Hackin' Up The HitsYeah, I know: v q original--everyoneelse did it lhstmonth, why am I doing itnow? Hey, this ain't exactly Details. magazinehere, we have no obligation to be on the cuttingedge (we really do need some f<strong>as</strong>hionspreads, though-right, G?). Besides, wewriter-types think that the world hinges onour every word, unaware that no one reallycares what the hell we think and that we'rejust filling up the spaces between pictures.Remember, kids: opinions are like Hootie &The Blowfish CD's--everybody's got one andthey all stink. My Top 20 of 1995:Foo Fighters, FOb Fighters : This thingrocks start to finish and there's not a badsong on it-which is it lot more than I can sayabout anything Niana did post-Nevermind(I can see the letters pouring in now). DaveGrohl wrote, played and sang everything onFw Fighters, which is.amazing, consideringthat most drummers are lean on even b<strong>as</strong>icmotor skills.Yo La Tengo,Electr-o-Pura : At the top ofthe list that I faxed to Grid magazine's poll(anything for free t-shirt) and, like everyother Y6T alb&, it sot leiis expos& thanwomen's hai-l&&dson SPN. Robitussenrock for now people.Scarce, Deadsexy : I reviewed anadvance copy of this in June, right about thetime,guitarist Chick Graning w<strong>as</strong> hospitalizedfor a severe brain hernmorhagemyreviews tend to do fhat. A&M then pushedthe rele<strong>as</strong>e date back to this coming February,thus giving me a second chance' to tell youwhat a killer album this is-great songs, rawguitars, rawer vocals, and now, probably areally cool head-scar ala Kimberly on Melrose&ce. What more do yorcwant? Get it!Mr. Bungle, Disco Volante : A TacoSupreme effort to aliem'te even those hundredor so sick08 who bought the l<strong>as</strong>t Mr.Bungle CP in '91. Lead bizarristMikePatton's squad appearantly smoked afew wheelbarrows of crack, hit the recordbutton, and charged it a! to Warner Bms.Combine thqt with zero-Faith No More buzzto co<strong>as</strong>t on this time (FNM's newest, King ForA Day, sunk quicker than Baywatch Nights ),and you've got this year's noisiqt corporateloss leader.Southern CultureOn The Skids, Dirt TrackDate : Geffen rele<strong>as</strong>edthis ? The first time Iheard Dirt Track Date Iswore it w<strong>as</strong> an ancientCreedence Clearwaterbootleg. Of course, the 8shots OF Jagermiesterdidn't help-or maybethey did, who knows? Imissed the show andnow I'll never hear thelend of it from Atheyonce I come out of ihecloset <strong>as</strong> a SCOTS fan,Les Straitjackets,report that "~ueer"b<strong>as</strong> a favorite track at E-crazed Joe Waldholta's weekend raves--tryto get that image out3pf your brain!Radiohead, The qnds : Whoever the pinheadat Cdpitol w<strong>as</strong> who decided that "FakePl<strong>as</strong>tic Trees" (a song so mellow, even Yannifans nodded OH) shoul4 be the first single offThe Bends needs his <strong>as</strong>smthreaded.Someone finally smelledlthe ether later in theyear and <strong>issue</strong>d "Just," pesibly the best songand video of '95. For being,skinny whiteEnglish guys, Radiohead bow how to pileon the guitars-it's almost anough to makeme forgive the UK for shit lke Bush andMensw&r, but I'm going to+ a 1ittIemore convincing ...the best places tohad to be left off due to legal th*ts fromStevie Wonder. Answer of the yept4: "Ifthere's nothing new in rock n' roll, why bother?":"Because they giye you lo&+ ofmoney1'-yeah!CEl<strong>as</strong>tica, El<strong>as</strong>tica : OK, let's jusbhake itthree. Stimboy sez he prefers Blur t&<strong>as</strong>isbecause "Blur writes bad Madness sangs,O<strong>as</strong>is writes bad Small Faces songs: tpchoice is clear." El<strong>as</strong>tica's US debut isk$ockfulla loaned lick from Wire (they've g6t thelawsdt to prove it), but who cares when itsounds this cool? Also one of the best liveshows of the year-for skinny white Englishgirls, that is.The Amps, Pacer : Full-figured all-American girl Kim Deal's side project (orsideside project, depending