February - Wingspan
February - Wingspan
February - Wingspan
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<strong>February</strong> 14, 2011<br />
wingspan.lccc.wy.edu<br />
I took my headphones<br />
off so I could<br />
hear the dog as it<br />
circled me.<br />
Inclement-looking<br />
clouds were forming<br />
in the mid-June sky,<br />
which was what had<br />
compelled me to take<br />
a shortcut back to my<br />
apartment.<br />
I live in proximity<br />
to various businesses<br />
and services,<br />
so I often walk to my<br />
destinations. That is<br />
how I found myself in<br />
this predicament.<br />
Dogs have always<br />
been one of my greatest<br />
fears. I was once<br />
mauled as a child, and<br />
I think the event left<br />
a particularly strong<br />
impression in my<br />
memory. For as long<br />
as I can remember,<br />
dogs, especially big<br />
ones, have made me<br />
nervous.<br />
Every so often, I<br />
encounter an overly<br />
enthusiastic dog of<br />
large size. For the<br />
most part, these encounters<br />
are uneventful,<br />
as the dogs usually<br />
end up being friendly<br />
but curious. This<br />
was not one of those<br />
encounters.<br />
Upon removing my<br />
headphones, I could<br />
hear snarling. At this<br />
point, I was no longer<br />
nervous. I was afraid.<br />
But fear is a feeling<br />
I’m used to. Some<br />
call it paranoia, but<br />
I simply like to think<br />
I have a very healthy<br />
awareness of the<br />
dangers that exist in<br />
the world.<br />
My fear of dogs is a<br />
close business partner<br />
to my fears of heights,<br />
rejection and failure.<br />
If my nerves were a<br />
opinion <strong>Wingspan</strong> 11<br />
Our fears must not generate immobility<br />
co-editor<br />
co-editor<br />
Will Hebert<br />
Hannah<br />
Wheeler<br />
editor’s<br />
commentary<br />
editor’s<br />
commentary<br />
Every person has<br />
his or her personal<br />
hero. Some find heroes<br />
in great men and<br />
women of the past.<br />
Others look for heroes<br />
in the pages of adventure<br />
books. Some see<br />
heroes in those who<br />
are willing to sacrifice<br />
their own wants for<br />
the benefit of others.<br />
And still others find<br />
heroes in those they<br />
know and love.<br />
I find heroes everywhere,<br />
but more than<br />
anything I want to be<br />
a hero, too.<br />
Who doesn’t want<br />
to be a hero Yet I<br />
don’t want to be<br />
Supergirl. I just want<br />
to inspire one other<br />
person to have hope<br />
for a better future. I<br />
think heroes are made<br />
when people make<br />
the choice to be brave<br />
in the face of change,<br />
to take a chance that<br />
another person can<br />
be trusted, to find the<br />
hope and the strength<br />
to go on through<br />
adversity.<br />
I have watched<br />
people overcome<br />
obstacles and painful<br />
times while I wished<br />
for the strength to<br />
overcome my trials as<br />
well.<br />
Last December,<br />
I watched a friend<br />
break down after her<br />
mother revealed her<br />
cancer had come like<br />
a thief in the night<br />
to steal their time<br />
together. I saw her cry<br />
as though her world<br />
“Some call it paranoia, but<br />
I simply like to think I have<br />
a very healthy awareness<br />
of the dangers that exist<br />
in the world.”<br />
company, the four<br />
would be executives<br />
who control the lesser<br />
shareholders and inform<br />
them of ways to<br />
make me sleep less.<br />
While my fear of<br />
dogs was the acting<br />
president on that<br />
summer afternoon,<br />
my fear of failure has<br />
taken over this month.<br />
This is my first issue<br />
as editor of <strong>Wingspan</strong>,<br />
and the thought of<br />
being overshadowed<br />
by the work of my predecessors<br />
is looming<br />
in my mind.<br />
I have a great deal<br />
of respect for the editors<br />
who came before<br />
me and have recently<br />
was falling apart, and,<br />
the next week, I saw<br />
her pick herself up<br />
and go forward with<br />
her life. She said her<br />
mother was a hero,<br />
but I think her mother<br />
isn’t the only hero in<br />
that family.<br />
In early January,<br />
I watched my sister<br />
quietly go on without<br />
her husband<br />
after he deployed<br />
to Afghanistan for<br />
