13.06.2015 Views

Fish Fingers and Custard Issue 1 - Fish Fingers and Custard Fanzine

Fish Fingers and Custard Issue 1 - Fish Fingers and Custard Fanzine

Fish Fingers and Custard Issue 1 - Fish Fingers and Custard Fanzine

SHOW MORE
SHOW LESS

You also want an ePaper? Increase the reach of your titles

YUMPU automatically turns print PDFs into web optimized ePapers that Google loves.

7<br />

<strong>Fish</strong> <strong>Fingers</strong> <strong>and</strong> <strong>Custard</strong> <strong>Issue</strong> 1<br />

A BUNCH OF (DOCTOR WHO) FIVES<br />

5 Things I Expect Matt Smith To Own<br />

• At least one (full) football sticker album<br />

• (Pirated) Classic Series’ DVD’s<br />

• At least one item of one of Karen Gillan’s<br />

costumes<br />

• (Broken) Doctor Who toys<br />

• A vast collection of hats<br />

5 Things I Suspect Steven Moffat Does<br />

Whilst Writing<br />

• Writes ideas on his h<strong>and</strong>s before typing it<br />

out<br />

• Makes sure there is as much noise as<br />

possible before he starts<br />

• Drinks Irn Bru<br />

• Curses under his breath as the dreaded<br />

Microsoft Paperclip pops up<br />

• Recycles lines from his previous works<br />

5 Things I Want To See From Karen<br />

Gillan<br />

• More great facial expressions<br />

• More wearing of tights<br />

• Continued usage of the phrase ‘ma boys’<br />

• A dress littered with ?’s, ala the JNT era<br />

• Her phone number<br />

5 Actors Who Should Guest Star In<br />

Doctor Who<br />

• David Jason<br />

• Rik Mayall<br />

• Sean Pertwee<br />

• Graham Norton<br />

• Harry Sedgewick<br />

5 Things That Tom Baker will do before<br />

agreeing to do Big Finish stories<br />

• Go h<strong>and</strong> gilding<br />

• Be Engl<strong>and</strong>’s captain for the World Cup<br />

<strong>and</strong> replace John Terry at centre-half<br />

• Go to a convention <strong>and</strong> dress up as Tegan<br />

• L<strong>and</strong> on the moon<br />

• Guest star in the new series of Doctor Who,<br />

as The Master<br />

5 Big Finish characters who are better<br />

than their television series counterparts<br />

• Evelyn Smythe (played by Maggie Stables)<br />

• Charlotte ‘Charley’ Pollard (India <strong>Fish</strong>er)<br />

• Lucie Miller (Sheridan Smith)<br />

• Thomas Hector ‘Hex’ Schofield (Philip<br />

Oliver)<br />

• Bernice ‘Benny’ Summerfield (Lisa<br />

Bowerman)<br />

5 Doctor Who Stories That Would Make<br />

Good Adult Movie Titles<br />

• The Pleasure Hive<br />

• Planet of the Ooh<br />

• Galaxy 4-Some<br />

• Under-ware World<br />

• The Girl in My-place<br />

5 Doctor Who ‘Agendas’, Made Up By<br />

Fans<br />

• The ‘Gay Agenda’<br />

• The ‘Scottish Agenda’<br />

• The ‘London Agenda’<br />

• The ‘Earth’ Agenda<br />

• The ‘Poking Fun At Fans’ Agenda<br />

5 Pointless Castings In Doctor Who<br />

• Hale <strong>and</strong> Pace<br />

• Gerald Flood<br />

• McFly<br />

• Barbara Windsor<br />

• Mike Skinner<br />

5 Things That Would Happen If Doctor<br />

Who or Torchwood Was Ever Broadcast<br />

on FOX in the US<br />

• It’ll be subtitled<br />

• Each episode would be 3 hours long,<br />

thanks to advert breaks<br />

• The name of the program will always be<br />

shown as ‘Doc. Who’, whilst Torchwood<br />

will be ‘Torchwood:UK’<br />

• Any gay/sexual references will be cut out.<br />

• John Barrowman will be cut out

Hooray! Your file is uploaded and ready to be published.

Saved successfully!

Ooh no, something went wrong!