American Sniper - Boekje Pienter

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WAR
I’m not the same guy I was when I first went to war.
No one is. Before you’re in combat, you have this innocence about
you. Then, all of a sudden, you see this whole other side of life.
I don’t regret any of it. I’d do it again. At the same time, war definitely
changes you.
You embrace death.
As a SEAL, you go to the Dark Side. You’re immersed in it.
Continually going to war, you gravitate to the blackest parts of existence.
Your psyche builds up its defenses—that’s why you laugh at
gruesome things like heads being blown apart, and worse.
Growing up, I wanted to be military. But I wondered, how would I
feel about killing someone
Now I know. It’s no big deal.
I did it a lot more than I’d ever thought I would—or, for that matter,
more than any American sniper before me. But I also witnessed
the evil my targets committed and wanted to commit, and by killing
them, I protected the lives of many fellow soldiers.
I don’t spend a lot of time philosophizing about killing people. I have
a clear conscience about my role in the war.
I am a strong Christian. Not a perfect one—not close. But I
strongly believe in God, Jesus, and the Bible. When I die, God is going
to hold me accountable for everything I’ve done on earth.
He may hold me back until last and run everybody else through
the line, because it will take so long to go over all my sins.
“Mr. Kyle, let’s go into the backroom. . . .”