KATOWICE - In Your Pocket

46 NIGHTLIFE
Katowice For Beer Lovers
After a dozen or so hangovers (and extra trips to the
shop for bog roll), Polish beer generally leaves one with
an understanding of why vodka is so popular in Poland.
Silesia has the honour of being home to the two worst
offenders – Tyskie and Żywiec – which enjoy ubiquitous
national distribution and sadly also bear the mantle of
Polish beer abroad. Put a half-litre of each in front of you,
blindfold yourself and we doubt your palate can discern
the difference. Locals will argue that since international
buyouts the quality of both has declined, but that’s beside
the point. Basically a diet of these two gets boring fast
for anyone with a real affinity for beer. What too often
goes unrealised is that Poland actually has hundreds
of independent microbreweries that produce delicious
beer. In the last few years, Kraków and Warsaw have
finally caught on, with the beer culture of those two cities
happily changing to make Polish microbrews readily
available in many bars and shops. Katowice, being a bit
closer to home, and hardly known as a trendsetter on
the nightlife front, has yet to proliferate alternatives to
Tyskie, Żywiec and other mass market beers, but there
are a growing number of exceptions.
One of our favourite places in Katowice is Fanaberia
(see Cafes) and we’re not going to pretend that it’s not
because of their great beer selection. The widest variety
we’ve seen in the city, it changes often but generally
includes beers from Gdańsk’s Amber Brewery (Żywe
and the excellent Koźlak), Olsztyn’s Kormoran Brewery
(cherry and plum-flavoured beers), Ciechan Brewery from
north of Warsaw (offering wheat, honey, porter and even
stout), and the excellent Witnica Brewery near the German
border, which produces a wide variety of styles – try
their curiously named Piwo Keltyckie (Celtic Beer) if you
have the chance (look for the blue label).
A rather low-key locale, you may be in the minority drinking in
Fanaberia and they also close early, so your next best option
is the super trendy Kato on ul. Mariacka. Kato’s selection
of bottled microbrews is always in flux but there are plenty
to choose from; we recommend Magnus, a sweet dark beer
from the Jagiełło Brewery in far eastern Poland. If you’re
looking for something more local, head to Kremowa (see
Cafes) or Latająca Świnia (see International Restaurants)
to try a draft from the Castle Brewery in Raciborz. 80km
southeast from Katowice, Raciborz is about as far from the
city as you can go without leaving Silesia, but Silesian beer
it is. Their quality brews include a honey lager, dark bock
beer and the mysterious ‘green pilsner’, which is even on
tap in Kremowa so you can appreciate the full absurdity of
drinking a half-litre of green liquid. In addition to Raciborz
brews, Latająca Świnia also offers Fortuna Porter (from
outside Poznań) and fruity ales from the aforementioned
Kormoran Brewery and Cornelius Brewery’s ‘Grapefruit
Wheat’ beer (produced south of Łódż).
If you want to stack these national ales against their
Czech counterparts, Dobra Karma (see Vegetarian
Restaurants) offers beers from the Czech Primator
Brewery, including a pale ale, wheat, and double porter.
Finally, we have to mention that Katowice actually has
two microbreweries of its own - Bierhalle and Spiż -
where the beer is produced on site and certainly worth
drinking (see Microbreweries). Unfortunately, the former
is located in a shopping mall, and the latter is a dreadful
student disco, which is currently being renovated. Still, in
Katowice there are plenty of ways to stay off the Żywiec,
so take advantage or start conditioning yourself to be
a vodka drinker. Na zdrowie (‘to your health’); literally.
