Kick - sanfl

6
THE
PHANTOM
the ghost that talks
NIGHT GRAND FINAL
Yes the rumours are true. The
Phantom has been asked to
draw up a blueprint for a night
Grand Final.
Being a football guru, I have
decided that just changing from
daylight to nocturnal is not enough.
Oh, no, not enough by a long shot.
What we need is some really
radical stuff to top the great
extravaganza to our south east
where Meatloaf Two is a distinct
possibility.
So on Sunday night I put down
my preview copy of the Crows
Cookbook (by the way, what
happened to the recipes I
submitted, Power Cream Puffs and
Flambe Chardonnay Crepes)
Anyway, down went the recipe
book and on went the thinking cap.
The SANFL is grassroots footy so
my first thought was that we need
to bring back the physicality of the
first bounce. Remember when you
would watch the start of any footy
telecast – any match at all –
because the first bounce always
led to a bit of testosterone-fuelled
push and shove
Bring it back I say. So first new
rule: no-one can be reported in the
first 30 seconds of any game. Next,
the dropkick goal would be worth
nine points. Doesn’t have to be
outside the 50, it just has to be a
droppie. Tell me people wouldn’t
flock to see that! And perhaps a
bonus point if the kicker is wearing
a pair of ‘Capper’ shorts.
New stats please
I believe there should be a new
stat added to the game: mistakes!
We look at the positive stats but
the negative stuff is possibly more
important. With a lot of teams
playing their first game last
weekend there were tired legs,
cramps and a hell of a lot of
mistakes late in each quarter.
I’m not suggesting a Shame File.
Let’s just get a balance. Mistakes
are costly.
I guarantee you that within five
years from now, this stat will be a
common occurrence.
While I am on it, I heard a
suggestion that if we could find a
way to get players match fit for
“Remember when
you would watch
the start of any
footy telecast
– any match at
all – because
the first bounce
always led to a bit
of testosteronefuelled
push and
shove”
Round One, it would be worth solid
gold. Imagine that! It would be like
Cliff Young, who ran through the
night when the others slept - a
game changer.
It would be worth being over-ripe
in Round One, deliberately ease
back in the mid-season and then
come back strong for the Finals.
LETTERS AND TEXTS
TO THE CAVE
What a fantastic night it was at
Gliderol Stadium! As a Glenelg
supporter, I was thrilled to see
the boys get up over West. But
the best thing about the evening
was the atmosphere.
There is something special about
night footy and with over 6,000
people at the game it just goes
to show how much people love
footy under lights.
Sean of Brighton.
Do you have something
to say about the SANFL
Then please send your
thoughts with your name and
suburb through to The
Phantom’s Cave. How do you
think your team will go Email
editor@boylen.com.au or
text us on 0410 528 892.