The Breeeze Janruary 2020

Sometimes a thing happens that is so awful,
so devastating, there is no way to make sense
of it. As Bluffton patches up its heart after
the Christmas parade tragedy, we can all
take comfort in the collective strength of our
“helpers,” those who rally in our darkest hour.
“Always look for the helpers,” said legendary
children’s show host Mr. Rogers, paraphrasing
his mother’s advice when, as a little boy, he
was disturbed by catastrophes on the news.
“You will always find people who are helping.
If you look for the helpers, you’ll know there
is hope.”
We are fortunate that here in Bluffton we
don’t have to look too far. Despite tremendous
growth the last few years, this town is still
small enough to care. Who didn’t feel a gut-
punch when they heard about the loss of a
sweet innocent, and an outpouring of spirit
toward the family? But folks didn’t stop at
just feeling — they stirred to action. They
cooked meals, raised funds, and organized
a candlelight vigil attended by well-wishers
who came out in droves to lend love and
support. Whether they understood because
they’d been through something similar, or
they could scarcely imagine, they were there
because Bluffton has a heart.
Life is so fragile. These physical bodies are
vulnerable to time, the elements, and every
sort of disaster imaginable. The hour awaits
us all, and our loved ones as well, yet nothing
truly prepares us for what we can hardly bear
even to think about. When suffering a great
loss
we have our spiritual and existential
beliefs to fall back on, which are deeply
personal and vary from individual to individual.
But allowing for our different faiths, the only
objective, verifiable, self-evident truth is this:
the person was here, and now they are gone.
For those left under the crushing burden of
that grief, struggling even to breath, the balm
of pure love is essential.
We can never take away their pain or close
over the wound in an instant like we would
wish, but we can help heal it slowly with
our kindness, care, sincere presence, and
recognition of the bond we share in the human
condition. Because whatever someone else is
going through today, it may just as well be
any of us tomorrow. From this universal truth
proceeds real empathy.
Perhaps we don’t directly know those involved
in a particular tragedy; maybe we didn’t reach
out. Yet our hearts have been touched and we
want to act. One way is by doing random acts
of kindness as a memorial: in the name of the
lost, we can buy coffee for the person behind
us in line, leave a gas card at the pump, tuck
a gift in the box for our mail carrier, bring
goodies and flowers to our local fire rescue
squad or nurses station. The people whose day
we made brighter may never know what we
had on our mind, but our own hearts will grow
a little gladder knowing we turned something
horrible into some-thing good. And we must
always, ALWAYS love those near and dear to
us, without conditions or grudges, but taking
time tTo be truly present for them, because
we don’t always get to say goodbye.
Thank you Bluffton, for
being a town with a heart.
#HEARTOFTHELOWCOUNTRY
To show tangible support to the
family, visit any area SunTrust
bank or donate online at:
paypal.me/AmeerFrazier
45