The Soft Issue (v.15)

Volume 15 The Soft Issue Fall 2017

photography
Jennifer Carrillo
Saul G. Hodgers
Keynan Johnson
words
Anaiah Lupton
Emerson Price
Diego Medina
Keynan Johnson
good eats
Andie Fuller
editors
Darnell Thomas
Mariah Romero
illustration & design
Lydia Abernathy
Diego Medina
Mariah Romero
cover photography by Jennifer Carrillo | cover design by Mariah Romero

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hello
Here at 1905 Magazine we believe that there is power in softness. Fall is the time
where change is very present and it is happening right in front of our eyes. This
season we want our readers to explore their soft side instead of spending so much of
our time trying to keep up this facade and resisting anything that exudes emotions.
For this issue we want to inspire our readers to be comfortable with being soft spoken,
soft mannered and get in touch with those vulnerable sides that we hide from
the world. Enjoy!
Darnell & Mariah
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CURIO
Jennifer Carrillo | Curio x 1905
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EDITOR’S WISHLIST (PAPER DOLLS)
Lydia Abernathy
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STYLE PROFILE
Jeremy Salazar
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SOFTNESS
Anaiah Lupton

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CUTE & PASTE
Saul G. Hodgers
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UNTITLED
Keynan Johnson
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INSTAGRAM MY HEART
Emerson Price
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TURKISH LATTE
Andie Fuller
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NO SE MUERE
Diego Medina
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photography by Jennifer Carrillo | clothing by Curio | directed by 1905 Magazine | model,
Mackenzie Sawyer
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photographer, Hayley Rheagan | art direction, Darnell Thomas | model, Diego Medina
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illustration by Lydia Abernathy
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illustration by Lydia Abernathy

photography by Jennifer Carrillo | clothing design by Jeremy Salazar | models: Jeremy Salazar, Breana
Gonzales & Sofia Resnik
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MEET JEREMY SALAZAR
WHAT’S YOUR BACKGROUND?
I was born 1994 in the South Valley of Albuquerque, NM and was
brought up into gang and drug culture. Later in my teenage years I got
introduced to skateboarding and that opened me up to a different life
style. I never had any experience in fashion but always recognized the
unique styles skateboarders and gang members had. That pushed me to
create my own look before I knew what a designer or artist was.
WHAT DO YOU DO?
I am a fashion art wear designer, photographer, film maker
and skateboarder
HOW DOES NEW MEXICAN CULTURE INFLUENCE YOUR
WORK/STYLE?
I would say it’s the magic in the desert that forces me to look inward. I
feel like that energy creates the culture here naturally. There are not many
places to look for influence rather than nature itself, it’s beautiful out here.
WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO BE A DESIGNER?
Skateboarding culture inspired me to be a designer. It started off with my
clothes ripping up from skating and not being able to afford clothes so I
taught myself how to sew them back together. Plus skateboarding is filled
with such diverse styles.
WHO ARE YOUR FAVORITE DESIGNERS RIGHT NOW?
Matty Bovan, Yoyo Nasty, Dapper Dan and Jeremy Scott.
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IF YOU COULD DELETE ONE TREND FROM THIS
PLANET, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
It’s this trend in skateboarding, people have been tying there sweaters
from one shoulder diagonally to their hip, it’s like a crooked cape. And I
just don’t get it?
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR OF THE MOMENT?
It must be orange because I’ve been incorporating orange foods into my
diet lately and now wearing them. It’s something in the air, Trick or Treat!
THREE WORDS TO DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONAL STYLE?
Future, festival, punk.
DO YOU LISTEN TO MUSIC WHILE YOU WORK? WHAT’S
ON YOUR PLAYLIST RIGHT NOW?
Yes I do! I enjoy working in silence as well. My playlist right now consists
of these jams. A$ap Ferg-Nandos, TwoLips-Yellow Gold, Khalisol-What’s
The Move.
DO YOU CONSIDER CURRENT TRENDS WHILE DESIGNING?
I think unconsciously I do because I’m always studying fashion. But I try
