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her many relationships<br />
including her adult children,<br />
lifelong friends, and even<br />
being denied the ability to<br />
meet her granddaughter.<br />
Hill said, “To be honest there<br />
is no difference between<br />
a lesbian, a gay man or<br />
trans person that makes<br />
the decision to say.... this<br />
is my authentic self. Some<br />
have support. Some lose<br />
everything. My best advice<br />
is to try to surround yourself<br />
with good, positive and<br />
supportive people. The good<br />
news if you lose your family,<br />
the LGBTQ community is<br />
really great about stepping<br />
in and helping each other.<br />
Then you have your chosen<br />
family.”<br />
Sometimes the unknown<br />
can be the scariest part of<br />
finally living your authentic<br />
life. Getting proper<br />
information can combat<br />
a lot of this fear. “There is<br />
so much bad information<br />
out there. When a person<br />
starts to transition they<br />
usually start looking online<br />
for groups and information.<br />
It has been my experience<br />
that when a person has a<br />
bad encounter they will<br />
log on and share as much<br />
about it in graphic detail.<br />
When things go well, most<br />
people don’t say anything.<br />
So it sets us all up to be<br />
scared,” explained Hill.<br />
She went on to say,<br />
“Then there is our own<br />
head. We all are our own<br />
worst critics. Fear is a liar<br />
and has a way to steer us<br />
into solitude. Which makes<br />
things even worse.” Hill’s<br />
advice when one starts<br />
to have fear creep in is to<br />
reach out and ask for help.<br />
Building Community<br />
Hill has submerged<br />
herself into community<br />
activities. She is on the<br />
Equity Diversity Inclusion<br />
committee under the<br />
University Staff Advisory<br />
Council where she was<br />
elected to serve a twoyear<br />
term at Vanderbilt.<br />
She is also on the Women’s<br />
Committee at Vanderbilt<br />
University, volunteers at<br />
VUMC through the Trans<br />
Buddy Program, and helps<br />
run the trans support<br />
group at the Table with<br />
Dawn Bennett among<br />
other projects.<br />
While being involved in<br />
the community helps with<br />
building confidence, she<br />
said, “it just takes time to<br />
build up the courage to fully<br />
relax and be our true selves.<br />
My story is not unique to me<br />
nor to transgender people.<br />
Many have had similar<br />
struggles with friends and<br />
family when they came<br />
out. Many still pretend to<br />
be straight around family<br />
just to not be shunned.<br />
Sometimes people feel it’s<br />
better to fake it than to sit at<br />
home alone on the holidays.<br />
That hurts my heart thinking<br />
about how many out there<br />
are living a lie, just like I did<br />
for years.”<br />
Of all the things she<br />
has learned during her<br />
transition, Hill stated there<br />
are some things that are<br />
never discussed enough<br />
during transitioning.<br />
She said, “For me, I had<br />
absolutely no idea how<br />
much privilege I had as an<br />
acting cis-gender white<br />
straight male. No one talks<br />
about losing privilege. But<br />
it goes away fast. I’ve had<br />
more issues with just plain<br />
sexism and loss of privilege<br />
than I ever did with<br />
transphobia. I’m quite the<br />
feminist and believe the Me<br />
Too movement needs to<br />
expand and grow.”<br />
To watch Olivia’s<br />
interview with VUMC click<br />
here.<br />
www.CliftonandLeopold.com
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