CCChat-Magazine_3

I often get men and women reminding
me that men can be victims of
woman’s abuse.
I understand where they are coming
from and of course this form of abuse
is wrong however I sometimes just
want individuals to be able to talk
about men’s violence without having to
focus on woman’s violence. For me it’s
important we separate it.
First thing is not to panic. This is more
about being a friend than having to be
a crime fighter. It’s not your job to
solve this, your role is to be there and
ask the question.
Statements such as “Is everything ok?
I’ve noticed (behaviour/injury). It
looks like something has happened.
You didn’t deserve this.”
Being a bystander to any difficult
situation is going to be difficult
therefor it’s important we think about
our actions if it happened for real. Ask
yourself what’s the alternative if you
do nothing?
“I sometimes just want individuals to be able to talk about men’s
violence without having to focus on woman’s violence.”
If you suspected a friend of yours
of being a victim of violence, how
would you broach the subject, if
at all?
It’s so important that we all start to see
a role in the prevention of violence.
Violence has the potential to be deeply
personal to each and everyone of us.
Victims of violence need our support.
They need to know that they have done
nothing wrong and didn’t deserve their
victimisation.
When it comes to incidences of
domestic and sexual violence this is
vital. These crimes involve power and
control being taken away from victims.
It’s vital we know that we all have the
ability to give some of this power back.
I previously wrote this blog on when a
friend discloses sexual violence. It’s still
very relevant -
https://ggoulden.wordpress.com/2016/
12/05/so-you-want-to-help-heres-how/
( cut and paste into browser)
And what if you thought the friend
was the abuser?
I’m so glad you asked this question. The
ongoing Harvey Weinstein case suggests
that many people around Weinstein knew
what was happening but did nothing.
What does this say to Weinstein?
It gives a form of consent to his actions
and adds to his power. I do however
accept that it can be difficult to challenge
a friend and see a need for us to talk more
about this and provide individuals with
options and ways that this can be done
safely.
CCChat Magazine - Making the Invisible Visible