Viva Lewes Issue #159 December 2019

TRIPS AND BOBS
THE GROUP
OPPORTUNITIES TO GATHER
“My husband and I
used to run a Sussex
pub together”, Patricia
Bentley tells me.
“After we split up, in
2000, I became aware
of just how many single
people there were,
and over a certain age.
Many emerge from
marriages, after the children have left home.”
So in 2006, Patricia started The Group, in a pub
in Haywards Heath. And it’s still going strong.
“Today we have about 300 members, but we
always welcome new faces. I’ve made lots of
lovely, real friends through it, and been to events
I wouldn’t otherwise have thought to go to. And
it’s really nice too, seeing other people meet.”
There are monthly ‘Club nights’ in five venues
across Sussex – Lewes, Brighton, Horsham,
Burgess Hill and Worthing. In addition, there’s
a multitude of events organised by members:
walks, theatre trips, meals out, even holidays
(the picture is from one, in Montenegro). Members
get sent a twice monthly diary, and then are
free to approach individual organisers for any
events that interest them.
“That’s the beauty of the formula”, says Tricia.
“We have a committee of nine, some of whom
coordinate meetings – I run the Lewes one –
but this is just a framework. It’s our members
who fill the pages of the diary. It’s just putting
group members in touch.
“People join and leave all the time – which is part
of the fun, the rolling cast. At the moment, we’re
probably about 2:1 women to men. We’re geared
to the over 50s, and the unattached.”
The activities are varied, and reflect of course
the interests and skills of group members. “So,
one ran a pottery
class from her home.
Another, a coach
driver, offers group
trip transport…
There are walks
every weekend, which
are always popular –
one recently ended
at The Anchor in
Barcombe, and then we took the boats out. And
we have regular trips to London. And a golf
society!
“One coordinator, Maureen who runs the
Burgess Hill club nights, organises a holiday for
members every year.”
Patricia went on one holiday with The Group,
to Prague, she tells me. “And for the last five
years I’ve organised a trip to the Edinburgh
Festival every August… Which I would go to
anyway, but it’s fun opening it up to members.
We stay in university accommodation, and it’s
very comfortable, with en suite bathrooms.”
By day, Tricia is also a Celebrant – for the last
seven years, as an independent. She conducts
weddings, funerals and baby namings. It’s what
she retrained to do after she left the pub. “All
my work seems to have been about people, and
about relationships”, she smiles.
“The Group is not a dating agency, and plenty
of members, like me, don’t mind being on their
own, and doing things on their own. But it’s also
fun, sometimes, to join up with others…”
In Lewes, the club nights are every 4th Thursday
of the month, 8pm. “Except in December,
of course, because that would be Christmas!”
So, 28th November, or 23rd January…
Charlotte Gann
thegroup.org.uk
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