SKW ENG V09

LIFESTYLE
For some of us, it can be quite a challenge
to discipline a child. It can even be
heartbreaking, for as parents, we want
to see a smile on our child’s face, not a
sad frown, tears, or the dreaded tantrum.
Having said that, there are many ways to
appropriately correct a child.
For a better outcome on the long run,
here are some effective tips that we hope
will help.
When saying ‘no’,
once is enough
Let’s face it — You’ll be using the word
‘no’ often enough, so why not make
it count? The trick here, for each new
incident, is to be firm in delivering the first
‘no’, so there is no need to reiterate. Be
serious with your words and expression
when communicating the reasons why
your child is not getting his or her way.
(See Explain). If the first “no” does not
work, try a different approach, such as
finding ways to say ‘yes’, but still mean
‘no’. (See Saying ‘yes’ but meaning ‘no’)
Remember, resist relenting at this point,
for that gives way for incessant and tiring
manipulations in the future, things kids are
naturally bound to try.
Explain
Mere saying ‘no’ to a child holds no true
meaning when it comes to correcting or
communicating with a child. Unless you
supply an explanation, a child is very likely
to repeat the behaviour, say, like asking
for ice-cream just before dinner. The
better, more effective way is to explain
that ice-cream before dinner will spoil their
appetite for the yummy food that is going
to make them strong and healthy, just like
their favourite movie character, sports
idol, etc.
Saying ‘yes’ but
meaning ‘no’
Children who hear ‘no’ too many times
from their parents are at risk of becoming
‘immune’ to it, making it challenging for
parents to say ‘no’ as they grow older,
for the word will in time, hold little or
no meaning. It may also give way to
unnecessary resentment. Try the tactic of
saying ‘yes’ but meaning ‘no’ instead. As
sneaky as it sounds, it’s totally doable. For
example, if your child asks for a favourite
cookie, you can reply: “Yes, you can have
a one right after dinner.” If they ask for
something while you’re out shopping, you
can say: “Yes, of course. Is that what you
want for Christmas/your birthday/a backto-school
present? These are normally
win-win compromises that soften the blow
of a ‘no’.
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SmartKids World Vol. 09