Sound inside

Recommendations

Info

The Sound Inside 8/23/19 33I’m astounded by this fact.Two years.A week later I would collapse in my living room while reading James Salter.While recovering in the hospital I receive a card.She removes an envelope from her pocket, opens it, produces agreeting card.BELLA(to AUDIENCE)On the front of the card is a picture of Dostoyevsky well into his Midlife, thinand balding. His scraggily beard looks like a costume piece. His gaze, which isdirected away from the camera, is one of haunted reflection.She shows the AUDIENCE the face of the card, opens it.BELLA(to AUDIENCE)Inside, written with impressive penmanship, in black ink, it reads:PROFESSOR BAIRD,I heard you’ve been going through a difficult time. I hopeyou’re feeling better. You are missed in class.Your replacement is a graduate student who thinksDostoyevsky was writing Christian propaganda and that Raskolnikovis a latent homosexual. He clearly loves listening to the sound of hisown voice.I’d rather listen to yours.Come back soon. I miss our talks, too.Sincerely,CHRISTOPHER DUNN
The Sound Inside 8/23/19 34IVBELLA(to AUDIENCE)The consultation with my oncologist yields only the grimmest of prospects.The tumors are rampant.I ask him what my odds for recovery are. He says they are very low. I ask himfor a hard number. He says, “Twenty-to -twenty-five percent, probably closerto twenty.” I tell him that I feel fine. I tell him that I can’t smell any rotseeping out of me. I say, “Maybe I’m closer to twenty-five percent.” He says,“You’re not.” I tell him that my bowel movements are regular; that the pain inmy abdomen is practically negligible. I tell him how I recently had sex with aman; how everything in that department felt normal. He says, “Good.” I say,“Maybe that puts me at twenty-three percent.” He says, “It doesn’t,” andshows me my scans. He points to the healthy tissue, the unhealthy tissue.I say, “Oh.”“I’m being generous with twenty percent,” he says.He wants to start me on a cycle of aggressive treatment immediately.The following day, a male nurse leads me to a chemotherapy bay, whichboasts a dozen oyster-gray pleather recliners, which are separated by orangeshower curtains. There are three vacancies and I’m allowed to choose myvery own.I sit into it. It feels as if I’m accepting some sort of ergonomic, living-roomqualitydeath sentence.In a soothing voice the nurse asks me if someone is going to come by and pickme up after my treatment.“No,” I say. “I planned on walking home.”The nurse advises that in the future I should have someone come get me, thatthe medication can cause lightheadedness and that the nausea will very likelyget worse with each successive visit.I’m only half-hearing him. I’m too busy noticing all the other patients. Thecatheters attached to the backs of hands and forearms and collarbones andthe prophylactic arrangement of the various tubes, ports and fluid bags thatappear to
Page 1 and 2: The Sound Inside 10/16/19 1The Soun
Page 3 and 4: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 2IBELLA, a
Page 5 and 6: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 4A few day
Page 7 and 8: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 6Bella’s
Page 9 and 10: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 8(to CHRIS
Page 11 and 12: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 10BELLATha
Page 13 and 14: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 12I expect
Page 15 and 16: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 14BELLA(to
Page 17 and 18: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 16After a
Page 19 and 20: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 18CHRISTOP
Page 21 and 22: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 20BELLAAga
Page 33: The Sound Inside 9/24/19 32I let hi
Page 37 and 38: The Sound Inside 9/19/19 36I say,
Page 39 and 40: The Sound Inside 8/23/19 38A sound
Page 41 and 42: The Sound Inside 9/8/19 40BELLA(rea
Page 43 and 44: The Sound Inside 9/4/19 42BELLAOh.C
Page 49 and 50: The Sound Inside 9/17/19 48I rememb
Page 51 and 52: The Sound Inside 10/16/19 50In late

Sound inside

Create successful ePaper yourself

Delete template?

Save as template?