that the
initial adjustment period is a natural part of
the process. I encourage newcomers not to
be afraid to ask questions, reach out to their
neighbours, utilize the internet for information,
and learn the basics of the language.
Volunteering within the neighborhood
community can also be an excellent way to
connect and establish a sense of belonging.
It typically takes about 3–6 months to find
one's bearings in the local way of life. My
personal motto is "You must involve yourself
to evolve."
What are the biggest challenges you had to
overcome in adapting to your new country?
Adapting to a new country is a transformative
journey that requires reorientation. A significant
challenge I faced was the feeling of losing one's
identity, especially when moving with a partner
and leaving behind a familiar routine, work,
people and places. Socially, it can be hard to feel
accepted and find a sense of belonging within a
new local community.
In Germany, finding a rental property proved to
be one of the toughest aspects of our move. We
initially stayed in a hotel for six months before
securing our first place. As newcomers, it was
difficult to establish positive relationships with
landlords due to cultural differences and a lack
of local connections. Finding the ideal location,
managing finances, and other logistical issues
added to the complexity. During this time, I
also grappled with homesickness, compounded
by the loss of my mother that year. Despite
these obstacles, we persevered and found a
suitable house.
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