You're Not Alone: The Journey from Abduction to Empowerment

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TAMARA’S STORYLife, I have found, is not so muchabout the endpoint, but about thejourney and how one responds toexperiences along the way. It is filledwith hidden corners, obstacles that mayseem impossible to overcome, mightytriumphs, pain, fear, utter happiness,passion, and events one could neverimagine until they become a reality.I would like to share part of my life storywith you, a story that begins when I was 16 years old and was kidnapped atgunpoint by a man I did not know. I open myself to you because we have twothings in common. We were abducted and made it back alive, and we both havethe ability to take back what was snatched from us—the freedom to live our lives.The importance of telling you my story lies in the things I have done to empowermyself in response to that experience. It lies in my journey, filled with hard work,healing, challenges, and triumphs over the trauma. As much as I would love to saythat one day you will wake up and the work will be over, it will not. However, itdoes get easier with time.I hope that sharing my successes and the mistakes that I have made in dealingwith my abduction will help you on your journey. I have turned my own journey,although it has had its hardships, heartbreaks, and pain, into something amazing,not because I am a superhuman in disguise, but because of how I chose torespond to what happened.My name is Tamara and I am 21 years old. I will be finishing my bachelor’sdegree in June 2008. I have been dancing since high school and I spend as muchof my free time as possible out with friends, my family, at the beach, or curling upwith a good book and my kitty. When I was 16, my life took an unexpected turnwhen I was kidnapped from my hometown.Before that point I was an ordinary teenager—boy crazy like all of my friends,excited about my first real prom still a year away, and 2 years shy of graduating10
high school. I played sports, was a straight “A” student, and was always doingsomething goofy to make my friends laugh. The summer I turned 16 I felt on topof the world. A week after my 16th birthday, on July 31, 2002, when I was at alookout point with one of my best friends, I was abducted at gunpoint and myfriend was left behind, tied up. I was then to endure one of the most difficultexperiences of my life.A few hours later, my captor took another young woman. Together we chose tofight back and although we were unsuccessful, we did not give up. Approximately16 hours later we were found, largely thanks to the success of California’s firstAMBER Alert. After he fired a shot from his gun, our captor was shot to death bythe police. Moments later it was over. We were safe. We had survived.THE FIRST FEW HOURSWe were first taken to the hospital to ensure that we were okay. Upon our arrival,we were taken inside on gurneys, covered head to toe with sheets. The media, viathe AMBER Alert, had been airing our story from the beginning, and as a resulteveryone wanted to be the first to get a picture of us or catch us on film.Everything became a rush afterthat. Detectives questioned usand put us into separate roomsas the hospital performed a fullmedical examination to collectany physical evidence. Thatexperience felt like anotherviolation all over again, but itwas necessary. At the time I didnot understand what was goingon or why I had to undergo somany procedures. I was still ina state of shock from the realityof being kidnapped, and thenthe reality of being found.“When I came home, everyone wanted tohug me. The problem was that I didn’twant to be touched. At the same time, Iunderstood that it was what they neededto help them heal and deal with what theyhad been through while I was missing. So,I thought okay, go ahead and hug me. Andwhen I hugged my family, they also realizedthat I was uncomfortable and needed tobe alone. We needed to reestablish boundaries.We needed time to figure out whatwas okay and what wasn’t. ”11
Page 1: U.S. Department of JusticeOffice of
Page 4 and 5: U.S. Department of JusticeOffice of
Page 6 and 7: LETTER FROM THE AUTHORSLike you, we
Page 10 and 11: You may feel that you need some spa
Page 12: Remember, you cannot do this alone.
Page 17 and 18: “The day after I was rescued, I h
Page 19 and 20: in pieces when I came home. But thr
Page 21: Remember:>> Seek out the people you
Page 24 and 25: SAM’S STORYMy story is not your a
Page 26 and 27: I eventually realized that was okay
Page 28 and 29: SECTION 3: GETTING IN THE DRIVER’
Page 30 and 31: YOUR RIGHTSRemember that you have r
Page 32 and 33: ELIZABETH’S STORYBelieve it or no
Page 34 and 35: REACHING OUTWhen I needed someone,
Page 36 and 37: SECTION 4: NAVIGATING THE ROADBLOCK
Page 38 and 39: “I only go on media if I believe
Page 40 and 41: POLICE INVESTIGATIONSOne thing that
Page 42 and 43: VICTIM IMPACT STATEMENTAt the sente
Page 44 and 45: MAGGIE’S STORYMy name is Maggie a
Page 46 and 47: come to depend on. And believe it o
Page 48 and 49: FINDING YOUR STRENGTHIt is not easy
Page 50 and 51: SECTION 5: THE NEW NORMALWhat you h
Page 52 and 53: RETURNING TO SCHOOLReturning to sch
Page 54 and 55: CELEBRITY STATUSBe prepared to live
Page 56 and 57: ALICIA’S STORYWelcome home! You a
Page 58 and 59: IT’S NOT YOUR FAULTIt took me a w
Page 60 and 61: want to know whom I am talking to a
Page 62 and 63: A LETTER TOPARENTSDear Parents,As s
Page 64 and 65:
WHERE TO FINDMORE HELPEveryone who
Page 66 and 67:
Through the Office for Victims of C
Page 68:
YOUR STORY64
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You're Not Alone: The Journey from Abduction to Empowerment

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