Clergy Spouse Handbook - Wisconsin Conference United Methodist ...

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HANDBOOK 2010 submitted.docPage 10 of 51 PagesCare, Procedure for Approval of Repairs and Maintenance, Local Church Responsibilities, PastorResponsibilities, and Guidelines for Housing Allowances.When you live in a parsonage, it becomes your home. The church owns the house andgrounds, but is your home for the duration of your stay and not an extension of the churchbuilding. It is important to be a good steward of the parsonage and outside areas. When repairs orother work are needed, it is important to report that fact to the appropriate person or committeeas soon as possible so the work can be completed in a timely fashion. It may be helpful to keep adated copy of your written report or request for future reference.2. What You Can ExpectWhen you move into your home, you should find a clean house awaiting you. It is helpfulto visit the home on your initial visit to the prospective church and again at a later time beforemoving. You may want to take pictures or videos of the rooms and note room dimensions. If younotice problems at either of these times or when you move in, contact the Chair of the SPRC,Board of Trustees and/or the Parsonage CommitteeSection 60.5.0 of the Clergy Housing Policy, states that there should be an annualinspection of the parsonage and grounds. (See section of Journal noted above regarding theAnnual Inspection of Equipment.) The Annual Inspection is important for the clergy and familyand the local church to keep current on upkeep as part of a long-term maintenance plan.3. What the Church ExpectsYou will bring your own furniture and any appliances you want beyond the minimumrequirements. (Refer to the Minimum Requirement section regarding appliances, windowcovering room size, etc.)4. Parsonage Family ResponsibilityYou are expected to clean the home you are leaving. Your new home should be cleaned by theprevious family and/or the local church. In most cases, utilities will be connected. You wouldneed to arrange for cable or satellite television and computer connections, and check on local andlong distance telephone service. In the past it has been customary for departing families to leavethe telephone service intact because it was billed to the church. Only a name change would berequired. Therefore, this should be discussed with both your “former” and “future” churchofficers before your move.5. Relating to SPRC, Trustees and/or Parsonage CommitteeReport any needed repairs as soon as possible to the appropriate person.Support the annual inspection of the parsonage for the benefit of your family and the localchurch. It is helpful for the clergy person and the appropriate committee to develop a plan forparsonage maintenance, including short and long range repairs and improvements. The MovingDirector has told us that there are instances where the pastor has refused to allow or discouragedan inspection and cases where the local Trustees have failed to make annual inspections. This hasresulted in the “discovery” at the end of the appointment that there are severe deficiencies in thephysical status of the parsonage and/or severe pet damage, inadequate house cleaning, etc. Apartfrom the ill-will engendered, the last-minute delays required to prepare the parsonage for thenext clergy family can create scheduling delays across the entire conference.
HANDBOOK 2010 submitted.docPage 11 of 51 PagesB. Life with Your Children in the Church and Community1. Moving to your new homeThe appointment has been set, you are finishing the packing, and you will be arriving in yournew home with children. (The following resources at the end of this section may be helpful toyou before and during your move: “A Moving Experience: Resources for Children and Parents:A Brief List,” “Helpful Hints for Moving with Children,” and the web pagewww.movingcompaniesusa.net/family_guide/teenagers.) As members of the clergy family, youand your children will experience many joys and concerns during the moving process andthroughout your time in a church and community. If it would be helpful to you and your family,take your children with you on your initial visit. If this is not practical for you, plan to takepictures or videos of the house, church, school and other parts of the community for yourchildren. You may want to plan a visit to the new community as soon as this can be arranged.Assure older elementary children and teenagers that they can stay in contact with friends throughphone calls, emails, letters and visits if appropriate. Encourage children of all ages to pack a boxwith their special possessions so that they can unpack these soon after you arrive at your newhome.2. Sharing thoughts and feelings about the moveAs we know from moving to a new church and community, this is a very stressful time foreveryone in the family. Older children and teenagers will experience a range of emotionsincluding anger at you and your spouse during and following the move. It is important to makethe time to listen to your children’s feelings about moving. As much as you are able, share yourfeelings with your spouse and family. Family meetings and family devotion would be possibletimes to share your thoughts and feelings. It may be helpful to you to talk with Clergy friendswithin the Conference, other friends, or trusted members of your extended family. Theadjustment time is longer for some than for others. Allow yourself and your family the time youneed to become comfortable in your new church and community.3. Children of all agesFrom toddlers to teenagers, your children may be a focus of attention for your congregation.Remember to be an advocate for your children. Be watchful that members of the congregation donot make unreasonable demands because your children are part of the clergy family. As youdecide how to share your gifts in a local congregation, guide your children as they become moreinvolved in your local church and their faith journey. Talk with your children about beingfaithful Christians and how this is important in your life and the life of your spouse. Yourchildren may find it helpful to establish and maintain friendships with other children in clergyfamilies. This will help them to share their feelings and experiences.4. Participation as part of a multiple chargeYour family will need to decide in which church you will be active participants. It may behelpful to for you and/your spouse to share your decision with the SPRC chair and/or committee.You will find different ways to be connected with the other churches, including attending jointworship services and other study or fellowship events.
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