CEAC-2020-10-October

Boiler Room Annex
The Unemployed Engineer
Source: quora.com
An engineer who was unemployed for a long time decided
to open a medical clinic. He put a sign outside the clinic:
“Cure for your ailment guaranteed at $500 — $1,000 if we
fail.” A doctor thinks this is a good opportunity to earn
$1,000 and goes to his clinic.
Doctor: “I have lost my sense of taste.”
Engineer: “Nurse, please bring the medicine from box 22 and
put three drops in the patient’s mouth.”
Doctor: “This is gasoline!” Engineer: “Congratulations!
You’ve got your taste back. That will be $500.”
The Doctor gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of
days later to recover his money.
Doctor: “I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything.”
Engineer: “Nurse, please bring the medicine from box 22 and
put three drops in the patient’s mouth.”
Solution:
S I T E S F E D A C V N O D O Z
A R E N A L I T U R G I E S A L I B I
L I M E S E R A D I C A T E S E V E N
T S P S B W S O Y A H A E S C
S H O D I D E A O S L O P R E S
K G B R P M C W A T N T
B U R R R E A C H E D E A T S
E A T A F C I O U I W O U M P
O C T B R A S N O B S M A N B O A
S H E D I S S U E S A G A S A B L Y
E R N S U M M U G K I D
A L M A B A N A L C O M E S A N E W
L O O P I T C O C O A R U T E R A
I R S A N T G N P Y E A S E C
S T O P C L A S S I C P T S D
B A T P I N E M U E E L
D E M I A G U E P T A S C L U B
A L A S B E S S T U P S A S L
K A Y A K L I B E R A T O R L I T H E
A T A L E T R O P I C A N A A C H E S
R E N E W E X T T I E P E E R S
SEPTEMBER SOLUTION
Doctor: “But that is gasoline!”
Engineer: “Congratulations! You’ve got your memory back.
That will be $500.”
The Doctor leaves angrily and comes back after several days,
more determined than ever to make his money back.
Doctor: “My eyesight has become weak.”
Engineer: “Well, I don’t have any medicine for this. Take this
$1,000,” passing the doctor a $500 note.
Doctor: “But this is $500!”
Engineer: “Congratulations! You’ve got your vision back!
That will be $500.”
Changing of the Light Bulbs
Source: engineerchic.me
Q: How many civil engineers does it take to change a light
bulb?
A: Two. One to do it and one to steady the chandelier.
Q: How many electrical engineers does it take to change a
light bulb?
A: None — simply redefine darkness as the industry standard.
Q: How many mechanical engineers does it take to change a
light bulb?
A: Five. One to decide which way the bulb ought to turn,
one to calculate the force required, one to design a tool with
which to turn the bulb, one to design a comfortable — but
functional — hand grip, and one to use all of this equipment.
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| Chief Engineer