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HYSTERICAL GEOGRAPHY OF JERUSALEM<br />
Now class, ש ק ט , we want to get started. I, Shauli, and my bald<br />
assistant Famous Amos would like to welcome you to the Historical<br />
Geography of Jerusalem class for this school year 2486—2487 AD.<br />
This year we are trying an experiment. Instead of learning about the<br />
history of Jerusalem over the past few thousand years, we are going to<br />
study one year in the history of the city, specifically that is, exactly<br />
five hundred years ago from today.<br />
We will be studying the city according to region. Today’s<br />
introductory lecture will be three hours long and we will begin<br />
covering our first ש ט ח , Aft. Scopus. Geographically, this mount is in a<br />
perfect place to watch the sunset, and beautifully isolated from the<br />
heart of the city. Nearby affluent neighbourhoods offered great<br />
shopping located at close proximity, w ith the stores set into an<br />
enclosed roofed marketplace. Archaeological digs at the French Hill<br />
Market have interestingly revealed many unmatched socks and other<br />
examples of ancient garments.<br />
מ י ל נ ו<br />
5־ 1<br />
. 1 E R U S A L E M<br />
R U B B E R S H O P<br />
Now, on to the a rc h ite c tu re . The buildings were constructed of<br />
Jerusalem stone in a sprawling manner and were usually connected<br />
via walkways. M ain buildings to remember include Resnick, Idelson,<br />
Goldsmith and Frank Sinatra. Interesting finds in most of the main<br />
buildings include sim ilar large rooms. Contents of these rooms that<br />
were found include tables, trays, metal railings and prim itive kitchens.<br />
Our historians have pieced these odd fragments together to form an<br />
unusual theory of ancient feeding techniques. It seems the inhabitants<br />
lined up (that’s qued up for you BASP students) in tight spaces to<br />
receive food in mass dining halls. This is hard for our minds to<br />
comprehend especially since institutionalized food today is terrible, it<br />
certainly4could not have been better in anceint times.<br />
Our next topic is W a te r S ystem s. Pay attention because this<br />
subject will certainly be covered on the exam. The water system on<br />
Mt. Scopus was prim itive indeed. The water was periodically turned<br />
off altogether. Hot water was only available during prime evening<br />
socializing hours, and not always in sufficient quantities.<br />
T hat’s all for now. We’ll meet next time to discuss the reasons why<br />
archaelogists cannot completely piece together the ruins of two other<br />
buildings on Mt. Scopus —the Sports Center, and. the Hyatt Hotel.<br />
by A nna Urowitz<br />
פעיל ולפפורט<br />
ולש אוסנוריז־ והנרי מונטור<br />
vmArnwm<br />
: m u n o D fm i ׳<br />
C |י|ץי*<br />
ASTR1D&HENRY MONTOR, OUTDOOR<br />
1 RECREATION m SPQRT CENTER I<br />
1 IS BEING ERECTED ON THIS SITE 5