a year—she has a<br />
1-year-old daughter.<br />
I was there when<br />
people from all over<br />
realized it is now my<br />
responsibility to live<br />
up to that legacy.<br />
When the idea to<br />
apply for editorship<br />
first entered my head,<br />
it was similar to most<br />
of my ideas: It was<br />
poorly constructed<br />
and half thought<br />
through at best.<br />
Recently, I have realized<br />
what’s in store<br />
for me, and I am no<br />
longer nervous about<br />
the upcoming ordeal.<br />
I am afraid.<br />
But despite the<br />
prominence of my<br />
fear, I will not let it<br />
render me idle.<br />
The dog that had<br />
taken a dislike to me<br />
the state, friends and<br />
family came to say<br />
goodbye to my brother-in-law.<br />
I watched<br />
their daughter, oblivious<br />
to her father’s<br />
impending departure,<br />
squeak her shoes and<br />
talk gibberish at the<br />
military send-off.<br />
And later in<br />
January, I watched<br />
on TV a husband tell<br />
the world his beloved<br />
wife would get better.<br />
I watched as he cried<br />
for the 6-year-old<br />
girl who died in the<br />
parking lot where his<br />
didn’t end up ripping<br />
out my jugular.<br />
It had jumped over<br />
the fence of a nearby<br />
house (Big dogs are<br />
especially frightening<br />
in conjunction with<br />
small fences.), and<br />
the owner appeared<br />
before my impending<br />
death would have<br />
taken place.<br />
And despite some<br />
hastily made promises<br />
to the universe,<br />
I still trudge my way<br />
to many destinations.<br />
The fear still exists,<br />
and I get particularly<br />
jumpy when I think I<br />
hear a jingling collar,<br />
but I don’t let it control<br />
me.<br />
However, I have<br />
changed some things<br />
about my escapades.<br />
I am now aware of<br />
which houses bring<br />
greater chances<br />
of such a canine<br />
encounter and try to<br />
avoid those areas.<br />
wife was shot. I was<br />
amazed at the tragedy<br />
that had taken so<br />
much from so many,<br />
and yet through the<br />
death and fear people<br />
were still finding<br />
hope.<br />
I found all these<br />
people to be heroes.<br />
Although they<br />
might not look like<br />
heroes with capes<br />
and masks and even<br />
though they might<br />
scoff at the idea, they<br />
still inspired me.<br />
Webster’s dictionary<br />
defines a<br />
hero as “any person<br />
admired for qualities<br />
or achievements and<br />
regarded as an ideal or<br />
model.”<br />
Whoever said a<br />
hero must be a lifesaver<br />
Who said a hero<br />
must have superpowers<br />
Although I am<br />
afraid to fail at my<br />
new position with this<br />
publication, I will not<br />
let that fear deter me.<br />
Just as I adjusted my<br />
methods to ensure I<br />
don’t get physically<br />
mauled, I will adjust<br />
and adapt as an editor<br />
to ensure I don’t<br />
get metaphorically<br />
mauled in my new<br />
position.<br />
There will always<br />
be hazards I cannot<br />
control, and nobody<br />
can avoid failure on<br />
all levels. Despite how<br />
spiritually crushing<br />
they can feel, each<br />
failure is a learning<br />
experience.<br />
Just as I learned<br />
where not to walk,<br />
I’m quite certain I will<br />
learn in the coming<br />
months how not to<br />
organize a publication<br />
and, in the end,<br />
become more skilled<br />
at the job.<br />
Editor aspires to become everyday hero<br />
“Aren’t we heroes<br />
to ourselves just by getting<br />
through life Aren’t we<br />
heroes by never giving up<br />
hope”<br />
Aren’t we heroes<br />
to ourselves just by<br />
getting through life<br />
Aren’t we heroes by<br />
never giving up hope<br />
After watching<br />
these people, who<br />
bravely faced cancer,<br />
war and violence, who<br />
inspired hope in me, I<br />
am determined to follow<br />
in their footsteps<br />
and become a hero,<br />
if not by Webster’s<br />
definition.<br />
I may be only<br />
a loving aunt and,<br />
someday, a mother;<br />
I may be only a loyal<br />
friend through rain or<br />
shine; I may be only a<br />
young woman dreaming<br />
of adventures, but<br />
if that is all I ever am,<br />
I will be satisfied. I<br />
will grow up to be a<br />
hero, just as I always<br />
wanted.