International School Parent Magazine - Spring 2024

Having raised three kids I get it,
getting up, ready and out the
door in the morning can seem
like a military operation. So why not
treat it as such?
The key steps in planning a
military operation include:
• Defining the objective
• Conducting a thorough
assessment
• Developing a plan
• Assessing risks
• Conducting rehearsals
• Executing the plan
• Monitoring, adapting,
debriefing and evaluating
1Let’s start with defining the
objectives
Getting out in the morning will include
a morning ritual which will have habits,
customs and routines. If used properly, the
right actions practised with consistency
could have a major impact on your family
life.
Benefits of having a clear morning
routine: it has the ability to reduce your
negative voice in the house, increase
teamwork, reduce procrastination, boost
confidence, improve overall performance
and happiness of the home and set the day
up on a positive note.
2Conduct a thorough assessment
Ask yourself:
• Why is your current morning operation
not working? Are you yelling, getting up
too late, trying to do too many jobs in the
morning, fighting over getting dressed? Are
the kids tired and maybe you need to work
on your bedtime routine?
• What IS working? If something is
working, you can carry that forward to your
new morning operational plan.
• Did it used to work? Have a think about
whether your morning did work at some
point and what were you doing differently?
Often when I work with parents, they can
remember a point in their family life where
a morning routine was working. So think
about why that was and why you stopped
doing what worked well. What changed?
3Developing a plan
It’s important that you use the whole
team here and don’t just set up a plan alone
and then force it on everyone. In order for
a military operation to go smoothly and
successfully you need the whole team on
your side, working with you in co-operation.
So sit down with your team and talk about
what needs to be done in order for this
operation (morning routine) to go well.
• Talk about what is working well for
the moment.
• Talk about where everyone thinks it
goes wrong.
• Listen to their ideas: listen to
understand, not to talk. Bite your tongue
if you feel you want to interrupt or oppose
their ideas. If you want them to follow the
new routine, this needs to be their operation
too. They need to feel that they have some
level of control.
• Let them have a say: maybe they
want to eat breakfast first and get dressed
afterwards. Trust that they can make good
decisions. Give it a go, you can always
review it later.
• Less is more: maybe they really
don’t have to make their beds, empty the
dishwasher etc. in the morning. Just focus
on the tasks that really matter: get up, get
dressed, eat breakfast and go. This means
there is less to follow up on and therefore
less commands.
• Children are individual: ‘I am a
morning person – or evening person’. We
hear adults saying it, and kids are individual
too so try to think in these lines. I was
working with a dad who said that his son
really wasn’t hungry in the morning. So
they decide to give it and go and that he
could bring his breakfast to school and
eat in there. It worked, and they took out
a major stress factor from the morning
routine. My daughter is not a morning
person so she chooses not to do her
bed and other chores in the morning
but in the afternoon. My son was
a morning person and was up
before everyone else and that is
where he functions best so did
his home work there.
• List all the tasks that are
needed in their morning
routine: get up, get dressed,
eat breakfast, brush teeth,
lunch in the bag, put on coat
and shoes etc. Then add them in
a sequence that suits everyone.
• Make it visual and clear: Once
you have agreed to all the above, write
or draw up the plan. Make sure everyone
signs it and hang it somewhere where
everyone can see.
• A good morning operation starts
the night before: so what can you do
the night before so you have less to do
in the morning? Get clothes ready, pack
school bags and PE kits, set the breakfast
table, have shoes and coat ready etc. And
homework is not for the morning (unless it
works for the individual child)!
4
Assessing risks
So, now you have a plan, will it work?
Is there anything in your plan that might
create risks of failure? For instance:
• You have agreed to get up at 7.30 but
need to be out the door by 8. Is that
realistic, or do you need to get up earlier?
• You have agreed to do the lunches in the
morning. You might see a risk that it will
cause fights and delays so maybe do that the
evening before?
• You know that you are not a morning
person and might be the one that causes
negative tension in the home? So maybe
you need to get up earlier to get some alone
time, meditate, do your chores etc.
Consult the ‘team’ - ask them if there is
anything in the new morning routine that
they think might not work.
5
Conducting rehearsals
Try the morning routine on a weekend
to see if your new operation plan works and
will fall into place once war really breaks
out. This way you have time to adjust the
plan in calm times and not in the heat of
the moment.
INTERNATIONAL SCHOOL PARENT SPRING 2024 | 51