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35 How Conversations Work and hands still, or looking steadily at the speaker while they are speaking, can make a big and immediate difference to the quality of the conversation. Key factors: managing behaviour • Check the context. Don’t try to interpret non-verbal messages in isolation from any others, or from the wider situation. Folded arms may mean that someone is hostile to your ideas, or that they are cold. • Look for clusters. If you are picking up a group of non-verbal messages that seem to indicate a single feeling, you may be able to trust your interpretation more fully. • Consider past experience. We can interpret more accurately the behaviour of people we know. We certainly notice changes in their behaviour. We also interpret patterns of behaviour over time more accurately than single instances. • Check your perceptions. Ask questions. You are interpreting observed behaviour, not reading someone’s mind. Check out what you observe and make sure that your interpretation is accurate. ( c) 2011 Kogan Page L imited, All Rights Reserved.
3 Seven ways to improve your conversations <strong>Your</strong> success as a manager depends on your ability to hold effective and productive conversations. This chapter looks at seven proven strategies to help you improve your conversations. 1. Clarify your objective. 2. Structure your thinking. 3. Manage your time. 4. Find common ground. 5. Move beyond argument. 6. Summarise often. 7. Use visuals. Don’t feel that you must apply all seven at once. Take a single strategy and work at it for a few days. (You should have plenty of conversations to practise on!) Once you feel that you have integrated that skill into your conversations, move on to another. ( c) 2011 Kogan Page L imited, All Rights Reserved.
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198 Appendix Steven Mithen’s book
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200 Appendix Chapter 9: Networking:
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