to either transform the trend or do the complete opposite of it.
WHAT’S NEXT?
I want to do more travelling around the U.S and outside the country to
meet up with other models and creators to continue building a community
and inspire one another. It’s our time.
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soft
ness
by Anaiah Lupton
Have you ever been told to use your “indoor voice”? Have you ever been told to use
your “lady voice”, or perhaps been hushed when you were too passionate and ruffled?
What about the other side of this, have you ever been told to “let your voice be
heard” or to make plain by using a booming tone? We are taught to behave relative
to the environment we are in, but what can do you do if your behavior does not line
up with your environment? What if the environment you are in induces a different
reaction than what is socially acceptable? I have witnessed this exchange second
hand from my friend who often finds herself in situations that calls for an energetic
and lively response. She, however is often quiet and calm, like a steady lighthouse
in an oceanic ferocity. At times, her quiet nature is is questioned for not rebelling
against stereotypes and social constructs around quiet femininity, or stoicism is mistaken
for weakness. To address this dynamic we first must look at the way in which
these actions or reactions are socially constructed. The social constructs around
speech variation are associated with gender, race, and age. We are taught to confine
to these social constructs, situations vary, environments change, and the complexity
of human nature often rebels against what is socially acceptable. It is these moments
of rebellion which intrigue me. However, rebellion too varies and people combat
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Cute & Paste: photography by Saul G. Hodgers | creative direction by Adrie
Lagarda model: Alejandra de la Torre | make up & Hair: Fernanda Valenzuela
nails by Ilse Mendez
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their societal pressures in unique and mysterious ways. One example which I often
refer to is my friend Aisha. Aisha is incredibly artistic, opinionated, cynical, and
spontaneous. Her name translates to something like “alive and well” or “lively”.
These qualities along with the meaning of her name would warrant the image of a
loud, or outspoken individual. However, Aisha is incredibly soft spoken. Her energy
level is low and docile. She has soft physical features, dresses down, and spends a lot
of time to herself. This contrast intrigues me because I realized that I often associate
a soft spoken nature with a soft reaction to their environment. When I told this
to Aisha she coined the infamous phrase “Don’t mistake the meek for the weak”.
Aisha’s rebellious beliefs and art are expressed in a gentle way because she wants
to change the environment around her rather than let the environment change her.
Rather than speaking up, speaking loudly, or booming she seeks validation on her
own terms. “If people want to listen, they will”. I pushed the issue a bit further and
asked her about her experience as a woman and how her soft spoken nature may
have fed into stereotypes around speaking in a “ladylike” voice. She sat in silence
for a moment. I felt the room grow quiet, the silence build, and the softness of her
essence began to bloom. “I don’t think there is anything wrong with being ladylike,
or being quiet. Those are not the qualities that need to be changed to be treated
equally. Instead we must change the associations we have around those qualities. I
wanted to be treated equally for who I am rather than go against my nature to meet
a standard or fit a mold to be treated equally.” We sat in the quiet for a bit longer,
and then longer, and longer. This is how most of our conversations go. It’s funny
because I have heard these interactions described as love, that you know you have
found love when you can be in the presence of another, in silence and not feel that
tinge of awkwardness or tension. If we know love can be found in silence what else
can can be found, or what other strengths and rebellions are hidden in the softest,
quietest places.
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Untitled
Your skin bathed in a hue amaryless
rival to the moon’s eye on Mozambique,
sings the glory of the Nile
cherishes the precious
cotton
copper
cocoa.
ever enchanted Youniverse
sing back to earth mother, first mother
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poem & art by Keynan Johnson

