28 cReaTive wRiTing Lefty Donnie looked up at the lunar-like ceiling of spacelights that added to that morning’s world of white. The trolley hit a bump and he increased his grip on lefty. It was like the bump was a reminder of the fate that lay in store for lefty in about half an hour’s time. After 43 years of living together, sharing each milestone in his life, Donnie and lefty were parting company forever that morning. Donnie was scared. It had all began just over a fortnight ago with that most invasive of four letter words, ‘a lump’. The English language is full of four letter words but that word ‘lump’ has transcended literal meaning. There’d been no symptoms, no warnings, nothing, none of that, just a lump on lefty that couldn’t be wished away or justified by any sort of activity. It was there in the morning, and like the princess that no matter which way she turned or lay could always feel the pea in her bed, Donnie could always feel the lump. Donnie thought of that as the trolley waited for the lift to open. The nurse wanted to check his wristband, make sure she had the right patient, that sort of thing. Donnie had his right hand cradling lefty which entailed the nurse having to go and get it but she’d seen it many a time before. It’s alright … you’re not the first.’ And checked the band. ‘When’d you discover it?’ ‘late last week.’ ‘That’s good … time’s everything with these. you’d be surprised at how many just ignore it… leave ‘til it’s too late…hope that it will go away… that sort of thing…especially men.’ “ How lefty was the one that ‘hung low’ and how as many years ago he’d considered lefty as his barometer for a girl. Satisfied with what she’d checked she returned his hand to lefty. They’d laughed at that. His other hand was free, lying loose over his chest. She’d moved that to lefty also and they’d laughed more. Then she’d gone back to checking charts and he returned to his thoughts of lefty. Initially, he’d assumed that they’d just cut it, the lump, out and then when he learnt that everything on the left had to go, he’d accepted it pretty quickly because he’d just wanted that out, out, out of him, out of that inside of him forever. And everyone reassured him that because he’d got attention that he’d be fine, so much that he had himself convinced also and that’s when he became sorry for lefty. like he was abandoning a friend of old, someone who’d been there always, that half of a team that gave the complete backup. Donnie thought back to when he’d last held lefty with this sort of protection. It was a soccer match and the opposition had a free kick. He and lefty were the wall. The kicker didn’t like him. They’d had history throughout the match and he’d come across to say. ‘Hey Donnie, I don’t care about the goal but his ball’s taking your head off.’ Initially he’d held his arms over his face but at the penultimate moment just as the boot was coming into the leather he’d thought ‘What about Righty and lefty!! Forget the head… protect them nOW!’ and he had and they’d been very grateful. And then there was the time, Donnie’d been about 13 or so when lefty had disappeared after a cold swim and he’d told his Mother and his sisters had laughed and how he’d thought he was gone forever but like the faithful friend he was lefty had come back and now here was Donnie having him cut out. The lift opened and a team of white crowded over, questions, questions…name, date of birth, mother’s maiden name and all the faces were unfamiliar and he knew they were just checking to make sure they’d the right patient but Donnie just gripped lefty even more. And then the surgeon, Donnie knew him, ‘thank God’ … someone he knew…his jack-hammered heart relaxed, and then the anaesthetist. She was attractive, foreign looking, her hand on his chest, soothing: julIAN judGe issue 10 volume 12 • novemBeR 2010 Julian Judge qualified as a pharmacist in 1990. He has recently completed a Masters in Creative Writing at the Department of english at uCD. Contact Julian at email: julianjudge@hotmail.com ‘Breathe slowly and deeply.’ Said with a deep eastern-like accent as a mask descended over his mouth. ‘Think of something pleasant, far away and count to ten…you won’t beyond five.’ Said the exotic eastern throat and Donnie relaxed into a far away pleasant place and thought of lefty and 43 years of being together. How lefty was the one that ‘hung low’ and how as many years ago he’d considered lefty as his barometer for a girl. If lefty didn’t respond she could forget about it and he’d go find another for him, how crossing his legs, although easier would never be the same again, nothing to adjust. Donnie got to three and had an immediate thought of ‘this was it, time to say goodbye to lefty.’ Initially he was panicked: just how was he to say goodbye to a testicle? He heard: ‘Slow and deeply…that’s it.’ Again and the answer came to him. So, somewhere between four and five in his count Donnie relaxed his grip and gave lefty one last scratch. Author’s note. A friend of mine, 43 years old, otherwise completely healthy, recently discovered a lump on his left testicle. He had it removed last week and is now waiting on biopsy results. The main symptom of testicular cancer is a swelling or lump on one of your testicles. The lump is usually completely painless, no matter how small. Other symptoms are a swelling in either ball, discomfort or heaviness or a dull ache in the groin. For further information visit www.cancer.ie or phone National Cancer Helpline at 1800-200-700.
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