on the status ofthe Breeders these days) The Amps are a littlevague on details-is it a opewoman show?Were aliens in the studid.hw is fl<strong>as</strong>hbackto the Pixie's heyday, wi€h gore than g littleglue-sniffing vertigo throvh in and NOscreaming fat guys.Royal Tnur, Thank You : Any album thatmakes you feel like you need a shower afteronly one listening h<strong>as</strong> to be good. SingerJulie Herramma gives a close approximationof Ax1 Rose gargling gl<strong>as</strong>s, while the bandserves up a Southern Boogie-via-Lower E<strong>as</strong>tside meatloaf (that's small "mu). I'm willingto bet that RT lives for the day when that guyyells out "Freebird" at a show-they'd delivera rendition that could sterilize the BibleBelt (and isn't about time someone did that?).The Presidents Of The United States OfAmerica, The Presidents Of The United StatesOf America : After typing out thetitle, theremay not be mom to say anything about theCD itself! The bio blurb goes: "3 guys, 5strings, one nation under God." Whateverthisis just flat-out, loopy rock and there reallyaren't enough songs about dune buggies inthe world these days.Eve's Plum, Cherry Alive : Speaking ofpower pop, Eve's Plum gets ragged on forbeing Blondie With Balls-well, someone'sgot to do it! Cherry Alive is thier secondalbum of sweet n' sour chainsaw pop, but theone to look for is l<strong>as</strong>t year's live EP I Want ItAll, featuring the ultimate speed-punk versionof that dim cl<strong>as</strong>sic "I Will Survive"-suck on that, Drips. 'Eleven, Thunk! : Eleven may forever beknown <strong>as</strong> Jack Irons' Band Between The ChiliPeppers And PearSJam. Too bad, becauseThunk! (or either of-thier previous 2 GDs) @better than anything Eddie & The LQSm , .have wheezed out in years. Unforturiately,,Eleven is on Hollywood Records, who ratherspend thier advertising $ on no-hit wonderslike Gwen Mars, or exhuming FreddyMercury one more time .PJ Harvey, To Bring You My h e : oliveOyYs revenge.Vim, Vim : Hate to sound like that otherhack, but you suck for missing this show.Vim played SK on December 1st to an audienceof about eight, counting bartenders vdthe opening band. Vim , the CD, is layeredwith thick b<strong>as</strong>s chording, space gtriters,tamburs and diimbek (?), and D..Cawley'ssoaring Chrissie Hynde-does-Cranberriesvoice. It's also hard to come by since it's anindependent (i.e. self) rele<strong>as</strong>i?, so try this:Vim, PO Box 301, Redwood Estates, CA95044; emaik Rick@netpower.com-tmt me,it's worth the effort*
Joan Osborne, Relish : Anoth& amazing live show, but this one(Zepyhr) w<strong>as</strong> packed to the walls. Relish only hints at the sheerpower Joan Osbome lets loose onstage-yeah, I'm the one whocoined the term "Led Joplin" for her. The album (rele<strong>as</strong>ed in March)w<strong>as</strong> barely noticed until September, when Mercury finally. gotaround to m*g "One Of Us" a pri~rity single. As usual, the firstsingleis the most annoying thiicg on the ahole album: "What if Godw<strong>as</strong> one of &"-he'd take this fucking song out of rotation and puton "Right Hand Mand," "Spider Web," or "Let's Just Get Naked"and cancel -VH-l !Plus, a couple of compilations:Saturday Morning Cartoons' Greatest Hits (various): LizPhair/Material Issue cranking out The Bamna Splits, Matthew Sweetswingin' to Scooby Doo, Where Are You? , Butthole Surfers performingunnatural acts on Underdog, Sublime giving a dub/& makeover to aHong Kmg Phooey -where the hell is The Tick ?! And'Ruisted Willie (various): That's right-Willie Nelson covers!Done old and new school by L7 w/ Waylon Jennings (!),Supersuckets, Best Kissers In The Wor1d;Steel Pole Bathtub, JohnnyC<strong>as</strong>h, Rev. Horton Heat, and Kelley "FedEx-when you redly needit by tomorrow" Deal w/ Krii Kristofferson. Cool stuff, but alsoproof-positive that the Tribute Album well is running a little drywho'snext? William Shatner? .-Helm Wolf dHelenwoJ+l.com
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