mock convertible you can actually climb inside with a drink
are nice touches, though there’s nothing original about the
ubiquitous chrome, leather, license plates and airbrushed
corvettes on the walls. Tons of seating, a large stage and a
dance-floor with a projector (being used for FIFA ‘10 during
our visit) make Garage a versatile venue for concerts, weekend
student rave-ups and their legendary Thursday karaoke
nights with a live band (start 21:00). QOpen 17:00 - 24:00,
Fri, Sat 17:00 - 04:00. PAEXW
Cooler Club D-4, ul. Mariacka 20, tel. (+48) 508 24
91 98, www.coolerclub.pl. Is it? Not particularly, no, but
not for lack of trying. If by cooler you mean louder and more
self aware, then this is the coolest joint in town, bro. Typical
of most fancy fashion clubs we’ve finessed our way into the
last few years, Cooler treads a familiar line of indulgent ornate
extravagance and modern minimalism in violet, silver and
black, with illuminated liquor shelves, fabric covered walls
and original bricks. Small, without anywhere to escape the
deafening hip-hop and r’n’b pop noise that carries throughout
the entire building and down the street on weekends, some
(like ourselves) would be better suited to enjoy it in the early
evening when it serves quite nicely as a sexy cocktail lounge
and place for a lite bite with some solid nachos and quesadillas
on the menu. QOpen 14:00 - 01:00, Fri 14:00 - 05:00,
Sat 16:00 - 05:00. Closed Sun. PAGXW
Cotton Club C-2, ul. Matejki 2, tel. (+48) 664 14 55
73, www.cotton-club.com.pl. A huge club hailing itself as
a modern speak-easy, the decor delivers a muddled homage
to gangsterism full of anachronisms, Italian/American/
Caribbean confusion and questionable political correctness,
with a long wraparound bar and a plethora of nooks to hide
out in during the next unexpected Prohibition raid. Overall, a
decent design idea that falls flat, unlike the patrons who have
plenty of bounce. The decibel levels are drum-shattering and
the dance-floor is packed full of wasp-waisted sweeties who
should probably be home studying for the Polish equivalent
of the SATs. QOpen 17:00 - 01:00, Fri, Sat 20:00 - 05:00.
Closed Mon, Tue, Sun. PABXW
Czekolada H-1, ul. Dworcowa 6, Chorzów, tel. (+48)
32 771 84 46, www.klubczekolada.pl. Absolutely the
last thing you’d expect to find in Chorzów, it’s easy to be
sceptical of a place that tries as hard as Czekolada. A ‘lookat-me-please’
lounge featuring Fashion TV and a barstaff that
seem to have borrowed their dispositions from the catwalk,
Czekolada backs it up with expertly made chocolate drinks.
Dark patterned walls and no overhead lighting create an
intimate atmosphere, offset by street-side wall-length windows.
Thoroughly impressive, it doesn’t take long to realise
that this modern, seductive locale is the real deal. QOpen
16:00 - 05:00, Mon, Sun 16:00 - 23:00, Tue 16:00 - 01:00,
Wed, Thu 16:00 - 02:00. PAUXW
Genesis Music & Dance Club C-2, ul. Matejki 3,
tel. (+48) 602 71 71 22, www.klubgenesis.pl. Genesis
has grown up a bit without really changing at all. While the
shenanigans next door at Pomarancza now siphon off most
of the students, a slightly more mature crowd heads here
to hike it up, let it hang out and have some real fun. A 20zł
cover gets you into this amazing multi-coloured assault on
the senses with strobing lights, a receded dance-floor and
a very sexy VIP section; alternatively you can escape to
the adjoining Sofa Club for a bit more space and pseudosophistication.
In Genesis, the music may not be cutting edge
but that’s no reason not to get armpit deep in the action,
joining the neighbourhood nymphs who go epileptic on the
dance-floor deep into the pink daze of dawn. Q Open Fri,
Sat only 21:00 - 05:00. PAXW
Katowice In Your Pocket katowice.inyourpocket.com
Gwarek M-3, ul. Rynek 18, Gliwice, tel. (+48) 32 231
42 36, www.gwarek.gliwice.pl. Spot on the Rynek, this
is probably the most notorious club in Gliwice. Absolutely
massive with lots of black lights, chrome piping and extraterrestrial
textures, there are plenty of nookie nooks
amongst the red booths and the dancefloor is impressively
huge, but overall the dated design is hardly deserving of
an award. As such, you’d have to judge it on the merits
of the clientele, who we were stood up by at 22:00 on a
weeknight; this after paying a small cover to get in, plus 2zł
for the obligatory coatroom. We’ll assume something goes
down here on the right night, but given the circumstances
it’s hard to know if Gwarek is a proper club or a practical
joke. QOpen 21:00 - 03:00, Thu, Fri, Sat 21:00 - 06:00.
