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\\'riting rcfercnce (Paper 2)
Essay
Task
You have had a class discussion on what people do in
their free time. Your teacher has now asked you to
write an essay, giving your opinions on the following
statement:
Shopping has little value as a leisure activity.
Write your essay.
Sample answers
A
De.s shopping have. /itt/e. vqtue. 4s q te.isvFe. aclivifi
1 +hir:,R nesl- p.op/e, ar^e. re.a//y Reeh oh sh-,pFing
&t+ is it re.a/r\1 v*.fv/
For exqr^ple., if twe atsR s+vlen+s wAaf i'ley'ne goiag
lo lo in a 6ig c-ifi, |he aswe.rs +re. alatos+ ahways
'shoppingt, 4n/ fley /on'i +hinR a&otrf going to
upsev.^s anl sght-see.ittg. /i,osi- |ovrisls go shopf;rtg
so.aeti.^e insleal of lo ee. lle fdtdts plqees a4/
so *Aey loh'i le.qr4 a$ov+ ptaee.s tley visil.
I'loweven,
Fople who e-t1ioy shoppittg /iRe eve.ry st4ge.
a6ov| sh.,pfing, froa winlow do2piet l.ryitp
c-lo/hzs oh, +hihRitlg if |hey s,/lc,t/H by or t1o+, to
6"yiry. 11e. finat st49e. is to k sqtisfie.l wil.h eeiag
whai they have bughl in the;. hovse or wearing it
ih fron+ of t)*.in ainor like a fasAion sAow.
1\is aelivity is pnove.l io 6e d eoaplele. leigtre.
aetivill. Ia/ee/, 7 neql 4h qFtiele. in a newspafr-.n
c-a//e/ t Shopping is a .w1y +o ne.lqx'. Y{e shon/l 4// vse
this niee Fe./qxalioh 4h/ ,p+ fee./ gvilty. Dohtt yov
thihR so
B
I believe thaf shopping can be one of ttre
importanf fhings people do, liLe eatng and
sleeping, and for .sorne shopping is t#tc chance
fo do their favourH
meefing friends. re fhings like dalking and
On the one hand, I think- that i.5 true thaf
shopping ha.s no value in sare lifestSles. peoVle
think of skopping ontg as a chance 1o ao
y:y
rhe3 Dant, and rten ir is an e3cdpe
from doing fhings the3 should do. f mean
people go shopping instead of do aocV_.
Hotrever, o-the(3 think_ of if a.5 a chance to
[.n: i"#;:r _.Llpff: l-" *^"
d':cuss eve(3 da,3 problems - for example, if
3ou have gof some problems, in that shopping
time 3ou mighf listen +o oll_te(s problems and
fhinL that uJoo(3 a:ce nothing compa.ed to
lleics. ff can make
aocv- vcessore and ="" i::"[il ";:rX
oklo krave a hard 1ob and lifesnlle.
In conclusion, it's tcur
*ft. varue, u,r p"op"'#l*llhi.'.ln t*
means that sknpping (,ill be priceless fo( some.
mffi;
Comments
These answers are both Band 4, for different reasons.
A This has clear organisation. with paragraphs giving B This answers the question clearly and uses a wide
points for and against the statement. However, the
range of vocabulary and some good expressions (e.g.
first sentence just repeats the task. There are some think that yours are nothing compared to theirs).
good expressions (e.9. if we ask ... the answers are However, there are grammatical mistakes (e.g.
almost always'shopping') but also some grammatical instead of do work). The style is appropriate. The
mistakes (e.g.go shopping sometime instead of to conclusion clearly returns to the question and gives a
see). There is quite a good range of topic-related nice summary of the writer's opinion. lt has a positive
vocabulary, but the style is too informal in places (e.g. effect on the reader.
Don't you think so).lt has a posrtive effect on the
reader.