Picasso at the Lapin Agile By Steve Martin

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GASTON: I know the feeling. EINSTEIN: What I just said is the fundamental, end-all, final, notsubject-to-opinion absolute truth, depending on where you are standing. FREDDY (notices PICASSO thinking, hushes everyone): Hey, Pablo, psst! Pabs...yo, Picasso!...Easel head! Hey, blue boy! What‘s with you? PICASSO: Sorry, I was just trying to not have an idea. EINSTEIN: You have a lot of ideas? PICASSO: Endless. GASTON: How do you draw something? It seems so impossible. PICASSO: What do you mean? GASTON: Well, you‘re a painter; you‘re always having to come up with ideas. What‘s it like? I mean, the only idea I ever came up with was when I had to paint my shutters. I had to figure out a color. And I thought about it for a long time. Should they be a light color or a dark color? For a while, forest blue seemed nice; then, I realized there was no such thing as forest blue. I tried to flip a coin but lost it on the roof. I started thinking, ―What are shutters anyway, and what would their natural color be?‖ Then I realized that shutters don‘t occur in nature, so they don‘t have a natural color. Suddenly, I knew I was just moments away from a decision, just moments, finally. Then this gorgeous thing walks by, with ruby lips and a derriere the shape of a valentine. I swiveled my head around and snapped a tendon. That put the decision off for three days. Then I thought, ―Maybe just take off the shutters‖; I started to think about moving to a land where there are no shutters and, frankly, suicide. But then one day, I said to myself, ―Green,‖ and that was it. (GASTON exits to the bathroom.) PICASSO: My process is just like that, but leave out the start, all the middle parts, and jump to the end. If I asked myself what color I wanted, it would just slow me down. FREDDY: I know what he means. (FREDDY splashes together a drink.) PICASSO: Well, I see other painters struggling wit it, killing themselves over it even. And I don‘t get their worry. I put the
pencil to the paper, and it comes out. Not the craft, mind you, that was difficult to get. The ideas are a different matter. The ideas swoop down on me, they fall like rain, they land with a crash. EINSTEIN: They ―thunk,‖ too. PICASSO: Absolutely! They thunk. EINSTEIN: You too? PICASSO: Yes. And pop. EINSTEIN: Well, pop all the time, that goes without saying. They never seem to flow though. PICASSO: Never. Flowing is a myth. EINSTEIN: Never flow. Well, sometimes. PICASSO: Yeah, sometimes. FREDDY: Where do they come from? PICASSO: Before me, artists used to get ideas from the past. But as of this moment, they are coming from the future, fast and loose. EINSTEIN: Absolutely from the future. PICASSO: I think in the moment of the pencil to paper, the future is mapped out in the face of the person drawn. Imagine that the pencil is pushed hard enough, and the lead goes through the paper into another dimension.( PICASSO and EINSTEIN start to get excited.) EINSTEIN: Yes! PICASSO: A kind of fourth dimension, if that‘s what you want to call it… EINSTEIN: I can‘t believe you‘re saying this! A fourth dimension! PICASSO: And that fourth dimension is...the future. EINSTEIN: Wrong. Einstein: they ―thunk‖, too. Picasso: Absolutely! They thunk. Einstein: You too?
Page 1 and 2: Picasso at the Lapin Agile By Steve
Page 3 and 4: Freddy: If you really want to meet
Page 5 and 6: (Freddy gives back the program) Ein
Page 7 and 8: (This pleases her. She takes an art
Page 9 and 10: which wine I drink, I‘d like to p
Page 11 and 12: for months, and I even like him, bu
Page 13 and 14: locks , ― here kitty , kitty , ki
Page 15 and 16: Freddy: ill work on it tomorrow Ein
Page 17 and 18: Germaine: well does it make you lau
Page 19 and 20: Freddy: two thousand two hundred fo
Page 21 and 22: Sagot: The boundaries. The edge. Ot
Page 23 and 24: Germaine (Indicating the painting o
Page 25 and 26: Picasso: are you an artist? Einstei
Page 27 and 28: Einstein: I work the same way I mak
Page 29 and 30: FREDDY: You calling me a good-for-n
Page 31 and 32: EINSTEIN: See? He‘s just getting
Page 33 and 34: Suzanne: I should go now. (she pick
Page 35: GASTON: Is not! EINSTEIN: Is too! G
Page 39 and 40: Einstein: Yes, and like you, the th
Page 41 and 42: Einstein: (the same) O Lapin Agile!
Page 43 and 44: you like them young because you can
Page 45 and 46: EINSTEIN (halts): What do you do? V
Page 47 and 48: EVERYBODY: (ad lib): Yeah, okay . .
Page 49 and 50: Picasso: Millions and millions of s
Page 51 and 52: Picasso: I want them to see the tho
Page 53: Visitor (eyes the lights): Isn‘t

Picasso at the Lapin Agile By Steve Martin

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