13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do_ Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success ( PDFDrive )

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that she had to follow these rules if she wanted to come into their home.IDENTIFY PEOPLE WHO HAVE TAKEN YOUR POWERSteven McDonald is an incredible example of someone who chose not to giveaway his power. While working as a New York City police officer in 1986,Officer McDonald stopped to question some teenagers about some recent bicyclethefts. One of the fifteen-year-olds in question took out a gun and shot OfficerMcDonald in the head and neck. The shots paralyzed him from the neck down.Miraculously, Officer McDonald survived. He spent eighteen months in thehospital recuperating and learning how to live as a quadriplegic. At the time ofthe accident, he’d only been married eight months, and his wife was six monthspregnant.Remarkably, Officer McDonald and his wife chose not to focus on all that hadbeen taken away from them by this teenage boy. Instead, they made a consciouschoice to forgive him. In fact, a few years after his injury, the officer’s assailantcalled him from jail to apologize. Officer McDonald not only accepted hisapology, but he also told him that he hoped someday they could travel thecountry together sharing their story with the hope they could prevent other actsof violence. Officer McDonald never got the chance to do that, however, becausethree days after his assailant was released from prison, the young man was killedin a motorcycle accident.So Officer McDonald set out on his mission to spread his message aboutpeace and forgiveness on his own. “The only thing worse than a bullet in myspine would have been to nurture revenge in my heart,” he says in the book WhyForgive? He may have lost his physical mobility in that attack, but he didn’t givethat violent incident or his assailant the power to ruin his life. He’s now a highlysought after speaker who teaches love, respect, and forgiveness. OfficerMcDonald is an inspirational example of someone who, despite being the victimof a senseless act of violence, chose not to waste time giving his assailant morepower.Choosing to forgive someone who has hurt you, either emotionally orphysically, doesn’t mean you have to excuse the other person’s behavior, butletting go of your anger frees you to focus your energy on a more worthwhile
cause.If you’ve spent most of your life feeling like a victim of your circumstances, ittakes hard work to recognize that you have the power to choose your own pathin life. The first step is to develop self-awareness by identifying when you blameexternal circumstances and other people for how you think, feel, and behave.Take a close look at the people you are devoting your time and energy toward.Are they the people you want to receive it? If not, you may be giving them morepower than you think they deserve.Each second you spend commiserating with coworkers about how unfair yourboss is, you are giving your boss more power. Every time you tell your friendshow controlling your mother-in-law is, you give her a little more power overyou. Resolve to stop giving people your time and energy if you don’t want themto play a big role in your life.REFRAME YOUR LANGUAGESometimes retaining your power means changing the way you look at thesituation. Examples of language that indicates you’re giving away your powerinclude:• “My boss makes me so mad.” You may not like your boss’s behavior, butdoes he really make you feel angry? Perhaps your boss behaves in a mannerthat you don’t like and it may influence how you feel, but he’s not forcingyou to feel anything.• “My boyfriend left me because I’m not good enough.” Are you really notgood enough or is that just one person’s opinion? If you took a poll of ahundred people, it’s not likely that they’d all come to that same consensus.Just because one person thinks something, it doesn’t make it true. Don’t giveone person’s opinion of you the power to determine who you are.• “My mom makes me feel really bad about myself because she’s always socritical of me.” As an adult, are you obligated to listen to your mother makecritical statements about you over and over? Just because she makescomments you don’t like, does it really have to lower your self-esteem?
Page 5 and 6: DEDICATIONTo all who strive to beco
Page 7 and 8: THEY DON’T GIVE UP AFTER THE FIRS
Page 9 and 10: like to go back to the place where
Page 11 and 12: motorcycle. I also began writing. A
Page 13 and 14: out tips on how they should act and
Page 15 and 16: with his coworkers, the less they i
Page 17 and 18: need help from anyone or any type o
Page 19 and 20: CHAPTER 1THEY DON’T WASTE TIME FE
Page 21 and 22: encouraged his parents to stop feel
Page 23 and 24: provide a reason to avoid responsib
Page 25 and 26: sitting around in a circle sharing
Page 27 and 28: reaction was all about their differ
Page 29 and 30: her love for running. Over the year
Page 31 and 32: Jeremiah Denton served as a U.S. na
Page 33 and 34: sorry for yourself, even when you d
Page 35 and 36: Lauren about her “new age parenti
Page 37 and 38: You spend a lot of time complaining
Page 39: • You avoid addressing the real p
Page 43 and 44: someone when you’re feeling overl
Page 45 and 46: consequences. Perhaps you won’t g
Page 47 and 48: associated with increased pain tole
Page 49 and 50: CHAPTER 3THEY DON’T SHY AWAY FROM
Page 51 and 52: the basement to get them and most o
Page 53 and 54: irrevocably changed.• Habit chang
Page 55 and 56: to apply for new jobs. He worried t
Page 57 and 58: something different. But if you are
Page 59 and 60: She went to speech therapy eight ti
Page 61 and 62: • This will never work.• I can
Page 63 and 64: EMBRACING CHANGE WILL MAKE YOUSTRON
Page 65 and 66: Putting off doing anything differen
Page 67 and 68: on the most lavish vacations. James
Page 69 and 70: You think people who don’t reach
Page 71 and 72: you achieve success when you try ha
Page 73 and 74: Those who strike the right balance
Page 75 and 76: what she does have control over—l
Page 77 and 78: • Point out the positive. If some
Page 79 and 80: five-hour telethon raised $10.5 mil
Page 81 and 82: Not relying on yourself for the ent
Page 83 and 84: were stuck at work.Megan also frequ
Page 85 and 86: Do any of those examples sound fami
Page 87 and 88: generous. But when you think about
Page 89 and 90: people feel bad. Someone may not ge
Page 91 and 92:
she wakes her son up for school, he
Page 93 and 94:
they want because they’re so used
Page 95 and 96:
Mose temporarily left his Amish com
Page 97 and 98:
Identifying your values and behavin
Page 99 and 100:
of his life, he’d wanted to open
Page 101 and 102:
You avoid risks in at least some ar
Page 103 and 104:
our emotions are just not rational.
