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Lessons learned by a ‘Mother of Boys’
As a mother who was used to pulling up stripey tights, foraging for hours in the accessories
bins for all things pink, glittery or fluffy, and trying to re-coif Sindy's hair after a
few minor 'I'm giving her a bob' disasters, it is at once alien but also fascinating to hear
the other side of the coin. Carol Farley picks a few extracts which might hit home to
those band of women who are The MOB (Mothers of Boys), written by a lone Queen
in a Kingdom of Kings - Hannah Evans.
You know you’ve joined the MOB
when you hear . . .
• ‘My, are they all yours?’
• ‘How fantastic . . . halfway to a football team!’
(Generally from a man)
• ‘Cheer up, it took me four tries to get my girl.’
(Mostly from a woman)
• ‘Bless you!’ (Occasionally)
• ‘Poor you!’ (Frequently)
• ‘Lucky you!’ (Once)
• ‘How do you cope?’
• ‘You’ve got your hands full!’
• And of course, the ultimate: ‘So . . . are you going
for a girl?’
So, How Does She Do It?
Top ten tips for surviving on Planet MOB
• Never buy the same colour socks in different
sizes. Alternate.
• Surround yourself with MOBs even madder than
you.
• Borrow a dog and go to puppy-training classes.
Implement their top tips on your offspring just as
soon as you get home.
• Never leave any job half done. If you do,
someone will undo what you did do, before you
come back to finish it off.
• Bake.
• Always have a ready supply of wet wipes in your
bag. Long after they appear to be of little or no
use.
• Beat ’em at their own game: learn to burp the
alphabet backwards.
• Invest in some really good ever-clean jeans. Oh,
and a pair of wellies.
• Stockpile cereal.
• Know just enough about dinosaurs to convince
them you care.
28 x R&A HASLEMERE & VILLAGES February 2013