Three Days of Happiness

life. I’ll make it 300,000 yen that’s worth more than 3 billion! I’m
gonna work to get back at this world!”
In my intoxicated mind, I thought it sounded pretty cool.
But Miyagi was apathetic. “That is what everyone says.”
Putting her pen aside, she grabbed her knees and rested her chin
between them.
“I’ve heard at least five statements to that effect in my time.
Everyone speaks of extremes when death is nearing. Particularly
those who can’t say they’ve had a fulfilling life thus far. Under the
same logic by which losing gamblers continue to hope for an
increasingly unrealistic turnaround, those who keep losing in life
come to hope for unrealistic happiness. Many feel reinvigorated
when the closeness of death reminds them of the sparkle of life,
and they come to believe that they can do this or that - but those
people are making a crucial mistake. They have only just arrived at
the starting line. They have only just regained their composure after
a long losing streak. Mistaking that as a chance to turn things
around will do them no good.
“...So please, Mr. Kusunoki. Think of it this way. The reason your
remaining thirty years were so lacking in value was because in
them, you accomplished not one single thing. You understand that,
yes?”, Miyagi bluntly reminded me. “What can a man who would
accomplish nothing in thirty years change in a mere three months?”
“...Won’t know ‘til we try,” I argued, but even I hated how hollowly
my words rang.
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