Page 105 and 106:
when we’re not in any actual dang
Page 107 and 108:
Most of the research shows that we
Page 109 and 110:
So I spent some time thinking about
Page 111 and 112:
Prior to his death in 2007, Psychol
Page 113 and 114:
Recognizing irrational thoughts tha
Page 115 and 116:
admitted she hadn’t been a very g
Page 117 and 118:
You invest a lot of time in thinkin
Page 119 and 120:
DWELLING ON THE PAST DISTRACTS YOU
Page 121 and 122:
about negative events increases inf
Page 123 and 124:
although she may have made some mis
Page 125 and 126:
• Practice forgiveness. Whether y
Page 127 and 128:
Moving forward in your life, even w
Page 129 and 130:
successful person, so it surprised
Page 131 and 132:
Despite her frustration, Kristy had
Page 133 and 134:
forty pounds last year but then slo
Page 135 and 136:
ventured outdoors to follow the ban
Page 137 and 138:
your mistakes:1. Establish behavior
Page 139 and 140:
get rich in the booming silver mini
Page 141 and 142:
WHAT’S NOT HELPFULMaking excuses
Page 143 and 144:
appearance of financial abundance h
Page 145 and 146:
are.You secretly experience joy whe
Page 147 and 148:
A 2013 study titled “Their Pain,
Page 149 and 150:
I had been working with a man in my
Page 151 and 152:
• Don’t insult other people’s
Page 153 and 154:
working. But he lost sight of his v
Page 155 and 156:
Although many people may have been
Page 157 and 158:
CHAPTER 10THEY DON’T GIVE UP AFTE
Page 159 and 160:
While some people are motivated by
Page 161 and 162:
types of thoughts kept her from ach
Page 163 and 164:
to cultivate the skills necessary t
Page 165 and 166:
• I can handle failure.• I can
Page 167 and 168:
middle of the Great Depression, Wal
Page 169 and 170:
Sometimes people are comfortable wi
Page 171 and 172:
CHAPTER 11THEY DON’T FEAR ALONE T
Page 173 and 174:
downright scary. Do any of the poin
Page 175 and 176:
And then, of course, some individua
Page 177 and 178:
full-time because she’d felt bad
Page 179 and 180:
Evaluate whether you’re taking go
Page 181 and 182:
months of meditation.Meditation has
Page 183 and 184:
been linked to improved physical he
Page 185 and 186:
he initially felt that meditation w
Page 187 and 188:
CHAPTER 12THEY DON’T FEEL THE WOR
Page 189 and 190:
demands.Lucas agreed to take his ne
Page 191 and 192:
superiority. Sometimes it is about
Page 193 and 194:
We see it all the time in the media
Page 195 and 196:
how unfair it was that she got canc
Page 197 and 198:
can ensure you don’t develop an i
Page 199 and 200:
Recognizing areas of your life wher
Page 201 and 202:
effort, therapy wouldn’t do any g
Page 203 and 204:
potential.WHY WE EXPECT IMMEDIATE R
Page 205 and 206:
THE PROBLEM WITH EXPECTINGIMMEDIATE
Page 207 and 208:
expectations may influence your beh
Page 209 and 210:
weren’t an effective way to get w
Page 211 and 212:
immediate results:• Keep your eye
Page 213 and 214:
greater financial security as adult
Page 215 and 216:
CONCLUSIONMAINTAININGMENTAL STRENGT
Page 217 and 218:
provide you with the type of suppor
Page 219 and 220:
REFERENCES
Page 221 and 222:
CHAPTER 2Arnold, Johann Christoph.
Page 223 and 224:
CHAPTER 4April, K., B. Dharani, and
Page 225 and 226:
CHAPTER 6“Albert Ellis and Ration
Page 227 and 228:
CHAPTER 8Ariely, D., and K. Wertenb
Page 229 and 230:
CHAPTER 10Barrier, Michael. The Ani
Page 231 and 232:
CHAPTER 12Cross, P. “Not Can but
Page 233 and 234:
Vardi, Nathan. “Rudy Ruettiger: I
Page 235 and 236:
COPYRIGHTThis book contains advice
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13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do_ Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success ( PDFDrive )