feb 2015

MOM’S PERSPECTIVE
FACEBOOK
Follies
By Cheryl Pangborn
I’ve written about Facebook before, but it truly never ceases to amaze
me. It has evolved so that sometimes I’m fooled into thinking it’s a
living, breathing entity. There was a big brouhaha when they were
bullying us into using the messenger app to retrieve private FB messages.
Suddenly, we were terrified by the notion that FB would be
spying on us, utilizing our camera, hearing our private conversations
- taking over the world! In my world, even without the messenger
app, FB is suggesting friends to me that I may have called on my
phone or met one time, and it’s pretty creepy. People are worried
about an app giving them more access? I think that ship has sailed.
Lately my news feed is annoyingly jammed up with quizzes.
I actually saw one that said, “What color is your soul?” Come
on! I don’t even know what that means. My soul must be green
with envy of people who have time to spend on this nonsense.
What about the quiz “How addicted to Facebook are you?”
If you’re taking this quiz, you clearly need an intervention.
I have to wonder if some of the ways we document our lives aren’t
specifically social media driven. We’ve developed all these creative
ways to announce engagements, births and, of course, what we are
about to eat for breakfast. After all, when you took pictures ten
years ago, not many people saw them unless you carried a giant
photo album everywhere. Now someone can store pictures right
on their smart phone and bore the pants off us at a moment’s
notice, with a running montage of their lives over dinner.
I am amazed at the photo shoots people do now, for instance, to
document a pregnancy. Personally I had no desire to have a picture
portfolio of my last trimester, mostly because I was the size of a bus.
Plus, back then it really wasn’t worth it; after all, who would see it?
Now everyone is privy to tons of images of the bus - I mean baby
mama. Would we bother with this if that wasn’t so? Was everyone
doing this except for me? Hmmm ... some deep social pondering here.
I actually saw one that said, “What color is
your soul?” Come on! I don’t even know what
that means.
I am also fascinated by the pictures people take that seem so
candid, yet I can’t believe they weren’t carefully orchestrated. I’m
not talking about the serious selfie, that, in my opinion, looks
ridiculous because nobody takes an unexpected shot of himself.
I am talking about the girl looking out over a cliff into the ocean,
hair flowing in the wind, with just a glimpse of her from behind.
Who did you get to take that picture? Obviously, unless you have
five-hundred-foot arms that are super stretchy, you didn’t do it. If I
asked my husband to take a picture of me like that, he would laugh
at me. Did someone just grab your phone while you were gazing at
nature and take this perfect shot?
I have this little thing about “liking” things on Facebook. I really
don’t like too many things, and by that I mean press the “Like”
button. However, I have friends who like everything. Call me
weird, but I have this guilty thing going on where I feel like, perhaps
if I am liked by a particular friend a lot, I should match them
like for like? Yes, I am totally overthinking this. And, what about
birthdays and anniversaries? Lately, if I don’t comment ‘Happy
Birthday’ on a friend’s page, but maybe send them a card or a text,
I feel like I’m not getting the birthday credit if it’s not public on
Facebook. Facebook etiquette is not an easily accomplished task.
So lesson learned here: vanity thy name is Facebook. All of us
Facebook users are guilty of the vain pleasure it offers. We tag
ourselves all over town, post statuses that no one really needs to
know, take selfies, and stalk others; it’s all a part of the fun that is
Facebook. I can say in all honesty, I am addicted. But I rest in the
fact that I am not the only one! P
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FEBRUARY 2015