Heretics book 3 - The Apocryphile Press

THE KINGDOM :: 159
the notion. I’m a fucking witch, she thought. There’s no way
they would have me. There’s no way He would have me. She
looked at the icon again, and she knew that it wasn’t true.
What was it that was written above the giant icon in the
chapel? This man eats with fuckups and sinners. No, he
would not turn even a witch away. She wouldn’t have known
that three days ago, but she did now.
“I’ll join this fucking Order,” she said, just to hear it again.
“You don’t have to do that,” a soft voice came from the
doorway. Brian stuck his head in and smiled at her, his closeshaved
head bobbing at an odd angle due to the hump on his
back. He also limped a little when he walked, and he
dragged his left foot into the doorway with the rest of him.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t eavesdropping, really. I came to see if
you needed any help.” He laid a small bundle on the bed
beside her. “Fresh linens.”
She was actually relieved to see him, and scooted over on
the bed, an unspoken invitation to join her.
“What do you mean, I don’t have to do it?”
“You don’t have to make bargains with God.”
Her lip trembled as she fought back another wave of tears.
Brian reached out and put his hand on top of hers.
“I’m just so...so scared. For Randy and Mikael.”
“I know,” Brian said, “And good old Yeshua over there
knows it, too.” He pointed at the icon. “And it’s very tempting
to want to exert any kind of control we can when we feel
like we have so little. But God isn’t going to intercede just to
trap you into making some commitment to him. God already
has you.”
“But I’m a witch!”
“And I’m a Jew! So what?” His eyes softened as he looked
at her. “God doesn’t give a rat’s ass about your religious affiliation,
or how you like to worship, or in what form you
imagine the divine. God isn’t going to help us because we’re