Closed Mon, Tue. PAXW
Inqbator D-3, ul. Dworcowa 2, tel. (+48) 668 37 24
33, www.inq.pl. Hit them on a Saturday and you’ll struggle
to find a better venue in town for electro sounds. As such
it’s a highly charged crowd you’ll find staring into space with
cartoon smiles while repetitive beats shoot fireworks into
what is left of their brain. The walls quite literally drip with
sweat, while the murky interiors look like they’ve been thrown
together as an afterthought by a stoned student with time
on his hands. Completely excellent. Q Open Fri, Sat only
16:00 - 06:00. AXW
Klub Pomarańcza C-2, ul. Matejki 3, tel. (+48) 513
60 03 00, www.klubpomarancza.pl. Continuing the
Katowice trend of mistaking a club for an airport, this megafun
factory may have the most intimidating security we’ve
seen. But if club hoppers can get past the metal detector,
the cover-charge turnstile and jackbooted guards redirecting
the herd to the mandatory coat check, their senses will be
overwhelmed. A massive dance floor beset with all manner of
synchronized lighting effects greets guests. Dancers wiggle
away on a central mini stage, lovely ladies watch from the
balcony above and couples cuddle in the plush booths. At the
top, tucked inside a glass-enclosure is the ‘RNB Klub,’ home
to another DJ, a second bar and deafening bass amps. A
third DJ spins in the ‘Tropicana Room’ somewhere a half-level
below. Enough entertainment to justify the effort at the gate
and the line spilling onto the street. QOpen 21:00 - 06:00,
Thu, Sun 21:00 - 04:00. Closed Mon, Tue. PAUXW
Lemoniada D-3, ul. Mariacka 4, tel. (+48) 883 99
53 72, www.lemoniada.pl. The cult of Lemoniada has
captured Kato’s party crowd. After conquering Wrocław
and Warsaw, the club has newfound flocks willing to wait 90
minutes in a queue stretching onto the Mariacka promenade.
Professional security patiently weeds out the impatient
and the underdressed even as VIP-card members and the
moneyed who’s who float up the stairs and through the glass
door with ease. Inside, the cellar-style labyrinth is pimped out
with bright, trance-inducing colours, the dance floor is packed
wall to wall and a team of bar staff struggles to understand
shouted orders. Velvet curtains screen off privately reserved
rooms tucked into nooks and corners all around. A passage
allows access to the Fashion TV lounge. Bring loads of cash
and your A-game. QOpen 21:00 - 05:00, Thu 21:00 - 04:00.
Closed Mon, Tue, Wed, Sun. PAUBX
Mega Club B-1, ul. Żelazna 9, tel. (+48) 605 21 89
30, www.megaclub.pl. Established in 1993 this venue
is a dinosaur in clubbing years, though still manages to
stand out as the Big Boss in terms of Katowice club options.
Let the list of performers who have appeared here
speaks for itself, with cult names like Smolik, Gus Gus,
New Model Army and The Legendary Pink Dots all having
taken the stage. Vast, and though some may accuse the
katowice.inyourpocket.com
Smoking
NIGHTLIFE
After holding out to be one of the few remaining EU
countries with no or very few prohibitions on smoking, a
new law brought in on the 15th November 2010 aimed to
limit the activities of smokers in public places.
Smoking is now completely banned on public transport including
taxis, trains, company cars, public transport stops,
children’s playgrounds, schools, universities, workplaces,
sports arenas and other places where the public gather.
Owners are obliged to clearly place a clear and visible ‘No
Smoking’ sign and anyone caught smoking by either the
police or local city guard is subject to a 500zl fine.
There are, however, exceptions. It is possible to smoke
in some bars, clubs, restaurants and other public places.
The law states that there can be a SEPARATE ROOM
created for smokers as long as it is properly ventilated
and closed off from the other public areas (originally this
was only going to be permitted in premises over 100m2,
but that make the final version of the law). As many
places listed in this guide are simply too small to allow
for a separate room, this has automatically made them
subject to the ban. To help you to find or avoid places
which will continue to allow smoking on the premises we
have used the following symbols throughout the guide
G This place has a complete ban on smoking on the
premises
X This place has a smoking section on the premises
Having now had some time to gauge reaction it appears
that owners have followed one of three courses of action.
Firstly they have through choice or necessity obeyed the
law and the whole premises are now non-smoking. A
second group, generally those with bigger premises, have
exercised their right to build a smoking room. The third
group have examined the wording of the law and then driven
an articulated lorry through the holes left by incompetent
legislators. We have seen examples of entire bars allowing
smoking by making the vast majority of the place smoking
with a small area in the front, back or downstairs, set aside
for non-smokers. We have even seen an example of two
restaurants joining together and claiming the smoking area
is in one restaurant while the non-smoking area is in the one
next door. The latest twist is some bars openly flouting the
law by allowing smoking due to the lack of enforcement. A
regular in one bar told us that everyone has agreed to be
fined making it impossible for the owner to be punished and
difficult for the city police to enforce. The looseness of the
wording of the new law and the apparent inability or will to
police it suggest that while it will certainly reduce smoking
in many public places, it will still allow it to continue in a lot
of others. Choose carefully.
July - October 2012
47