10 10 WOOLWICH OBSERVER • OPINION&LETTERS • JULY <strong>27</strong>, 20<strong>02</strong> THECROSSWORD LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS 25 % ALL SWISS HERBAL OFF PRODUCTS LIMITED TIME OFFER! Monday <strong>July</strong> 29th through August 2nd, 20<strong>02</strong> Spend a day at the beach By mid-<strong>July</strong> there is often a lull where farming operations are concerned, just after the first hay crop has been stacked in the mow or in long rows of white ‘tubes’ along the edge of the field. This time period is rather brief but if we plan carefully we may be able to do something for fun rather than out of necessity. The levels of both the farm pond and the goldfish pond have somehow decreased. I can easily fill the goldfish pond with the garden hose, but to do this in the farm pond would be about as useless as the fifth teat on a cow’s udder. So during the lull I decided to go to a real beach with real sand and waves, and no bullfrogs to bellow their bass voices as soon as they realized my intrusion. Armed with sunscreen, a large umbrella, sunglasses, towel, a cooler full of iced tea, a ‘beach’ chair and a good book, I packed these items in the back of my pickup and early in the morning, headed for Sauble Beach. When I arrived, I was the only human amongst thousands of squawking seagulls who were flying overhead or running in the waves, digging for food scraps. I selected my spot on the beach and waited for the sun to make its way up into the sky. You may have noticed that a farmer on the beach LETTER CONTINUED.... (CONTINUED FROM PAGE 8) memberships they can sell to back their choice for Prime Minister, they seemingly have no concern civil servants are justifying breaking every rule in the book, they accept without question MYSIDE OF THEDAM BY ALLEN D. MARTIN sticks out like a beached whale, although the colours differ. From working long hours in the sun, farmers tend to have an excellent tan on the back of the neck between the baseball cap line to the spot were the T-shirt begins. The other day when I went to town for a part for the baler, I met some tourists, each one with a camera around the necks. As they snapped pictures of me I heard one youngster ask,” Momma is that a ‘red-neck?” Perhaps it was a good thing that he didn’t notice my hands. When handling bales, I wear a pair of durable gloves with the fingers cut off so the twine won’t cut my palms. This results in tanned fingers on white hands. And since I don’t wear socks in the summertime, my tan goes from ankle to knee. Looking me over I decided I might as well have printed “FARMER” on my forehead with a marker. As people began to arrive in droves, I noticed many very good tans on the beach in contrast to my thighs and upper body which were stark white in comparison to my knees and forearms which were a dark bronze. In order to disguise myself a bit I decided to wear my baseball cap as I headed for the water. No one seemed to notice me as I headed for the water. Just as I reached it, a sudden wave struck me full in the face, whipping off my baseball cap, washing it out of sight. About an hour later, I felt cooled enough to return to my beach chair and sip some cold iced tea. The water had rinsed away most of my problems along with the dirt from under my fingernails. As I reached for my book, a slim lady with a perfectly tanned body came towards me. “Think I found your hat, sir,” she said, producing a soiled mass of straw. I noticed it was not mine as it didn’t have the International crest on it. Instead the words, “Farmers Do it in the Hay,” leaped out at me. I had been found out. From my side of the dam, I decided to spend my Sunday afternoons tanning the parts of my body that aren’t normally tanned on the farm, to save me some embarrassment the next time I go to Sauble. ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ the end justifies the means and pay no attention to editorials stating that until they “can prove that sponsorship money is well spent, the government’s internal housecleaning will look suspiciously like a case of the fox guarding the henhouse.” As Liberals their concentration on who will emerge as their leader is justified. As Members of Parliament charged with representing the interests of all Canadians, it is not. Joe Hueglin Niagara Falls LETTERS TO THE EDITOR ARE ALWAYS WELCOME. editor@woolwichobserver.com
JULY <strong>27</strong>, 20<strong>02</strong> • OBSERVERFEATURE • WOOLWICH OBSERVER 11 11
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