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INSTAGRAM MY HEART
by Emerson Price
I’m tired of people calling me soft for calling my
mom mommy as if they’ve never had a nickname
for someone they love; like they’ve never
had a girlfriend that sleeps with a stuffed animal
at night; or like they haven’t cried them-self to
sleep before. (If you haven’t you should try it)
Soft haters are as tough as my one hundred and
fifty dollar memory foam mattress. They are as
durable as the plastic ruler they measure us with.
Big Brother is more like baby brother wearing
older brothers t-shirt begging mommy and daddy
for attention while we’re stuck holding his
hand and wiping his butt. Maybe we can just
gingerly pat him on the head and just reassure
him in a soft comforting voice that “everything
is going to be okay little buddy” while we take
command of this crashing vehicle.
What’s so hard about being soft, huh? Is it that
you’re afraid of being walked over? Is it because
you take yourself too seriously? You’re afraid of
being rare? If Being Soft was a band would you
buy tickets? Would you want to hear their words
dance across the lobes of your ears like whispers
from your favorite actor or writer. Chances are
you’ve already been to a concert or listened to
a song by an artist who is soft and you didn’t
even revel in the moment. Shame. Maybe even
just before sitting down to read this you caught
a glance of someone across the room and for a
moment you thought “did that really just happen?”
Not because you were horny or flirting
but because their eyes were soft and for a second
you remembered you only human.
Can we please stop pretending like being hard
is cute because its starting to get really exhausting.
So many people have died in their “hard
ass” wake that at this point watching the TV
pundits play “hardball” is starting to feel like
flat out murder. This isn’t a video game, okay?
You can’t just re spawn.
to just be and they’ve made it hard for black
and brown, gay and trans youth, and women
and men to live. As they continue to be soft on
people who think how they think we are finding
out they Nazis have a found a home here in
America. It’s like a sick joke. Neo-Nazis have
felt at home in America. And this whole time
we on the other side have been treated like the
paranoid spouse; waking up late at night asking
“what’s that noise!?” and being reassured
that “It’s nothing just go back to sleep”. Pass. I
heard something, didn’t you?
These past few years that I’ve come into my
adulthood I’ve heard a lot of things and I’ve
learned a lot of things. I learned that those
people who called me soft when I was younger
were soft too. For the longest time I tried to
prove how tough I was by acting like my words
didn’t matter. Someone once asked why do you
choose to be so mean all the time. To which I responded
“I don’t know” and I tried to explain.
It’s like I don’t know any other way to handle
someone when they make me upset other than
being mean. There’s something literally inside
of me saying don’t be nice! Maybe I think it’s
funny or maybe I just lack a certain level of
empathy. I want to be soft but my actions have
proved time and time that to the ones I care for
the most; I’m an hardboiled egg. You can crack
my shell and make me cry but that yolk is going
to be really nasty. No matter how much cocoa
butter I apply for some reasons hands are still
dry and cracked. Maybe it’s just a part of my
DNA, because for me it is really tough to be soft
sometimes. You guys are the real MVP.
So that being said I would like to enter a pact,
a science experiment if you will. Help me make
the world a better place by starting with being
soft on one another. I hear it’s easy as making
the choice right now. Should we do it?
A lot of us have been to hell and back trying
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What’s so hard
about being soft, huh?
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Turkish Latte
recipe by Andie Fuller | photographer, Andie Fuller
It’s that time of year. The air is brisk in the morning and we’re saying
goodbye to daylight sooner every evening.The Autumn colors are
starting to show, and our need to slow down is evident.
It’s the perfect time to incorporate more thoughtful things in our
lives, like this Turkish Latte. The extra time it takes to make in the
morning will surely set your feet in the right direction all day. It’s
great hot or cold, whole milk or almond - all the spices and warm
honey will just light up your life, I promise.
All the love,
Andie
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Ingredients & Instructions
What you need
2 Tablespoons honey
½ teaspoon ground cardamom
¼ teaspoon cinnamon
¼ teaspoon nutmeg
Dash of clove
¼ cup milk of choice (whole, half and half, almond etc..)
1 cup freshly brewed coffee
What you do
Put honey and spices in glass large enough to also hold brewed coffee
Brew coffee, (I like doing a pour over).
When coffee is ready pour over honey/spice mixture, stir to combine
Add coffee/honey/spice mixture to milk of choice, if serving cold be
sure to add your ice!
Stir, sip and enjoy all the warm and fuzzy feelings from this 100% drink
Fill almost all the way with ginger beer, add remaining ice cubes
Give it a good stir and ENJOY!
There’s something comforting about spices in the colder months, they
warm up our spirits. I hope you try this one out and that it warms up
your day, wherever and whatever you’re doing.
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no se muere
poem & art by Diego Medina
while the kernels are soaking
i think about the huitlacoche
that could have been.
i think about all the primer
grey cars I’ve ever seen.
the crushed shells all together
speeding through a yellow
light in the middle of summer
or pulling out of a circle k with the windows down
chirping over the curb like a cricket
or getting shielded by pigweed by the side of a trailer
next to the crickets.
all year i wait for posole
like light waits for shadows.
i wait for it to cool down
enough to want to warm my body up
with something i have to wait for
to cool down
i wait for the ash to break
down the skin
of the kernels
to prime them like pearls
And smooth them out like a fresh
slab of concrete.
patience through the senility of water
as it repeats the same story to you
over and over
like thunder
each time a different rumble.
the edges of memories get rounded off
like a rock in a riverbed
becoming as smooth as a greyhound
slicing through air as it runs.
all things soften overtime.
a rock in the riverbed
Becomes as smooth
as a greyhound
slicing through air
as it runs.
the way the edges of memories get
rounded
off,
the senility of water making scars out of stones.
scars are always the softest parts
of the skin.
like leathering clay
that no longer sticks to your fingers.
the transgressions of nature being pardoned by other nature.
nixtamal.
it cuts out the wild toungues
until all words are healed.
and with voiceless years
a scab on land that was always indian
is ready to fall off.
the husk is opening to the light
that kisses every new love
with the courtesy of never
sharing what it’s been through.
it’s the light that has to bring its own shadows
and i think shadows are just sleeping
light
sometimes caught sleepless.
this is where huitlacoche
comes from.
it paper maches itself
within the husk
at the edge of light and dark
and softens both
enough to hold back
tension.
enough to hold back.
the friction of any border can only soften over time.
night never fallls without a fight.
i check on the kernels and
then start placing
picked squash blossoms
into little bags to save for tomorrow.
out the window i hear crickets
and i notice the light change
in the sky.
the sun peels itself
out of the sky
like a scab.
a primer grey civic glides down
the road
and i look at it
only to see that
the passenger door is held
together with bailing wire.
rasquache.
the civic turns into a trailer park
creeps around a corner
out of sight as the whole
barrio
smelling like posole
gets
curled into the
arm of a squash blossom.

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The Soft Issue
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