Lot's Wife - MSA Women’s & POC Edition Five

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Lot’s Wife • Edition Five 26 Art by Kajal K
Lot’s Wife • Edition Five Gag Orders A Survivor’s Perspective Words by Natalia Zivcic Cw. sexual assault I was seventeen years old when I was raped. I didn’t even understand what rape or consent was. I thought rape only happened in dark alleyways with strange men. I didn’t know that rape could come from someone that I knew, someone that I trusted. I believed my rapist when he said that no one would believe me. I thought it was my fault. After all, I was drunk and dressed provocatively. I never reported my rape to the police. I was scared that no one would believe me. It took me seven years of slowly opening up to friends and family to really process what happened to me. I lost years of my life being scared, helpless, and voiceless. Only now, at twenty-four years old, can I look back at what happened to me with total clarity. On February 7, changes were made to the Judicial Proceedings Reports Act (Victoria). It is now an offence for sexual assault survivors to identify themselves and share their story publicly. This applies to abusers who have been convicted or where charges have been pressed. The premise of these prohibitions is to protect survivors who do not wish to have their identity disclosed by media reports. However, the unwelcome side effect is that these laws have gagged survivors from coming forward and sharing their own story. If survivors do want to share their story, they have to obtain a court order; an expensive and time-consuming process. Sexual assault offences are underreported and rarely result in a conviction, with only 34 per cent of recorded sexual assault cases resulting in any police progression at all (Crime Statistics Agency, February 2017). If survivors don’t have the opportunity to share their story, these statistics will get worse with time. Without hearing others stories, survivors will be even further discouraged from coming forward. Unfortunately, the general consensus is that reporting rape is a traumatising and fruitless activity. If I had known that reporting the assault would be met with respect and understanding instead of judgement and blame, I would have handled things differently. Reading the stories of other survivors helped me process my trauma. I followed women on social media with stories like mine. They inspired me. They gave me strength. I learnt that I wasn’t alone and it wasn’t something to be ashamed of. I learnt that it wasn’t my fault. Without the opportunity to read other women’s stories, I would never have had the courage to tell my family and friends. Sharing my story with my loved ones facilitated my healing and my growth, without which I would still be a scared and sad little girl. We need survivors to be loud. The louder we are, the more we can encourage other survivors to report their abuse. Sharing your story is hard enough: I am testament to that. But adding an additional hurdle through this legislation will make it near impossible for people to come forward. We will be forced to decide between paying an exorbitant fee or remaining silent about our story. As someone who, after years of silence, has only now found her voice, these gag orders represent the years I lost. It’s disappointing that legislation which was intended to protect survivors has instead stabbed us in the back. If a survivor wishes to tell their story - that should be their choice. If they don’t - that should also be their choice. The legislation is a misguided attempt to honour this choice, and does not do justice to the rights survivors should have. I think, ultimately, the failure of this legislation is a result of obstinate decision making with a disappointing lack of input from survivors. In trying to ‘protect’ survivors from having their identity disclosed, the stigma surrounding rape will be perpetuated. After my rape I felt powerless, weak and vulnerable. I felt like I had no control over my life, and I was a shadow of a person. I used to feel ashamed. There is power in being vocal. It is healing. Speaking out publicly about this issue has facilitated my growth in a way that I didn’t know was possible. I never spoke out or pressed charges against my rapist. It turns out that I’m lucky that I didn’t. If I had? I wouldn’t have been able to tell my story today. 27
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Lot's Wife - MSA Women’s & POC Edition Five

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