Settling In Palmerston North and Feilding - Human Rights Commission

there were more people in the same situation, all missing their families and supporting each other. Once kids were at school there wereother families from the same country and lots more support – needs differ with age and stage of children.’• ‘Homesick’• ‘Loneliness – NZ is a very lonely place without family’• ‘Lack of family support’• ‘Lack of support from extended family’• ‘Starting from scratch in a new environment.’• ‘I haven’t really had any worries – have been accepted well. More social networking would be good I think.’Accessing Services and Support• ‘Need extra help for disabled son’• ‘Children – parents reported they felt better as soon as children were integrated and settled’• ‘Parents feel helpless when children have problems’• ‘lack of connections’• ‘Difficult to find childcare and go to work – especially with night jobs/shift work’• ‘Students who brought their families have to consider the distance between the rental properties with the schools for their children.’• ‘Some of us still have dependant children back home, this makes it very difficult to split our resources to take care of them. When onepartner gets a minimum wage job and therefore earns just over the threshold allowed by WINZ, benefits for both partners are cut and thefamily is actually worse off – removes incentive to independence.’Family Reunification• ‘Lack of any kind of support from relatives due to immigration issues. Even when the means are available to cater for them.’• ‘I’d like it to be easier for family members to also emigrate to NZ.’• ‘One day … Win money (eg lotto) so they can send money to their relatives in Cambodia, and give to charity.’• ‘Strengthen existing families who are already in NZ by bringing in family members who can contribute to the NZ society ...’• ‘To have more flexibility for family re-unification and for visitors visa to allow more extended family to come to NZ.’• ‘Trying to convince New Zealand Immigration the need of allowing genuine relatives and visitors to come and visit their relatives (us). It issometimes petty to log a visa application and get the reply one year later!!!!’• ‘Family reunification (coming relatives should be placed near to us).’• ‘Families – a majority expressed concern about difficulties they meet when inviting members of their extended families for a visit.’Family Activities• ‘when feel like a walk in the evenings there is nowhere to go as a “destination”.’• ‘Not much evening family entertainment.’• ‘A very small community’• ‘I want more playgrounds!’ William, 9• ‘They still missed the larger Indonesian extended families, lots of gettogethers, missed the social things. Weekends are very quiet, whereasin Indonesia they could go out at any time and there is always a“destination”.’• ‘Not much evening family entertainment.’• ‘Often families (of international students) remain isolated from everyonein the city.’• ‘Parents would like supermarkets, shop malls, gyms, swimming pools,etc … to have supervised playgrounds (small or large).’New Zealand Norms – Intergenerational Issues• ‘Divorce does not exist in my country’Facilitators meeting - February 2009• ‘Bringing up my kids not to be alcoholic or drug user!’• ‘Parenting system. Parents struggle with the way to punish children.’• ‘Don’t understand how doctors can prescribe “pills” to teenager without parents knowledge, letting the teenagers to make decision forthemselves, to have free sex, and the system support it. But when the children get into problems ie. pregnancy, drug and alcohol, it is theparents who have to take responsible. So where is the logic?’• ‘Blended families.’• ‘Premarital pregnancies is widespread and is part of the society norm.’• ‘Her children come home and talk about there are no kids in school with their “real” parents.’• ‘Family support – children should have limitations on going out with friends. Suicide and getting pregnant at very young age or use of drugscan be avoided if family or parent is giving good moral support to their children’• ‘NEED PARENTING SKILLS how to deal with teenager son’• ‘They handled all the issues as a family, step by step, and had open and frank discussions with their children. Aided by the fact that theyhad Kiwi families eg grandparents, and cousins.’• ‘Belief – children should be brought up on God’s word so they will grow with respect to their parents and older ones.’SETTLING IN PALMERSTON NORTH AND FEILDING45