Because I am a Girl - Plan USA

Lorianny
and her
father in the
Dominican
Republic.
‘Real Choices, Real Lives’ –
The Plan cohort turns 5
P l a n
The ‘Real Choices, Real Lives’ study was
launched in 2007 to follow 142 girls from nine
countries around the world through their early
childhood journeys, from birth until their ninth
birthday. This year, many of the girls turn five,
a key milestone in childhood. Not all of them
have survived. Since the study began, five
girls have died and this year another little girl,
Mary Joy T from the Philippines, drowned.
Mary Joy’s family have no sanitation facilities,
so she was taken to use the nearby river by
an older cousin. Both children then started to
play and were drowned.
All the deaths in our study can be
attributed to poverty – to patchy access to
healthcare, lack of parental education, poor
housing or lack of sanitation facilities. The
study itself brings home to us the realities of
life for families in many parts of the world
and illuminates the decisions they face and
choices they make as their daughters grow
up – decisions and choices that many of
these families face with amazing courage and
resilience.
This year’s report focuses on the role of
men and boys and on engaging them in the
fight for gender equality. Our argument is that
gender equality benefits both sexes; but in
many institutions, including the family, men
may be reluctant to change as they fear a loss
of power and do not anticipate any gains.
This year when our researchers visited the
girls and their families they also spent time
with the girls’ fathers, conducting life history
interviews. These detailed interviews reveal
not only what has shaped the attitudes and
behaviour of these 86 fathers, but also look
closely at their roles and responsibilities. Our
researchers also examined how the men
define being a good father.
“When I am next to my children I feel like a
hero. I feel big when I am next to them.”
Estefani’s father, Dominican Republic
One key factor to emerge from the interviews
was that all but one of the men had been
hit by his parents and many – the men
from Vietnam, Togo and the Dominican
Republic being the exception – had witnessed
domestic abuse. Zaldy, father of Jessa
from the Philippines, feared his own father
throughout his childhood: “If I couldn’t go
to him immediately when he called me, I
got spanked. Or when I arrived late from
school, I got spanked… I cried as he hit me.
The following day, my body would ache.
My father was cruel when he was drunk.
Whenever I remember how he hit me then,
my tears fall.” He also witnessed domestic
abuse of his mother. It is a pattern he is
determined not to repeat. He wants the best
for his five children: “They each have their
own dreams. I tell my kids if they want to
have a good job, they should study well.”
It is also clear from the interviews that the
gender divisions of labour the men observed
in their childhood homes heavily influence
how their own households are now managed.
In fact, many of the men interviewed were
uncritical as they remembered how household
tasks were allocated while they were growing
up. Lorianny’s father remembers, “I didn’t
help with chores – I was allowed to be idle
here [at home], ha ha. Only in the yard,
I did a few things. My sister helped my
mum. My brother and I helped my dad.” In
the Philippines, Riza’s father had a similar
experience: “I had to sweep the house many
times. I did not like doing that, because I
thought it was my sister’s job. It was my elder
sister who forced me to do that when Mother
was absent.” In Benin, however, Marcelle’s
father was brought up by his own father after
his parents’ divorce. As a result, he watched
his father do household tasks throughout his
childhood. For him, it was normal: “My father
used to cook frequently because my mother
left. He could take care of us very well.”
It is clear from these comments that since
28 the s tate of the world’s girls 29