The Good Life - January/February 2014

ChivalrY
in the 21 st Century
BRINGING IT BACK TO LIFE
Chivalry is dead.
Now, wait a second. That’s not entirely true. If I’m
wearing heels, at least a few guys will open a door for
me. If I’m wearing tennis shoes or flats, the chance of
that happening drops 80 percent. The wretched part is
that I’m not even kidding.
If you Google the word “chivalry,” and
visit thefreedictionary.com, you’ll read
that chivalry describes “The qualities
idealized by knighthood, such as
bravery, courtesy, honor, and
gallantry toward women,” along
with “A manifestation of any of
these qualities.”
Some things should remain
in the past, like outhouses and
dial-up Internet, but when it
comes to practicing courtesy,
both men and women need to
revive and encourage its existence.
Manners and chivalry go hand in
hand, and being polite doesn’t mean
you’re boring.
I’m going to tell you all a little tale. It’s
tender, surprising and even sad. No, it’s not an ABC
Family movie. This is less predictable.
Once upon a time, I went on a date with a nice guy.
He wouldn’t let me get into his carriage, I mean, car until
he got out of it and opened the passenger door for me.
He did the same when we arrived at the restaurant. I
REMINDER:
February 14th
is Valentine’s Day.
Now is your chance
to be
chivalrous!
think he even helped me take my coat off. Was I drooling
from his acts of thoughtfulness? No, I was weirded out.
Wait. What? Yeah. I was taken aback by his manners.
I was used to being treated like one of the guys, not
like a lady. I was so accustomed to a lack of courtesy
that I didn’t know how to react when faced with such
politeness. Many guys and girls have never had
manners pounded in their head, or they’ve
just decided to ignore them, and
“chivalry,” that thing we’ve heard
about in fairytales, is often seen as
archaic by our lazy, dishonorable
society.
It took me a few years of
recovering from the I-shouldn’task-for-help-because-I’m-awoman-hear-me-roar
rut to
realize that women don’t have
to be weak-minded, annoyingly
dependent damsels in distress in
order to enjoy being treated like a
lady. You won’t see me crying, waiting
for a big, strong man to carry me over
a puddle (though that would be nice), but
appreciating when a man is courteous, thoughtful and
even protective doesn’t make me any weaker of a woman.
As this apropos phrase says, “A real woman can do it all
by herself, but a real man won’t let her.”
Whether you’re a real man or a fake one, according
to that saying, the point of that statement is to be
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By: meghan feir