2004 05 MAY RAG - RAG Magazine

HARRY POTTERand the Prisoner of AzkabanDaniel Radcliffe, Emma Thompson, Gary OldmanDirected by: Alfonso CuaronWarner Brothers, PGHarry Potter and his crew have returned to Hogwarts Academyto experience yet another year of spells, potions, andeventual doom. It isn’t long before everyone is made keenlyaware of the dangers that are lurking within the shadows ofHogwarts: Sirius Black (a Prisoner of Azkaban convicted ofkilling dozens of people, including Potter’s parents) has escaped.Rumor has it that Black is on the lookout for Harry Potter,and not in a good way. As the school’s security is heightened,the soul-sucking Dementors (Azkaban prison guards) hoverover every door and window, just lying-in-wait for Sirius Blackto turn up, so they can do with him what they will.Though I have long been a fan of the Chris Columbus-helmedPotter movies, the moment I discovered that the gloriousGary Oldman had been cast to embody the mysterious Black,and the controversial Alfonso Cuaron had been dared todirect, I felt that this was going to be the crème-de-la-crèmeof movie-making magic. Well, so much for Harry Potter’s“so-called” undefeatable wizardry. Even Potter, himself,could not save this film from a perplexing Hollywood spell. First andforemost, gone are the magnificent color palettes last seen jumping outand grabbing us in the first two films. Gone too is the apparent interest inany other character, except for Harry. Rupert Grint’s Ron is lost in the mix;no seriously, he simply vanishes for two-thirds of the movie (and that’s nota plot point). Emma Watson’s Hermonie makes her way on screen, thoughit’s largely in a sidekick role, merely providing someone for Harry to con-THE STEPFORD WIVESNicole Kidman, Matthew Broderick, Christopher WalkenDirected by: Frank OzParamount Pictures, PG-13As the film’s tagline boldly asserts: the wives of Stepford have a secret. But don’t let Nicole Kidman“shushing you” on film’s poster fool you: Glenn Close is the star of this wildly, twisted comedy-drama.Close portrays Claire Wellington, a modern-day Suzy Homemaker who single-handedly runs theshow within the picketed fences, manicured lawns, and colossal mansions of Stepford, Connecticut.Wellington organizes “the wives” daily activities –from quasi-exercising, to competitive baking, tohow a Stepford wife is “supposed” to look, act, and obey, all while catering to their husband’s everyneed. 2004’s The Stepford Wives is more of an updated mockery of its 1975 evil-driven predecessor,whose central theme was for the men of Stepford to replace their independent, intelligent, normallookingwives with robotic interpretations of the idealistic spouse. That is, one who is skinny andbeautiful and cooks, cleans, and services her husband without any complaints or regard for her ownwell-being or aspirations. This new and improved version of The Stepford Wives comes to life as alargely comical vehicle, aimed mostly to scoff at the absurdity of the original book (by Ira Levin) andinitial theatrical release, though some portions of the film do celebrate its contemptible treatment ofwomen (as made evident by many men heard laughing in the theater, while no doubt secretly wishingthis were a possible reality). Kidman and Broderick are an exhausted New York couple looking for abreather in the soft and gentle world of Connecticut. Kidman’s Joanna was a once high-powered,egotistical female executive who constantly succeeded in the male-dominated world of televisionproduction. That is, until a reality TV wacko that she cast, nearly guns her down, as well as theauditorium full of executives she’s addressing. Joanna’s quick and sassy and it doesn’t take long forher to realize that something is terribly wrong with the women of Stepword, but is it too late to saveherself from the same cruel, imminent fate? Antics aside, you should definitely make it a point to visitStepford; creepiness not withstanding, it is a community chock-full of acting talent – including anenchanting Christopher Walken, a spot-on Bette Midler, a scene-stealing Roger Bart, a film debut byFaith Hill, and an understated (is that possible?) Matthew Broderick. It that doesn’t get you, considerthis: it’s directed by Frank Oz (a.k.a Miss Piggy). Now that has got to be as far from a Stepford wifeas you can get! Hi-yah!verse. Potter’s nemesis, Draco Malfoy, shows up long enough to piss offour lovable trio of Harry, Hermoine, and Ron, and then he’s relegated to thebackground along with Maggie Smith’s Professor McGonagall (who’s givenseconds of screen time at best) and Michael Gambon’s Dumbledore (whodoes what he can when asked to fill the worldly shoes of the late RichardHarris).As for the much-anticipated appearance of GaryOldman, well, his screen time is limited to his CGIladenmug on the cover of the local newspaper.Other than that, his highly publicized addition isminimal at best (he doesn’t materialize until the thirdact). Oldman is one of the best actors in the businessand it’s a shame that he’s wasted in such anonexistent role. Even more depressing is theperformance of David Thewlis as Professor Lupin.Thewlis’ acting is downright repulsive, whichreally would not have bothered me, had he notbeen a major character. Rumors have circulatedthat the charismatic Jude Law had been eyed forthis role; I can only imagine how magnificently hewould have chewed the scenery had the “powers-that-be”been able to work that out. Therefore,the only standout performance here is that ofEmma Thompson’s crazy “tea-leaf reading” ProfessorTrelawney. That being said, Robbie Crane’sRubeus Hagrid does provide ample plot stewingantics and Alan Rickman’s Professor Snape is as prickly as ever, yet histalents demand a juicier role. Nevertheless, the agonizing question thatkept circulating through my mind was: where-oh-where was that adorablesorting hat and the myriad of the once-epitomized and innovative specialeffects that Harry Potter fans have come to expect? Perhaps Mike Newell, thedirector of the next installment “Goblet of Fire,” should have Harry Potter wavehis magic wand over its script before they begin shooting.JULY 2004 • RAG MAGAZINE • 49