Fertility Road Issue 03

FEATURE | worldwide web of fertility
In real life, these women reveal themselves
to be lawyers, doctors, army wives, teachers,
engineers, policewomen and stay at home
mothers, living in America, England, Europe,
Africa, the Middle East - all of them sharing
an insatiable hunger for knowledge about
their own reproductive abilities and pregnancy
chances. It’s a fascinating all-female world, and
close friendships often arise.
And frequently, the advice on fertility sites
goes much further than that given by scientists.
Take the legendary site peeonastick.com. A
‘comprehensive collection of home pregnancy
test and ovulation predictor test information
and images’, this die-hard site catalogues the
sensitivity of tests (officially versus anecdotally),
has a wealth of unbelievably detailed information
on how tests work scientifically, which goes far
beyond what manufacturers think women need
to know, and even publishes random experiments
the author has done, for example, using breast
milk instead of urine on a pregnancy test.
It’s surely the best of times for any woman
wanting to know more about fertility, but could
there also be a risk of information overload and
each other’s success stories. It has the
advantage of being anonymous, and means
you can be completely honest about what
you’re going through, without sharing too
much with real life friends.”
Justine Roberts, co-founder of mumsnet.
com, agrees. “Our TTC (trying to conceive)
discussion boards are one of the busiest
parts of Mumsnet. Out there in the real
world, it can be hard to find people who are in the same situation
as you but, each month on Mumsnet, a new load of people
aiming for a BFP (big fat positive) join a discussion thread
together and find somewhere safe and supportive to vent
their frustrations, sharing at the same time information about
what’s worked for them during the ups and downs of trying to
have a baby.”
On fertility site message boards, women have posted signatures
which express their desperation to conceive, perhaps even at a
certain time and a certain gender (‘swaying for blue in September
2011’) or their memories of babies lost in miscarriage (‘Jay: 10
weeks in my womb; forever in my heart’). They have cartoon
‘tickers’ which show other posters where they are in their cycle:
the 30 days might be illustrated by a long, winding road, and the
point they are at by an egg hatching, or a cradle.
It’s a strange new world, light years away from the whispered
conversations women had only a generation ago when, without
the internet, infertility was something discussed discretely with
your doctor and closest friends, and there were only a few books
to guide you. On fertilityfriend.com, each woman’s cycle graphs
are added to a vast ‘chart gallery’ where women can ‘overlay’
their own chart with others’, or search for others who have
similar charts to them (right down to intercourse pattern and pre
and post ovulatory temperatures) and got pregnant.
It’s surely the best of times for any
woman wanting to know more about
fertility, but could there also be a risk of
information overload and old wives’ tales?
old wives’ tales? Online posters hotly debate the possible fertility
benefits of everything from drinking grapefruit juice to increase
cervical mucus, to using an ‘instead cup’ to hold semen close to
the cervix. But who can you trust? There’s very little advice
available online from appropriately qualified doctors, and even
when you do take the trouble to sift through all the sites written
by amateurs to find those written by medical professionals, the
information you find often conflicts with that from another site.
Too much ‘fertility surfing’ can also lead to an unhelpful level
of preoccupation that takes over hours of the day, every day.
Surrounded by online friends who are equally obsessed, it’s easy
to lose your sense of perspective to a point where if someone
asks you what day it is, your first thought is ‘seven dpo [days post
ovulation]’.
Jane’s story (not her real name) illustrates both sides of the
coin. She and her partner were trying artificial insemination at
home. “It didn’t cross my mind at first to ask my GP how to do it,”
she says – “I was too embarrassed!”
It was much easier to search for information online - she found
some encouraging success stories and bought a kit containing
some syringes, sample pots and instructions. It was only after three
months of unsuccessfully following the instructions that Jane
found the courage to ask her GP if this could really work - and
he explained that the instructions in the kit were incorrect. »
© Yuri Arcurs / iStockphoto.com
44 fertility road | november - december