A Guide To Your New Family's First Weeks - Meriter Health Services

Sibling Relationships
Most families experience growing pains with the addition of a new baby. Your older children may need assurance that
your baby is a family addition, not a replacement. Assure your children that there is plenty of love to go around and
that each child is special.
In The Hospital
Hospital Visits
Older siblings often want to be the first visitors to
see the baby. Try to schedule the first visit without
other visitors present, and when the child is well
rested and fed.
Keep your baby in the crib until the child is ready
to meet her. This keeps mom’s arms ready for a big
hug and greeting. Some families like the children to
exchange a small gift.
Base the length of the visit on the child’s behavior.
Sibling visits are important, but set aside some time
for just mom, dad and the new baby.
At Home
Baby’s Homecoming
Some families make the trip home from the hospital
a family event. Others prefer to have the older
children wait at home for your baby to arrive. Mom’s
arms should be free and ready to receive the older
children.
Visitors
If possible, delay visitors for a few days to keep the
family focused on each other. Children have enough
trouble sharing their parent’s attention with the new
baby.
When visitors do arrive, encourage their attention
toward the older children. It’s nice to let the older
children introduce the baby to guests and open any
baby gifts they might bring. Visitors sometimes help
by bringing a special treat or gift for the older
children.
Helping Your Child Adjust To The Baby
Parents need to let the sibling relationship develop
at its own pace, while at the same time providing
guidance and support for sibling bonds.
Your older child may surprise you with behaviors
you have never seen before. Some children have even
asked their parents to “take the baby back to the
hospital.”
It is important to understand the developmental level
of the older child. Try to look at the world and your
new baby through that child’s eyes. Just because there
is a new baby, you cannot expect older children to
behave more maturely than their age allows.
You should relate changing roles and responsibilities
for older children to their age rather than because of
a new baby. Resist making other major changes in
your older children’s lives until they have had time to
adjust to the new baby.
Visit your local library or bookstore for books on
child development and sibling relationships.
Siblings And Safety Issues
Children, especially toddlers and preschoolers, are
not aware of safe behavior around babies. Parents
must set rules and teach appropriate behaviors. Here
are several ways to increase your children’s safety:
• Monitor your older child and baby until you
feel comfortable leaving them in a room alone
together.
• Teach your older child how to gently touch and
cuddle your baby.
• Remind your older child not to throw things
around the baby, to keep small toys out of baby’s
reach and never put things in the baby’s mouth.
• Make sure your older child is seated when holding
a baby. Do not let your child walk while carrying
the baby.
• Emphasize that the older child should always
support your baby’s head.
• Teach proper use and safety around baby
equipment such as swings, strollers and bouncy
seats.
• Utilize audio monitors can be helpful for listening
to sibling interactions.
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